“Ah. And your sweetheart, she’s the inappropriate American?”
“Yes.”
“So you both went into it knowing that it was for business. What’s the big deal?”
Loch was silent.
“So she doesn’t know it was for business,” Rex guessed. “And that’s what’s bothering you.”
He nodded. “I do like her. She’s smart, funny . . .”
“Good in the sack?” Rex guessed. “Else I suspect we wouldn’t be having this conversation.”
He didn’t answer that, though Rex wasn’t wrong. “I feel like I should have said something, but now it’s too late. Anything I try to say at this point to correct the matter will just make it seem worse. I know I’m going to hurt her, and that bothers me. It’s the last thing I want.”
Rex shoved two ketchup-covered fries into his mouth and chewed noisily. “So don’t tell her. Fuck her for a while, set up house, have some fun, and then get a divorce. She never needs to know the truth.”
That didn’t sit well with Loch, either. “There’s another problem—I don’t plan on setting up house. I have a home back in my home country. I plan on returning there.”
“She invited?” Rex continued to eat between questions.
“If she wants to go. It hasn’t come up in conversation.”
He grunted.
“The entire situation bothers me,” Loch admitted.
“Don’t see why,” Rex said, then gestured at Loch’s plate. “You going to eat that?”
Loch pushed the plate toward Rex. “What do you mean, you don’t see why it bothers me?”
Rex picked up Loch’s hamburger. He lifted it to his mouth, then paused. “Do you really want to know what I think, or are you just looking for sympathy and a pat on the back?”
“I really want to know what you think. Most people just tell me what they think I want to hear.”
“I think you shouldn’t have any guilt at all.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, what’s the point?”
Loch frowned. “But Taylor—”
“You haven’t thought about her or how she feels since day one,” Rex said. “Why you starting now?”
Stung, Loch straightened in his seat. “That’s not true. I—”
“You want what you want, and it doesn’t matter what anyone else wants,” Rex said bluntly. “So you left home because you didn’t want to be a king. That’s a damn first-world problem if there ever was one. Then you go after a girl that your family will hate so they won’t consider you to be king material. And you offer to marry her because it suits you. And you’re going to go home and leave her here because it suits you. Tell me which part of that is the part where you were thinking about her feelings?”
Loch was silent.
Rex ate. “It’s real easy to use people when you don’t care if you hurt them.” He wiped his mouth with a napkin, and then shoved the napkin in his pocket. “That’s when it becomes a problem.”
He wasn’t wrong . . . about any of it. He hadn’t gone into this situation considering Taylor’s feelings. He’d plowed ahead with his own plans and never stopped to think about how she would feel. And Taylor was a sweet, lovely person who gave herself wholeheartedly. And now that he knew that . . . it bothered Loch that he’d used her. “So what do I do?”
“You either figure out that you don’t give a shit and carry on your merry way, or you figure out that you do give a shit, and you fix it and hope she forgives you.”
Loch nodded. “I’ll talk to her.” Soon. As soon as he got the courage to confess what an ass he’d been. He wasn’t looking forward to it, though. He picked up the check left on the counter and studied it, then looked at Rex. Uncouth or not, the man had been a good friend and a willing ear, and Loch appreciated it. “If all goes like I think it will, I won’t be in the city for much longer. Is there anything I can do to help you get back on your feet?”
Rex snorted.
“What?”
“Why are you offering? Because it helps me or because it helps you feel better about yourself? You think about that and let me know.”
The man was as prickly as a porcupine, but as usual, his barbs hit the mark. Loch nodded slowly, put the money for the check down on the counter, and left the diner.
As he walked back to the hotel, he thought about Taylor. He thought about what would happen if he told her the truth. He imagined her pretty face awash with tears, and the hurt he would see in her eyes. He didn’t want to do that to her.
Maybe it was better to just do as Rex said and pretend as if nothing was wrong. That he planned on marrying her for all the right reasons. She didn’t have to know the truth. There was no point.
He’d rather have Taylor smiling than unhappy any day. And when the divorce would come up . . . well, he’d cross that bridge when he got there.
For now, it was enough that they were happy and life was good.
***
Two days after the convention, Taylor noticed something was . . . off. Not with Loch, because he’d been wonderful and being engaged to him was like something out of a dream. Rather, it was silence that was bothering her. Silence from Sigmund in particular.
She checked her phone, in case it was messed up and his texts weren’t coming through. If that was the case, he’d be utterly frantic that she hadn’t been online for more than a pop-in here and there, mostly to check messages and to update her character’s “last played” notification so it’d look as if she were playing . . . when she really wasn’t. The convention had been nice, but being with Loch was nicer. Yesterday they’d gone to a rock-climbing gym and . . . she hadn’t hated it. After that, they’d gone out for dinner and then back to his hotel room to make love for hours.
She’d been so busy enjoying herself she hadn’t given a second thought to Sigmund and his neediness.
Now, guilt washed over her as she checked her phone and saw she had no messages from him except the one from Saturday night.
Sigmund: Congrats.
Well, the cat was out of the bag. She hoped he was just licking his wounds in private and would give her time and space. That . . . would be nice. Still, she had an uneasy feeling that it wasn’t the case. Taylor grabbed her laptop, settled it on her legs, and logged on to Excelsior. She really should have been spending more time in the game, but . . . being with Loch was so enticing. Maybe she could talk him into running his low-level toon through a few newbie dungeons. That would be fun.