“It’s been a long day for me,” I say honestly, putting a shaky hand to my forehead and rubbing it. Seeing my hand tremble, I bring it down, putting it in my other one and watching them both shake now.
Trey notices my hands; his eyebrows come together as he watches them. “It will be even longer tomorrow,” he says softly. “We should all try to sleep now.” Jax and Wayra both rummage through their packs, coming out with bedrolls.
“Here,” Jax says, handing me a bedroll. Jax spreads his out where he had been sitting, perpendicular to the tree so that if he rolls in his sleep, he won’t roll off the edge. I spread mine next to his and see a small smile form in the corners of his mouth.
Trey spreads his bedroll next to mine so that I’m between them. Trying to ignore them, I lie down on the blanket, resting my head on the pillow. I close my eyes and take a few deep breaths as I attempt to slow my racing heart. It takes me a second to figure out that what I find the most frightening in this moment is the silence. I’m lost in it. No horn honks or sirens or passing El trains disturb the night. No trace of my home exists here.
As I hold back tears that threaten to slip from beneath my closed eyelids, a thought occurs to me: They were real. My parents weren’t just some made up dream that I conjured late at night in my bed, in the dark. My sketchy memories of them are real. Piercing elation crashes into and vies with crushing grief. I find it hard to breathe. There are people in Rafe and Alameeda who know a lot more about them. I can find out the truth. I can finally know who my parents were. But at what cost? I wonder.
My body is weary, but sleep eludes me. I open my eyes and gaze at Trey next to me. He has his arms crossed behind his head as he stares up at the brilliant stars in the clear, night sky. He seems almost ethereal, bathed as he is in the bluish glow of the light stick. The warmth I felt earlier comes back, slipping through me and filling me with another kind of glow that calms my fear. Feeling his radiating body heat, my breathing slows. He’s too perfect looking to be real. This has to be a dream after all. With that thought, I relax enough to sleep.
CHAPTER 7
WITH EVERY MISTAKE
Curled on my side, my fingertips glide softly over warm, supple contours on their way to my face. Tucking my hair back from my eyes, I open them, focusing on the thick, inky line of Trey’s tattoo. My fingers return to rest on Trey’s chest again, and then I still, suddenly wide-awake. I cringe, seeing that I’m snuggled up against Trey’s warm body like he’s an oversized teddy bear. My head is just below his chin and his arm is resting on my hip as we’re turned toward each other like…lovers.
Stiffening, I close my eyes, mouthing the words “holy shit” before trying to ease back a little from Trey. Inhaling a breath, I smell his scent all around me. My eyes fly open again as a pulse of desire shivers through me. It surprises me and makes me want to hide from him. I have to quell my impulse to run. Instead, I ease my hand off of Trey’s chest, trying really hard not to wake him as I begin to roll away.
“Where are you going, Kricket?” Trey whispers softly, opening his eyes and watching me freeze like a criminal.
“Uh—nowhere—um, bathroom?” I ask, my heart pounding like I did something wrong. Feeling my face flushing as I move back to my blanket, I see now that I had invaded his space, not he mine.
“There are personal totes in Jax’s gear. Take one with you. Come back when you’re finished. We’re going to rest until the sun is fully up,” I nod, not meeting his eyes. Hurrying over to find a tote bag of toiletries, I take one with me around the bend of the tree.
Closing my eyes and leaning against the trunk, I fight the urge to completely fall apart. I’m still here in freakin’ Etharian Hell, I think. I’d been hoping that this was all some weird delusion that would go away in the morning, but it’s definitely real because I can smell Trey all over me.
My hair tickles my nose; I inhale, feeling another twinge of desire tear through me at Trey’s scent. “Ugh,” I groan. “What’s wrong with you? He’s the enemy…and he’s completely old!”
Taking my time because I’m in no hurry to go back to my blanket, I use all the toiletries in the bag. I carefully wash my body before combing out my hair. After braiding it in one, thick plait, I tie it with a leather string I find in the bag.
Chewing on one of those minty leaves, I creep back around the tree to my blanket. None of the guys have moved an inch. Wayra is snoring softly on his blanket as I step around Jax. I sit down before lying back and staring up at the leafy canopy above my head.
“I thought I was going to have to come and find you,” Trey murmurs next to me, making me jump at the sound of his voice.
“Oh?” I ask, not looking at him.
“You took your time.”
“I wasn’t aware that it was a timed test,” I shoot back, glancing at him and seeing the corners of his mouth tip up at my response.
“Do you always rise so early?”
“Do you always sleep so late?”
“Days are longer here. There are thirty-two parts in a rotation. You’re probably used to Earth time,” he surmises, stretching his long arms. “The transition will be brutal for you. You’re going to want to sleep when you should be awake and be awake when you should sleep.”
“So…noon is at…sixteen o’clock?” I ask, feeling my heartbeat pick up.
“Yes,” he grins, showing his perfect teeth.
“Eight more hours in a full day?”
“That’s right,” he replies. “But, we call it a ‘rotation’ not a ‘day.’”
“How long will it take to adapt to the time change?”
“That depends on you. How adaptable are you?” His eyebrow rises.
“I’m a chameleon,” I reply in a clipped tone, looking straight up at the leaves above. “I’ll survive.”
“Really?” he asks with surprise in his tone.
“Yes.” I nod once.
“All alone?”
“Yes.”
“It will take a very hard, very determined personality to survive what is ahead for you without help.”
“Got it,” I growl through clenched teeth, anger flaring up in me at the sympathy in his voice.
“You’re tough?”
“I’m stone.”
“Stone can be broken.”
Tilting my head toward him, I meet his eyes. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. I’m used to holding on to nothing as tight as I can.”
Wayra snorts irritably from his position on his blanket. “Ah, you gotta stop talking, because she’s breaking my heart!” He sits up and glowers at Jax next to me. “Okay, we’ll hire her a wigg, but that’s it! After that, I’m out.”
I frown. “I don’t need your charity. If you want to help me, then let me go home,” I say softly, not sure of what they’re talking about, but fairly certain that it’s charity.
“We are taking you home, Kricket,” Trey says. “Ethar is your home. You should know that by the way they abused you on their planet,” he says, looking angry all of a sudden.
“It wasn’t all bad,” I mutter, defending my home. “I had friends there…friends that are probably worried about me now.” I begin to panic as I think about Bridget and what she’ll do when she finds out I’m gone. Maybe she’ll move in with Eric and he’ll take care of her, I think. Enrique will be okay. He’ll miss me, but he has a huge family and maybe Michael will help him.