“You would never hurt me.” Diana had clung to this belief from the beginning of their relationship. It was time to tell her the truth.
“Eleanor thought that—once. Then I killed her in a moment of madness and jealousy. Jack’s not the only vampire in this family whose blood rage is set off by love and loyalty.” Matthew met his wife’s eyes. “So is mine.”
“And you and Eleanor were merely lovers. We’re mates.” Diana’s expression revealed her dawning understanding. “All along you’ve said I shouldn’t trust you. You swore you would kill me yourself before you let anyone else touch me.”
“I told you the truth.” Matthew’s fingertips traced the line of Diana’s cheekbone, sweeping up to catch the tear that threatened to fall from the corner of her eye.
“But not the whole truth. Why didn’t you tell me that our mating bond was going to make your blood rage worse?” Diana cried.
“I thought I could find a cure. Until then, I thought I could manage my feelings,” Matthew replied. “But you have become as vital to me as breath and blood. My heart no longer knows where I end and you begin. I knew that you were a powerful witch from the moment I saw you, but how could I have imagined that you would have so much power over me?”
Diana answered him not with words but with a kiss that was startling in its intensity. Matthew’s response matched it. When they drew apart they were both shaken. Diana touched her lips with trembling fingers. Matthew rested his head atop hers, his heart—her heart—thudding with emotion.
“Founding a new scion will require my complete attention, as well as complete control,” Matthew said when at last he was able to speak. “If I succeed—”
“You must,” Diana said firmly. “You will.”
“Very well, ma lionne. When I succeed, there will still be times when I’ll have to handle matters on my own,” Matthew explained. “It isn’t that I distrust you, but I cannot trust myself.”
“Like you’ve handled Jack,” Diana said. Matthew nodded.
“Being apart from you will be a living hell, but being distracted would be unspeakably dangerous. As for my control . . . well, I think we know just how little I have when you are around.” He brushed her lips with another kiss, this one seductive. Diana’s cheeks reddened.
“What will I do while you’re in New Orleans?” Diana asked. “There must be some way I can help you.”
“Find that missing page from Ashmole 782,” Matthew replied. “We’ll need the Book of Life for leverage—no matter what happens between me and Marcus’s children.” The fact that the search would keep Diana from being directly involved in the disaster should this harebrained scheme fail was an added benefit. “Phoebe will help you look for the third illumination. Go to Sept-Tours. Wait there for me.”
“How will I know you’re all right?” Diana asked. The reality of their impending separation was beginning to sink in.
“I’ll find a way. But no phone calls. No e-mails. We can’t leave a trail of evidence for the Congregation to follow if Baldwin—or one of my own blood—turns me in,” Matthew said. “You have to remain in his good graces, at least until you are recognized as a de Clermont.”
“But that’s months away!” Diana’s expression turned desperate. “What if the children are born early?”
“Marthe and Sarah will deliver them,” he said gently. “There’s no telling how long this will take, Diana.” It could be years, Matthew thought.
“How will I make the children understand why their father isn’t with them?” she asked, somehow hearing his unspoken words.
“You will tell the twins I had to stay away because I loved them—and their mother—with all my heart.” Matthew’s voice broke. He pulled her into his arms, holding her as though that might delay her inevitable departure.
“Matthew?” The familiar voice came out of the darkness.
“Marcus?” Diana had not heard his approach, though Matthew had picked up first his scent and then the soft sound of his son’s footsteps as he climbed the mountain.
“Hello, Diana.” Marcus stepped out of the shadows and into a patch of moonlight.
She frowned with concern. “Is something wrong at Sept-Tours?”
“Everything in France is fine. I thought Matthew needed me here,” Marcus said.
“And Phoebe?” Diana asked.
“With Alain and Marthe.” Marcus sounded tired. “I couldn’t help but overhear your plans. There will be no turning back once we put them in motion. Are you sure about forming a scion, Matthew?”
“No,” Matthew said, unable to lie. “But Diana is.” He looked at his wife. “Chris and Gallowglass are waiting for you down the path. Go now, mon coeur.”
“This minute?” For a moment Diana looked frightened at the enormity of what they were about to do.
“It will never be any easier. You’re going to have to walk away from me. Don’t look back. And for God’s sake don’t run.” Matthew would never be able to control himself if she did.
“But—” Diana pressed her lips together. She nodded and dashed the back of her hand against her cheek, brushing away sudden tears.
Matthew put more than a thousand years of longing into one last kiss.
“I’ll never—” Diana began.
“Hush.” He silenced her with another touch of his lips. “No nevers for us, remember?”
Matthew set her away from him. It was only a few inches, but it might have been a thousand leagues. As soon as he did, his blood howled. He turned her so she could see the two faint circles of light from their friends’ flashlights.
“Don’t make this harder on him,” Marcus told Diana softly. “Go now. Slowly.”
For a few seconds, Matthew wasn’t sure she would be able to do it. He could see the gold and silver threads hanging from her fingertips, sparking and shimmering as if trying to fuse together something that had been suddenly, horribly broken. She took a tentative step. Then another. Matthew saw the muscles in her back trembling as she struggled to keep her composure. Her head dropped. Then she squared her shoulders and slowly walked in the opposite direction.
“I knew from the goddamn beginning you were going to break her heart,” Chris called to Matthew when she reached him. He drew Diana into his arms.
But it was Matthew’s heart that was breaking, taking with it his composure, his sanity, and his last traces of humanity.
Marcus watched him without blinking as Gallowglass and Chris led Diana away. When they disappeared from sight, Matthew leaped forward. Marcus caught him.