"How do we know she can be trusted?" Queen Mariam asked her son, a sharp look in her violet eyes as they cut toward Cassi. "All we know about her is that she came with the princess. A bird without a flock can be a dangerous thing."
"Mother." Xander sighed with a heaviness Cassi felt to her bones. "If she wanted to kill me, she's had ample opportunity. She's given us no reason not to trust her."
I'd be a terrible spy if I had, she thought, stifling her frown. His was the worst sort of reasoning, foolish and naïve, and if they were alone, she would have throttled him. Yet part of her envied his infallible ability to see the good even in a viper about to strike. I'll have to add this to the long list of things to teach him.
"Put it away, Dimos," Xander ordered again, a bit more forcefully this time. The guard glanced between his prince and his queen, then slowly sheathed his weapon. Xander shifted his attention to Cassi. "Did you catch him?"
She licked her lips and swallowed.
If she were a good person, like Xander, maybe she'd offer him the truth—explain the prophecy, the war, and the civilization surviving beneath the mist. He would understand, she was sure. He would do the right thing. He'd try to help her, and Malek and Lyana and everyone fighting to see the dragons undone.
But she wasn't a good person.
She was a liar.
It was the only thing she knew how to do.
"No." The word came out as more breath than voice. "No, I didn’t catch him."
Xander's disappointment was swift, his shoulders falling, his expression too. There wasn't an ounce of doubt anywhere on his face. He believed her. He trusted her. Just as Rafe had. Just as Lyana did. Deceit came more naturally to her than breathing. Malek would have called it a skill, but to Cassi it was a curse, something she couldn’t stop, didn’t know how to end, almost hoped would be caught.
"Did you see him? Was he a raven? What did he look like?"
"I never saw his face, but yes, he was a raven, wings as black as the night. That's how he got away. He flew over the edge, and I lost him in the shadows of the cliffs. I don't know where he went after that."
Xander nodded, taking her at her word.
She wished he wouldn't.
"Very well." He shared a look with his mother laced with unspoken meaning, then turned to the guard. "Dimos, get Helen and tell her to come here immediately. She can send a team to search the cliffs without her. Understood?"
"Yes, my prince."
"Good. Go. Cassi—"
"I'll just get out of your way."
"You're not—"
"It's all right, Xander. The game of politics isn’t for me, and there's a bath somewhere in this castle with my name on it. Whatever you and your advisors decide, and whatever it means for me, will be fine."
"If that's what you'd like."
She turned toward the door, spotting the book she’d dropped near the entrance still open on the floor. Taking a moment to retrieve it, she carefully smoothed out the pages and folded it closed before handing it back to Xander. "I was just coming earlier to return this to you."
"Did you finish it?" He took the book from her hands, swallowing as their fingers touched. Queen Mariam quietly studied his reaction while Cassi nodded. "And? What did you think about the ending?"
"She gave up everything to be with him. Her tail. Her home. Her people. The very essence of herself."
"She gave it all in the name of love."
"And what did he give up?"
Xander tilted his head to the side, brows pinching together.
"He still had his wings, his sky, his home," Cassi continued. "Why did Nyara have to surrender everything and Tassos nothing? Why must women always be the ones to sacrifice for men? What's romantic about that?"
"I—" He paused. "I never thought about it like that."
Cassi laughed softly, unable to stop herself, though her anger was with a very different man somewhere far beneath the mist, who still had his magic and his kingdom and his queen, while she was lost in the aftermath. "Why would you?"
The queen caught her eyes as she turned away, a curious spark igniting, but Cassi ignored it and kept walking. The last thing she needed was that spiteful raven as a kindred spirit—two women torn apart by love. No, her story wasn't over yet, and she was determined to write a different ending from the one her king had planned.
Tragedy just doesn't suit me.
Her lips curled into a grin as she made for her room, longing to lose herself in a tub of steaming water. She hadn't been lying about the bath. Her muscles ached and she needed time to think before she released the magic gathering beneath her skin. Malek would get his visit. There was no doubt about that. But first, she needed a plan—some way to convince her king that a decent, kind-hearted man like Xander was anything except a liability.
16
Xander
Her words lingered long after she left, while the healer finished dressing his wounds and his mother looked on with concern. The fire crackled, breaking up the silence.
Who had she loved?
What had she sacrificed?
Xander didn't doubt the venom in her voice had come from experience, but what? And when? And perhaps more importantly, why did it matter? A dangerous emotion crept its way up his right arm, like a spider crawling out of hiding, breaking free of the tight hold he kept on all those unpleasant feelings he didn’t want to face. Anger on her behalf. Anger at himself. Logically, he knew she couldn't possibly have been talking about him, and yet, he couldn't help but wonder. Lyana had been prepared to give up everything for him and for his people—her freedom, her dreams, her heart. In return, Xander would have gotten everything he'd ever wanted. A worthy queen. A loyal mate. A hopeful future. All the while, Cassi had lurked in the periphery, watching the scene unfold.
Was that what she thought of him?
Worse still, was she right?
"I'm not sure I approve of how much time you’re spending with that owl," his mother murmured as soon as the healer left.
He eased his shirt back over his shoulders and around his wings, wincing at the dull ache in his side. "I'm not sure I care."
"Lysander."
"Mother."
"What is she still doing in our home?"
"She's helping me find Lyana."
"How?"
"She's— She's—" In truth, aside from tossing him up against walls and stopping by to steal books from his library, Cassi wasn't offering much assistance. But then again, what else could she do? He didn’t even know where to begin the search, so how could she? "She just is. And besides, we couldn't very well let her leave. The doves would know something was amiss the second she stepped foot on their isle, and the whole ruse would be undone."
The queen tsked.
Xander was saved by the sound of the door opening behind him. Helen strode into the room, a grim look on her face. "My prince."
"We need to discuss our next course of action."
"I agree."
"Cassi lost track of the assailant, but she says he was a raven. She's sure."