I could tell she was going to ask me how it went, and I didn’t really want to talk about it. All I’d told her was that I was going out with a man I’d met at a bar, which wasn’t technically a lie.
I yawned quickly and stretched my arms behind my head. “But now I’m exhausted. I’m going to go to bed.”
“Okay,” she said, winking at me. “We’ll try to keep it down.”
“Where is Josh, anyway?” I asked.
“He ran to the bathroom.”
Great. I hoped he wasn’t going to be spending tons of time in there. I wanted to shower before I changed into some comfy PJs and curled up in bed. I was tired, but I was thinking about doing some studying before I fell asleep. I hadn’t done my reading or any of my case studies yet this weekend, and by Monday I was going to be woefully behind.
Still, the thought of pulling out my books and laptop felt overwhelming when my eyes already felt heavy. I would get up early tomorrow, I told myself. I’d get up early and go down to my favorite coffee shop, spread out my books and papers, order myself a muffin and the biggest coffee they had and just immerse myself in my work. My regular schoolwork. Not Noah work.
I was completely caught up in my own thoughts, which is why I didn’t notice that my bedroom door was open. I always kept it shut when I left. Not because I didn’t trust Julia, but because I didn’t know the friends she occasional brought over, and I figured a closed door would discourage them from going into my space.
As I got closer to my room, I heard a sound coming from inside, almost like a gasping sound. My heart quickened as I peeked around the corner and peered through doorway.
It was Josh.
I let out a sigh of relief, thankful it wasn’t an intruder. I’d been spending too much time at police stations and BDSM clubs. Not everything was something sinister, I told myself.
But my relief was short-lived. Josh was standing over by my dresser, the top drawer open. He was breathing hard, and at first I thought he was hurt. Then I thought he was rummaging through my doors looking for something.
I flipped on the light.
Josh turned around, a look of surprise on his face.
He had one hand on his dresser, bracing himself. In his other hand, he held a pair of my panties, which were wrapped around his dick. He was jerking off into them, his hand moving up and down furiously.
“What the fuck?” I screamed. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Nothing,” he replied calmly, not even having the decency to look like he was upset or embarrassed at being caught. He stroked himself a couple more times into my panties, making sure I knew exactly what it was he was doing. Then he put my underwear back in my drawer and zipped up his pants.
“It wasn’t nothing,” I said. “You were jerking off using my panties.”
“What’s going on?” Julia asked, appearing in the hallway. She was still holding the spoon covered with tomato sauce in her hand, and she licked it off and looked at me expectantly. “I heard yelling.”
“Nothing,” Josh said, walking out of my room and into the hallway. “I was coming out of the bathroom and I thought I saw a mouse in Charlotte’s room.”
“Ooh,” Julia said, nodding. “There was one in the kitchen last night, too. I guess we’re going to have to call an exterminator.”
I looked at Josh incredulously. Did he really think I was going to let him get away with what I just saw him doing? “There was no mouse,” I said, my heart rate accelerating. “Josh went into my room and started going through my things. I caught him jerking off into a pair of my panties.”
I looked at Julia expectantly, waiting for her to become outraged and kick Josh out. Maybe we should even call the police.
“What?” Josh asked, sounding shocked. “You’re joking, right?”
“No, I’m not joking.” I crossed into my room and pulled out the pair of underwear he’d just been holding. “It was this one.”
“That’s not funny, Charlotte,” Julia said, putting her had on Josh’s shoulder. “Not even as a joke.”
“I’m not joking,” I said. “He was jerking off right in my room, Julia.”
“You’re crazy,” Josh said. He shook his head and looked at Julia. “I would never do something like that.”
“Charlotte, that’s a really fucked up thing to lie about,” Julia said. Her eyes got steely and hard, and she stared me down. “You really need to think about what you say before you say it.”
“Julia,” I said calmly. “I’m not lying.” The two of them were standing in the doorway staring at me like I was some kind of deranged criminal. I felt scared, and ganged up on, not to mention the violation of having someone come into my bedroom and go through my underwear drawer.
“Charlotte, enough!” Julia said.
“No,” I said. “I won’t. He was jerking off using my panties.”
“Stop saying that!” Julia said. “He saw a mouse in your room. He wouldn’t have…” She trailed off, looking embarrassed, and I knew what she had been about to say. That Josh wouldn’t have been so turned on by me that he needed to sneak into my room and ruffle through my pantry drawer. I wasn’t hot enough.
“It’s okay,” Josh said, rubbing Julia’s back. “She’s obviously upset that we’re hanging out. Maybe we should get out of here.”
“Yeah, we definitely should,” Julia said. “I’ve lost my appetite anyway.” She threw me a dirty look over her shoulder and grabbed Josh’s hand.
A second later I heard the door open and close.
I sat down on my bed. My hands were shaking and I could feel the blood rushing through my body, pounding in my ears. My stomach turned. I felt dirty somehow, like I wanted to get in the shower and stay under the spray for a long, long, time.
Relax, I told myself. He’s gone now. He didn’t hurt you. He didn’t touch you. You’re safe.
My phone began ringing, and I glanced at the caller ID.
Noah.
I picked up.
“Hello?”
“I’ve been driving around your neighborhood for the past fifteen minutes, wondering what possible excuse I could come up with to see you again.”
The sound of his voice was so comforting, so warm, that I immediately burst into tears.
“Charlotte,” Noah said, his voice darkening. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s nothing,” I said. “It’s stupid. It’s just… remember that guy Josh, the one who came to your office with me the other night?”
“I’ll be right there.” The line went dead.
He swept into my apartment a couple of minutes later, gathering me into his arms as I cried.
“Shh,” he said, stroking my hair. “Shh, you’re fine, it’s okay.”
He led me over to the couch, sat me down and got me water from the kitchen.
“Thanks,” I said, accepting it gratefully and trying not to gulp it down.
“Tell me what happened.”
“It was nothing, really. I’m overreacting.” I took in a shuddering breath and wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. “It’s just that when I got back here tonight, my roommate had Josh over, you know, the guy from Professor Worthington’s class. She was making him spaghetti sauce.”