“I know.” I glanced out the window. It was dark. Middle-of-the-night dark. About to storm. Annie and I needed to leave before the Guild decided I couldn’t.
“You could stay. I mean, Mom and Dad would want us to stick together.” Laura ran out of steam and hugged me instead. “Oh, hell. Don’t forget us, okay? I expect postcards, not just emails, promise?”
“I promise,” I said just as Annie came in.
She stopped short when she saw us. “Oh, I will come back.”
We pulled apart and said, “No, it’s okay” at the same time.
“Don’t you forget us either,” Laura said to Annie.
“That would be impossible,” Annie said. I watched her eyes play along my desk and make their way to the burned circles. It felt like Tristan was still somehow here.
“I’m a jerk for missing him,” I admitted.
Annie came up along one side of me and Laura the other. “Somehow, I will make sure his name will not be forgotten,” Annie said. “Everyone will know he wrote the Prelude. What there is of it anyhow.”
I sighed. There was nothing left to say. We all understood what we’d lost.
My phone buzzed with a text from Russ. Come down. I’m outside.
It was 2:00 a.m. I wasn’t sure how to face Russ. My plan had been to call him from the road. Annie and I were going to head to Buchanan, and she was going to buy a ticket out of the machine for each of us on the morning train to the city. With any luck, we’d never see Russ’s dad.
Of course, Russ knew I was leaving, just like Russ knew every other major event in my life. Our friendship had changed, but I guessed some things stayed the same.
“Go,” Annie said. “I’ll bring the bags down.”
I nodded and made my way down the stairs.
* * *
It was odd not knowing what to say to your best friend. For a minute, we kind of stood there, looking at each other like we’d never met. I tried to commit this Russ to memory: worn, unseasonal coat, dyed hair, the way he stood, spring-loaded, looking like he was prepared to fight.
I wondered what Russ saw when he looked at me. Just a guy who couldn’t wait to get the hell out of town, probably.
“Look, about Ian…” I said. I wanted to get the whole topic out of the way before I had to figure out the right words to make saying goodbye to Russ not hurt like hell.
Russ shuffled slightly.
“I just wanted to say that I’m sorry I gave you a hard time. You don’t owe me an explanation.” There wasn’t much I could leave Russ with. This felt like all I had to offer.
He turned and took two steps away. Then a third. Then he turned back, his face betraying all the emotions he usually kept hidden. “I think I do, actually. I owe you that,” Russ said, voice low. “He’s helping me. With the Guild and with…everything.”
Muscle memory almost made me remind Russ that Ian was a manipulative jerk, an egomaniac, a ghost. But Russ knew all of that. And really, who was I to tell anyone else what to do?
“You’ll be careful, right?” I said. “I mean, just remember he’s a ghost, and you know what they’re like.”
“I’m not sure there’s all that much difference between live Ian and dead Ian.” Russ flushed, and for some reason that made me so uncomfortable, I had to look away. “The funny thing is, I’m not sure I care.”
Now I had no choice but to glance back. Russ looked odd. Almost happy. That was it. Oddly happy. For years, I’d fought against his friendship—or whatever it was—with Ian. That had always felt justified. But what if?
“You and Ian?” I asked, already guessing the answer.
Russ couldn’t hide a hint of a grin. “I’m still wrapping my head around it. Look, there’s something else,” Russ said. He flipped up the collar of his jacket, revealing a Guild pin. “I got in. I’m going to be Student Leader this year.”
Russ’s success with the Guild certainly wasn’t a surprise. It had never been a matter of if, just when. “Congrats. But promise you’ll be careful with that too?”
Russ nodded and his shoulders relaxed. We wouldn’t fight tonight. That was good. Then Russ reached around into his bag and pulled out a manila envelope. “And I brought you something.”
I reached out for the lumpy envelope, which was heavier than it looked. “You didn’t need to get me a card,” I said, turning it over in my hands. “I know you love me.”
Russ swallowed hard and pasted a sort-of smile on his face. “Maybe you have more ability than you thought.”
I breathed out, feeling more relieved than I had in a long, long time. “I think I’ll leave that to you from now on, actually.”
We both stared at the envelope in my hand. I pulled the red tab and dumped the contents out into my hand; a jumble of metal and plastic.
It was impossible.
“No,” I said. “You are not giving me the car.”
Russ tapped his firm stomach. “You know, I need to take a couple of pounds off. Walking is sounding like a good idea.”
“I’m not. I can’t,” I protested. “What about the Guild? I’m sure part of asking you to work with them was…” I stopped myself. “How many rules do you think this breaks?”
“At least six that I can think of off the top of my head.”
I spun around. I’d bet it was breaking at eight at minimum. The car wasn’t just a product; it was a product of St. Hilaire. And if the rumors about the car’s DNA were to be believed, stolen goods were the least of it. The Guild revered the car as if it was the town mascot. They weren’t going to let it just drive out of town. But then they weren’t going to be happy I was leaving either.
Perhaps it made sense. The car and I were both going to be on the run from the Guild.
“And what about Ian?” I asked.
“Actually, it was his idea, and Ian can be very persuasive.”
I resisted sharing any of the snarky comments that came to mind and thrust the keys back in Russ’s direction. “I can’t take them.”
Russ linked his fingers together and took a step backward, leaving the keys hanging in my hand like a bunch of grapes. “I’m going to miss you, Dec. Really. But you need to get going.” He pointed at the keys. “Your future awaits.”
Russ was right. He was always right about these things.
“Sure you don’t want to join me?” I asked.
Russ looked away and for a minute, I thought he’d say yes. But then he said, “What do you think I’m going to do, get a real job? I’d rather not. Thanks.”