The question was why had he disappeared on her?
Their sex was so powerful, so all-consuming that it was clear he was attracted to her. So it wasn’t that he’d been trying to let her down easy.
He was genuinely over the moon about the baby, so it wasn’t that he didn’t want children.
And once he’d known she was pregnant, he’d become intent on persuading her to marry him, so he wasn’t marriage averse.
But why had he held back initially? And why, even now, did she feel as though he was still keeping a part of himself hidden from her?
Was it because he knew she was still weighing all the pros and cons? Or could it have something to do with his reaction when she’d asked him about his past, even something as innocuous as where he’d gone to college?
Mired in her own emotions about his leaving and the baby, she hadn’t been able to see the forest for the trees where Cal was concerned. But now, she could start to see things more clearly. To see him more clearly.
Only one thing was absolutely certain thus far: Cal never liked to talk about his past.
Which begged the question yet again. Why?
* * *
They rose late after that wonderful night of loving and climbed down the cliff path to walk along the narrow strip of beach. Surfers were out there catching the waves.
Cal had made love to Lyssa again in the early hours, the night so dark he couldn’t see her. It was so damn sexy, their touches and sighs and kisses and bodies coming together.
He wanted Lyssa and their child with everything in him. He wanted the kind of family he’d never had. He hoped the day, and night, they’d just spent together had tempted her at least part of the way along the path to loving him.
Especially since he was all the way there himself.
He took her hand as they walked, enjoying the ease between them, the romance of a walk along the shore.
Lyssa pulled her jacket tighter around her with her free hand. “It’s gorgeous out here.”
“Absolutely gorgeous,” he said, seeing only her.
“Look at those mind-blowing waves.”
As she said it, a monster wave crashed down on a surfer, throwing his board high in the air, tossing him around like a blender might, until he eventually popped up.
There was a lot more Cal could have told her about his life, beyond going to Harvard and pivoting from law to business. He rarely talked about his younger years. The Mavericks knew, because they’d deliberately plied him with alcohol to pry out a few secrets. They each had enough dark secrets of their own that they could accept his history without so much as a blink.
But what would Lyssa think?
“Where should we go next?” She looked at him with a glow on her face, the inner light Lyssa always possessed. “I chose axe throwing and glamping. That means it’s your turn.”
He was glad he had a great idea to throw her way. “What do you think about heading to Cambria to watch the light show in Paso Robles after dark?”
“You mean like a laser light show?”
“Not quite.” He pulled out his phone and brought up the website. Turning the phone toward her, he watched her face as she scrolled, her eyes growing wider, her smile bigger.
“This looks incredible.”
The site displayed a field of flowers made of solar lights that charged in the sun all day. At night, they were brilliant, creating shapes and waves across the landscape for a dazzling light show.
“I’ve always liked outdoor art and the way it not only uses the elements, like how this guy is using solar to power the lights, but the way it actually becomes part of the elements.”
“What other outdoor art have you seen?”
“In Palm Springs, there was a display of giant metal babies crawling around a huge sandbox. They had no faces, just a stripe down the middle like a bar code.” He raised an eyebrow. “I believe it was supposed to represent the dehumanization of society. But I just thought it made them look soulless.” He pursed his lips. “And I don’t believe we’re a soulless generation.”
Lyssa snorted. “I bet Charlie would have a field day with babies.” Sebastian’s fiancée would not make them soulless. “All of her work is so upbeat.”
Cal wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close, holding her tight against him. “That’s why I liked the London street art so much. It brightened my mood with all the brilliant colors.”
This time, she was the one raising an eyebrow. “As I recall, you liked the street art other people made, but hated your own.”
“You’re right. I didn’t like the idea of doing my own art. But I’ve found myself looking at the pictures of it more than once. And I have to admit…I actually kind of like what I did now.”
She hugged him hard. “I’m so glad. What you made was brilliant. And even if it wasn’t, I still would have loved it, simply because you made it.”
Did she know how much she’d just revealed to him? That she’d told him something mattered to her because he’d imagined it? Did that mean she was closer to loving him than she knew?
Clearly, he needed to make a point of revealing himself to her. Take the street art—all this time, she’d thought he hated what he’d done, when the truth was he’d cherish their day in London forever. It had been one of the best days of his life.
In all the years since his family had fallen apart, nothing surpassed the time he’d spent with Lyssa.
“I loved dancing on the London Eye,” he told her, wanting her to know it all now. “I loved the street art. I loved glamping. I even loved axe throwing.”
“Thank you for telling me that,” she said, laughing in his arms.
The way her happiness bubbled up and out so freely made him want to make love to her right on this narrow strip of beach.
All he wanted, from now until forever, was to make Lyssa Spencer happy.
The question remained. Could he do it through sheer determination and depth of love?
Or was he bound to fail the same way his father had?
* * *
“I haven’t relaxed into a vacation like this since I got out of college.” Lyssa leaned back in her seat with a happy sigh as Cal maneuvered the car along the coastal road’s winding curves.
“I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself,” he said as he reached out to put his hand over hers.
Being with Cal felt so good, was so much fun. He made her feel so safe. And at the same time, he respected her mind, her ideas, and the way she could take care of herself.
She looked at his gorgeous profile, then out at the ocean’s breathtaking waves. Being with him was at once calming and incredibly exciting. Especially when she thought about all those deliciously wicked things they’d done in bed. And that sexy interlude on Catalina, too, even if it had ended badly.
When her stomach rumbled, it was a good thing they’d just rolled into Ragged Point, a small coastal town with a few cute shops, a resort, and a couple of restaurants.
“Hungry?”
She rubbed her stomach. “Hungry times two.”
His eyes lit the way they always did when they talked about the baby. It warmed every part of her that he truly wanted to be a father.
Suddenly, she spied the perfect place. “Let’s eat there. Frank’s Fish Market.”
He slowed in front of the restaurant. “The line is a mile long.”