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Finally, it's lunchtime and I drop my tray down onto the table, already exhausted. The course work is so much harder than what I am used to and I constantly feel like I’m behind.
Nevermind the fact that I have either Barrett or Preston glowering at me in nearly every class, although I’m pretty sure it’s for two different reasons. While Preston is his usual pissy self, I’m pretty sure Barrett’s scowls have more to do with Neill than my father.
Even when I can’t see them, I can feel their glares burrowing into the back of my skull. It’s seriously fucking annoying, and I’m not the only one starting to notice. The Barbies have picked up on the fact the boy’s attention has been elsewhere recently, and they are making it clear they aren’t happy about it by calling me names, like slut, whore and bitch, when they walk past me in the hallways or when I pass their chairs in class. Their insults mean nothing to me but it’s still frustrating.
All hope of a quiet lunch, just listening to the girl’s gossip, is ruined when a hard body collapses into the chair beside me and drapes his arm over my shoulder.
“Hey babe,” Neill says casually, like we do this every day.
“Eh, what are you doing here?” I mutter quietly, trying to keep the conversation private. I don’t intend for the question to come out sounding rude but once I’ve said it I realise it does sound that way. “Don’t you usually sit with your friends at lunch?” I add, trying to make it sound less abrupt.
“Yeah, but today I thought I’d sit with you,” he says shrugging like it’s no big deal.
Not knowing what else to say, I just nod in agreement and tuck into my lunch. I’m not about to cause a scene here in the middle of the lunchroom.
He starts talking to me all about football, apparently he’s a wide receiver, whatever the hell that means. I just nod along with whatever he says, but honestly, I have no idea about American football. Or any type of football. It seems similar to rugby, but different somehow. Not that Neill seems to care, he’s happy enough to have an apparently engaging audience to listen to him drone on about it.
When the bell goes for the end of lunch, he grabs my lunch tray along with his own and puts them in the trash before grabbing my hand. “I’ll walk you to class,” he says smiling down at me.
“Oh, you don’t have to do that. I know how to get around the school by now,” I protest, appreciating his thoughtfulness but secretly hoping to get at least a few minutes to myself before my afternoon classes begin. I’m not used to having to interact with so many people during the school day and it’s way more exhausting than I thought it would be. Plus, I don’t know how to navigate this new…thing…with Neill.
Unfortunately, luck is not on my side today - not that it ever really seems to be - as Neill continues to smile at me, dragging me down the corridor towards my next class.
Once we reach the classroom door I turn to say thanks before heading inside, but apparently, he has other ideas. Instead, he pushes me up against the wall beside the door and looks at me with eyes full of dirty mischief.
“Don’t I get a thank you kiss, or even a goodbye kiss, before you leave me?” He asks all flirtatiously, full of boy next door charm.
If I was any other girl he would have me hook, line and sinker. I would be an absolute sucker for him. As it is, he’s just starting to annoy me, although I can’t deny it's nice having someone who wants to spend time with me and wants my attention.
I’ve never had that before, and honestly, it’s nice to feel wanted for a change. I’ve gotten so used to feeling unwanted, hated, to being on the defensive, since I arrived here, that I hadn’t realised I have been slowly drowning in these negative emotions. I tell myself that that’s the reason why I lean forwards and capture his lips in what I intend to be a chaste kiss.
Instead, Neill takes over and starts to consume me, licking along the seam of my mouth, causing my lips to part so he can shove his tongue inside, while his thigh slips between mine, causing my skirt to ride up to an indecent level. He’s not a bad kisser. I’d even say he’s a decent kisser, but I can’t help comparing him to Barrett, and damn he does nothing for me in comparison.
Where Barrett caused my brain to malfunction and had every nerve in my body responding to his touch and screaming for more, Neill doesn’t elicit any of that.
I’ve just placed my hands on his chest, pushing him back when someone coughs loudly beside us. The rest of the class has taken their seats already, and the teacher is standing in the doorway scowling at us.
“Whenever you are ready to come in Miss Montgomery, the rest of us are waiting to begin,” he states flatly, unamused with our disruption.
Fighting a blush, I mutter an apology to the teacher as I duck under Neill's arm, taking my seat as quickly as possible while the rest of the students snicker around me. Once again, I feel Barrett’s glare from behind me drilling holes into the back of my head, but I deliberately don’t look his way.
The week continues on in much the same fashion. Neill sits at our table every day and talks to me and the other girls, laughing and joking along. While I am still not sure about his intentions, I’ve come to accept it and even enjoy it in some strange way.
I can’t deny it feels nice when he puts his arm around me and pulls me into his side, or when he looks over at me and gives me that gorgeous smile of his, as though it's only for me and we’re sharing some sort of secret. It’s not something I have ever had before, or ever thought I would have. While I know it isn’t real, because my feelings for him aren’t real, I often find myself ignoring that little voice in my head that says this isn’t fair on him, or myself, in favour of holding on to these moments for a little longer.
Chapter 23
The weeks go by and before I know it, it’s nearly Thanksgiving. Not a holiday I have ever celebrated before, but a holiday that is apparently done with a lot of fanfare in America, or well in Crescentwood anyway.
There are autumnal themed decorations everywhere in town and in the gardens of the passing mansions, and the crisp feeling of the change of seasons in the air. I can’t help but relish in it. I have always loved autumn, when the leaves change colour and paint the trees and surrounding land in burnt oranges and reds, but living somewhere with so much forestry and a lot less rain than Northern Ireland means the colours are so much more vibrant and rich than back home, and I can actually go out for walks amongst the trees and nature to enjoy the changing of the season.
Thankfully, things have been pretty steady recently. Preston and Barrett seem to have backed off for now and I’ve settled into a routine with Alexis and the girls, and even with Neill. I also haven’t had much interaction with Robert, although with the holidays looming, I’m sure that’s about to change.
I would almost go as far as to say things are good right now. There’s a familiarity to the routine and a sense of belonging that I never thought I would feel. We all went to a party together at the weekend and it was the first time since arriving here that I let my guard down and let loose. I had a few drinks, danced and laughed with the girls, made out with Neill and, surprisingly, I had fun.