“Take the piss all you want, mate. I have a system.” He stuck the portfolios on an already overflowing shelf. “Besides, it’s not like I have an assistant right now. Most of this stuff will move to my studio anyway. Once that’s done, it’ll be downright neat in here.”
Lex just laughed. “Sure. Whatever you say.”
His brother studied him as they left his office and took the back hall to the staff parking lot. “So, what’s with you?”
Lex shoved his hands into his pockets and kept his gaze looking ahead. He didn’t need Xander probing into the dark recesses of his mind. “Nothing. Why do you ask?”
Xander dropped his camera bag in the boot, then strolled around to the driver’s side of his Pagani Huayra. “Seriously, Alexi? You seem to forget it’s my job to study the nuances of human features and emotion then capture those moments.”
Lex wasn’t in the mood for his brother’s attempts at psychoanalysis. He carefully opened the passenger door of the Huayra. The car was both the fastest and the flashiest of Xander’s vehicles. Lex preferred to run around in something more subtle, but his brother liked the attention. Although, Lex had to admit, the thing was cool.
“I’m not biting, Xander. Let it go.”
“I can’t. It’s written all over your face. The tight set of your mouth. When you smile, it doesn’t quite reach your eyes. Your body has a rigidity to it. Especially in your shoulders. Like you’re poised and ready to take action on something. Not to mention you’re fidgety as hell.”
Lex immediately stopped playing with the hem on his hoodie. “I am not fidgety.”
“Come on. Why don’t you just tell me what it is? Is it Gemma?”
Lex was careful to keep his voice neutral. “When did you become an agony aunt? I’m fine.”
Xander narrowed his eyes and studied him as they came to the stop sign at the campus exit. “No, it’s not Gemma, but it is a woman. Go ahead and tell me I’m wrong.”
“You’re wrong.” He kept his face averted toward the window. Maybe dinner with his brother had been a bad idea.
“You forget I know you better than anyone. Who is she?”
Lex dropped his head against the headrest. “She’s no one. Just a girl. I don’t even know her name.” But as luck would have it, he’d seen her with Max’s girlfriend. So if he was so inclined he could track her down.
Xander shook his head. “See, I’ve got the skills of a detective. Maybe when this photography thing is over I should join Scotland Yard. Screw that I’m going big. MI-6 all the way.”
Despite himself, Lex laughed. “You’re full of shit.”
“Maybe, but I figured out some woman is tying you in knots. Gemma got a clue?”
Xander was the only one who knew the truth behind his relationship with Gemma. And he thought Lex was insane to go along with it. “There’s nothing to tell Gemma. I haven’t done anything. And I’m not going to.” He said through ground teeth. He couldn’t pursue it. He wanted it too much.
“Yeah right. You’ve got the look of a man on a tight string.” His brother shook his head as he easily navigated the streets of Ealing on his way to the motorway. “Though I have to say, I like this look on you.”
Lex frowned. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“Oh, I dunno. I feel like you’ve used your relationship with Gemma as an excuse to never get close to anyone. Sure you have a discrete dalliance here, a hot fling there, but you’ve never had to be in a real relationship. With someone you care about, who would actually have to get to know the real you.”
“Shut it, Xander.”
His brother laughed. “Why? Because I’m telling you the truth? You are avoiding intimacy because you’re afraid of what you’ll have to show and share. It’s classic.”
Lex rolled his eyes. “Oh, I’m the one with love issues? Says the man who goes through women like you’ve heard there will be a store closing on them or something.”
Xander grinned. “I do love women. But we weren’t talking about me. Besides, I’ve turned over a new leaf. Women are to be treated with respect. We were talking about you and some woman getting under your skin. It’s a good look for you.”
“Wow, Xan, I had no idea you were such a romantic.” He eyed his brother again. “Shit, you’re not sleeping with another one of your students, are you?”
Xander’s eyes bugged. “No! Hell no. I learned my lesson the first time.”
Lex laughed. “You know they have those rules for a reason.”
“I said I’m not fucking sleeping with her.”
“Her, so there’s a her?”
Xander cursed. “No. I have a student. She’s promising, that’s it.”
“And you want to sleep with her.”
“No. Damn it. I want to teach her.”
Lex had to laugh. “Exactly what do you want to teach her, Xan?”
“Shut up, Baby Brother.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.”
Xander was quiet for several moments before he quietly said, “The old man called me. Or rather had Mum call me.”
“Fucking fantastic. Whose side are you on, Xander?”
“Yours. Always yours.”
Lex glared at his brother. “Then why are you pushing his agenda?”
“I’m not. I swear. I personally think you should tell the geezer to fuck off like I did. I just worry he’ll pull the trigger on his threat.”
“Well, he’s welcome to. In a few weeks, I won’t need his money.”
“It’s more than money you’re walking away from, Lex. It’s not always easy to do. I wouldn’t think any less of you if you took his deal.”
Blood boiled under Lex’s skin. “After everything that happened, you think I’d take the easy way out? I don’t want anything from him.”
“And everything comes back to that.”
Lex ground his teeth. “Of course it comes back to that. We were kids Xan. He was supposed to love us and instead he treated us like we’d tarnished his good name.”
“Never said he wasn’t a prick.”
“Well, I want nothing from that prick. I knew that night he didn’t give a shit about us.”
His brother nodded. “Also true. That night changed everything, but we survived.”
Had they? Lex didn’t feel like he’d survived. He felt like a storm battered buoy most of the time. “It was a hell of a price to pay.”
Xander nodded slowly. “Just as long as you understand what that will mean for you.”
“Yeah, it will mean my freedom.”
55
Dinner with his brother had gone infinitely better once they stopped talking about their father. Though, Lex knew next time he’d have to lay off the Scotch. It had been two days and he still hadn’t fully recovered.
His skin buzzed, his brain was foggy, and his focus was shot to hell. But that could easily be because he knew he was about to see his mystery girl again. His blood rushed just thinking of having her in his arms again.