He was so damned polite that her teeth clenched in frustration, and her mood took a nosedive.
Everything felt awkward. Horribly awkward.
Okay, so she hadn’t thought through exactly how the aftermath of an affair with her secret crush/boss/brothers’ best friend would turn out. But she’d never wanted it to be like this.
She didn’t expect him to declare his undying love for her or anything, but she’d thought they’d at least manage to be adults about it. She’d hoped they could keep the pleasure they’d shared in each other’s arms from conflicting with their jobs.
Was it because her brother had called? Was that why Cal had gone all twitchy? Was he worried that Daniel would kill him if he found out? Was he worried that she was going to dash off the plane and tell everyone in her family what they’d done?
The pilot told them over the intercom to buckle up for landing, which meant they were now stuck in the same room for the next ten minutes. In that case, there was no time like the present to lay it all out in the open before things got any weirder.
“Cal, you don’t have to worry. I’m not going to tell Daniel—or any of my brothers—about what just happened.”
“About that…” Frown lines appeared on his forehead. “Today was great.”
She nodded, doing everything she could to reply in an easy tone despite her twisting stomach. “It was.”
“You’re an amazing woman.” He breathed in deeply, let it out.
She was about to say something to diffuse the fraught situation, but changed her mind, deciding to see where he went with it.
“But, uh, I’m your boss.” His gaze focused somewhere over her left shoulder. “So—”
She couldn’t stay quiet a moment more. She had to jump in. “So you’re regretting what happened?”
At last, he met her gaze. “It can’t happen again,” he replied, not answering her question. “We work together. Your family trusts me with you. I’m much older than you. None of this is—” He searched for a word, his Adam’s apple sliding. “Appropriate.”
A devil on her shoulder urged her to show him just how much better their time in his bed had been than the teeny-tiny amount of pleasure they’d get from being appropriate.
But the truth was that she hadn’t slept with Cal expecting a commitment—she’d simply found him irresistible. She’d acted first and decided to deal with the fallout later. What’s more, her job was extremely important to her. She wanted to prove herself at the foundation, wanted to keep learning so she could be the best she possibly could.
So if being awkwardly brushed aside by Cal bruised her insides, she firmly reminded herself there was no point in being upset because he hadn’t tossed a bunch of pretty words her way. Because he hadn’t told her she was special. Because he hadn’t said he couldn’t imagine being without her. Because he hadn’t begged to be with her again. Because he hadn’t laid his heart at her feet. Because he’d put up a huge, thick wall in front of the idea of ever sleeping with her again.
“You took the words out of my mouth,” she said without inflection as she tucked any and all secret feelings for Cal back inside and shoved them down deep where they would never again see the light of day. “We had fun. And neither of us needs to feel weird or uncomfortable about what happened.” She forced a smile. “Especially when we both agree that nothing like that will ever happen again.”
No matter what.
Just like that, it was as if the hours she’d shared with Cal had never happened. As the pilot brought them down for a landing, they discussed a couple of questions Dane had emailed after their meeting. Then they landed and prepared to say good-bye, given that it was already late afternoon.
“I’ve been meaning to tell you,” Cal said as she got into a taxi. “I’m heading to Miami for a new project I’ve got going and then up the East Coast for some Maverick ventures. While I’m on the road, I’ll put in some face-to-face time with potential donors from Dane’s list, and you can stay in San Francisco and deal with the administration and accounting work and any overflow.”
She stared at him, speechless for a moment. Until finally she managed to say, “But you told Daniel I was great with Dane Harrington. That I can handle the donor stuff.”
He nodded, though she couldn’t help but think he looked distinctly uncomfortable and unable to meet her eyes. “You were great with Dane. And if there are potential donors in the Bay Area, you should definitely meet with them. But we don’t need to be in each other’s pockets at the foundation. I trust you to take care of anything that comes your way. And I’ll be just a phone call away if you do need anything.”
Hadn’t he believed her when she’d agreed they should keep their relationship all business?
Or maybe she was blowing his comments out of proportion, unable to think straight after everything they’d done on the plane, and attributing meaning to his words that simply wasn’t there.
“Okay,” she said, “you take care of business and bring in a ton of donors, and I’ll call if I run into any problems on my end.”
His gaze connected with hers again for one brief moment, and she swore she saw a flash of heat before regret came smashing down. Then he closed the door, and the taxi took her away.
Away from Cal.
Chapter Nine
Three weeks later…
Lyssa and Cal spoke on the phone, texted, emailed. It was all business. She went out of her way to act as if they hadn’t danced in a private capsule on the London Eye. As if they hadn’t painted each other. As if they’d never touched or kissed or climbed into his bed together. In fact, she’d never been so businesslike in all her life.
When she was by herself, however, it was a different story. No matter how much she tried to tell herself she didn’t miss him, the truth was that she did. A lot. Missed brainstorming with him in the office. Missed sharing a burrito at lunch. Missed staying late poring over spreadsheets and secretly being glad that he was with her instead of on one of his many dates.
It was even worse at night, when she was alone in her bed and couldn’t stop remembering how it felt to be in his arms. How it felt as though all her romantic dreams had come true.
Even though they most definitely had not.
Just then, the outer door to their office opened, and with a glance at the clock, she realized Dane Harrington had arrived for their meeting. Mary, their receptionist, lost the power of speech when she looked at him. With his dark hair and devilishly blue eyes, Dane was a seriously handsome man. Other women must fall at his feet, literally go weak in the knees and need to put out a hand to remain standing. But there was only one man who had ever made Lyssa’s heart race and turned her knees weak.
She put a stop to her train of thought. Lyssa was done mooning over men she worked with. She’d never make that mistake again. Besides, although there was no question that Dane was a great-looking billionaire, there was no spark between them.
No, Cal had taken all her sparks with him when he’d left.
Rising from her desk to greet Dane, she held out her hand. “It’s so good to see you again. I hope everything went well with your resort opening.”