With a watery smile, I imagined them doing exactly that, melting into my back. The weight of them dissipated, and when I glanced over my shoulder, I saw Noel smiling proudly through his tears.
“Good job.” He raked a hand through my hair. “But, seriously, how in Hades do you have wings?”
“Mercy and grace,” I said, and my angels shared matching looks of confusion. I waved it off with a shake of my head. “I saw Elysium. I saw my mother and Abram and Beau—” Emotion swelled my throat shut, and I cleared my throat. “I… there were two doors. I had the choice.”
Gideon took my hand, squeezing it just shy of too tight. “You sacrificed your soul for mine. You foolish boy.” I flinched at his harsh tone, but I didn’t cringe away when he caressed my cheek with his knuckles. “I’m going to be angry with you for a very long time.”
“Worth it,” I said. “I couldn’t let you die. I couldn’t let any of you die.”
“Fucking martyrs,” Noel griped, slipping his arms around my waist from behind. “We’re all a bunch of idiot martyrs.”
“I love you. All of you so much.” My tearful confession led to another messy hug, which ended in equally messy kisses. When we finally parted, I shook the remaining fog from my brain and looked around the battlefield. “What happened? Did we win?”
“I think so,” Noel said.
“I wasn’t paying attention,” Gideon said. “You know, with the whole dying, then not dying because you decided to die instead.”
Jai snorted. “Yeah, we were kind of busy trying to resuscitate your stupid ass.”
Had we not been surrounded by the carnage of war, I might have laughed. Instead, I offered a sad smile. “Like you would have done any different.”
“It’s not the same,” he grumbled.
“Sure it isn’t.” I rubbed my stomach as the last of my organs healed. “Getting stabbed sucks.”
“I could have told you that,” Jai scoffed.
I patted his cheek pityingly. “You do get stabbed the most out of all of us.”
He shrugged, turning his head to kiss my palm. “Comes with being a badass, I guess.”
“Riley may take your title,” Noel teased, chin digging into my shoulder. “I mean, he did destroy Lucifer, sacrifice his life for Gideon’s, and manage a resurrection. Pretty damn badass.”
Shaking my head, I leaned to the side and rested my forehead on Gideon’s chin. “Promise me we never have to do this again.”
“Gates of Hell, I hope not.” Gideon ruffled my damp curls.
I didn’t want to face what happened next, but when my angels helped me to my feet, I didn’t stop them. My stomach felt much better, but my leg was still weak, the muscles and flesh scooped out by Asmodeus’s claws struggling to grow back. My leg quivered as I put weight on it, but it thankfully didn’t buckle.
The sun’s rays bathed the grisly field in light, and a whole new level of grief smothered me. There were so many bodies—Fallen and Angel alike. Healers fanned out, rushing to the injured in hopes of preserving as much life as possible.
Limping along, I made my way through the bloodbath, my angels falling into step beside me. When we found a survivor, we did what we could to stabilize them until a healer arrived. It wasn’t always enough.
Noel sniffed as he closed Isaac’s mismatched eyes and placed a chaste kiss to the back of his cooling hand. “Until we meet again,” he said softly as Deborah cradled Isaac’s head in her lap, crying silent tears. Jael had fallen on the hill, or so Deborah said.
I recognized so many faces, empty eyes staring into nothing. Catherine, the Primary Guardian bonded with her two Secondaries, lay with her throat slashed open. Her Committeds, Cain and Abel, had fallen right next to her. Michael sat in the mire, cradling Adelle in his arms. She stared up at him in awe and terror as she bled out from a horrendous wound in her stomach. There were pieces of her everywhere.
“Abba?” she whispered.
“I’m so proud of you,” Michael said, petting her flaxen hair. “You fought so bravely. But now it’s time to rest. I’ll watch over you.”
I didn’t stay to witness her passing.
Mere feet away, Gideon collapsed to his knees beside a weeping Gabriel. Raphael was dead, tucked against Gabriel’s chest as the cruel Archangel sobbed into the heavens for his fallen brother. A tear tracked down Gideon’s cheek as he hesitantly placed a hand on Gabriel’s shoulder. Gabriel didn’t shrug him off.
I left them to mourn together.
Noel was helping bandage Xavier’s head, a large bloody splotch darkening the gauze where his eye should have been. Jai was moving bodies, searching for survivors who’d been buried beneath the dead. I wanted to help, but I was frozen. So much death.
When cold fingers circled my ankle and tugged, I cried out and stumbled away. Someone whimpered, and I pushed the fear aside and dropped to the ground. I shoved the dead weight of a corpse aside, revealing baby blue eyes and blood-soaked blond waves.
“Bel?” I grasped his flailing hand in mine and took inventory of his injuries. I swallowed bile when I saw gore-covered rib bones. “It’s gonna be okay,” I lied with a tearful smile. “You’re gonna be fine. I’m here.”
His eyes were wide and glazed. I wasn’t even sure he saw me, but his mouth twitched in an attempt at a smile. Every breath sounded painful, and I pressed the back of his hand to my cheek, nuzzling his chilled skin.
“You’re safe now, Bel. I got you,” I said, and his eyes finally found mine.
A gasp hitched in his chest. “F—F—Firecracker?” he wheezed, and I smiled.
“Yeah,” I lied again. “Yeah, it’s me.”
“I f—” He choked, spitting up blood, and I wiped it away with my sleeve. His throat clicked. He tried again. “I f-found you.”
“You found me,” I said as my tears spilled over anew.
Bel grinned, but he wasn’t looking at me anymore. His gaze was absent, staring right through me.
“Go to him.” I kissed the back of his hand and squeezed. “He’s waiting for you. Go to him, Bel.”
After several torturous breaths, Bel’s hand went slack, the light in his eyes snuffing out. His chest never rose again. I cried as I smoothed back his hair and pressed my lips to his forehead.
“Until we meet again,” I promised.
I found Uriel almost an hour later, sitting beside Delilah. Her blood had long dried, congealing around her throat and face. Uriel didn’t seem to see it. Braiding her hair, he mumbled to himself, humming under his breath every now and then.
“There you go,” he said as he finished yet another skinny braid. “You’re gonna look so beautiful for Obie. You’ll see, baby girl. He’ll go crazy. You know how he likes your hair in braids.”
His clothes were still singed, half of his body blackened. He hadn’t healed. Maybe he couldn’t. Maybe he simply wouldn’t. The left side of his face and neck were burned so badly I didn’t think he’d be able to heal it all away anymore. The damage was too deep.
But he didn’t seem bothered in the slightest. He just hummed under his breath, braiding Delilah’s hair, eyes open but not seeing. Delirious.