His aging features sagged. “Are you sure…” He clasped and unclasped his hands. “I know he can be, well, difficult. Even…harsh. But maybe if…”
She stood up, dropping her brutalized block of wood. “I told you,” she felt her nails digging into her palms, eyes stinging again, “I can’t.”
Grrake got up too, forehead creased with apparent grief. At first she thought he would try again, would ask her to just give Yhkon another chance…but he didn’t. He only hung his head and walked away. That was almost worse.
When she tiredly sat back down and returned to whittling, wishing she could so easily make it appear as though nothing had happened, Ahjul tentatively asked if she was alright. All she could muster was an unconvincing nod. She could tell he almost asked what had happened, multiple times, but he never did. Terindi didn’t say a word, though her pale eyes sought Talea’s with empathy and concern. Talea hoped they knew she was grateful. They all went back to whittling, silent at first, before eventually Ahjul started some light and sporadic conversation, that required very little investment on her part and was simply calming.
The calm didn’t last for long.
“Everyone up,” came Yhkon’s voice. “We’re doing some training. Talea,” he addressed her without so much as a glance, “you can begin the supper preparations. Also brush Eclipse, if you please.”
Everyone looked to him, than her. It was all too blatant. He never refused the opportunity to train to one of the wards, and he almost never asked one of them to take on the task of supper without any assistance. Since he stood there waiting, however, none of them had any choice but to do as told or risk his wrath.
With sympathetic looks, Ahjul and Terindi left. Grrake went to Yhkon and whispered something to him. The mocking reply was not whispered. “Oh, were you elected to replace me as lead Warden in my absence? No? Then I think it’s my word that stands.”
Talea felt a new sort of heat in her blood. No tears. No remorse, no desire for amends. It had only been a few minutes ago that she had been wishing Grrake would leave her alone…but she would never so viciously abuse and humiliate him. None of them would. Only Yhkon would do that. And not even blink at the heartbroken flinch from the older Warden that resulted.
She stood up with fury hot in her cheeks. While everyone else began their training, Yhkon acting as an unnecessary supervisor, she set to her assigned chores. Gather wood, start a fire. Wrangle together the ingredients for a simple stew, all in a large pot to simmer over the flames. While it warmed, she found a comb and set to work on Eclipse’s sleek hide, brushing until not a fleck of dirt remained, nor a single hair out of place. Since the stew still wasn’t ready by the time she finished, she brushed Lenjeya, then Ahjul’s celith.
The meal was a silent, awkward affair, with little said beyond Yhkon’s declaration that they would continue training afterward. Since he didn’t give Talea any separate orders, it was probably his intent to train with her, as well.
It was not her intent to train with him.
She did more than her fair share of cleaning up after dinner. But the moment the wards started dispersing to their Wardens, she practically darted to where Resh was sharpening a knife. “Resh, Ahjul says you’re the best at hand-to-hand combat, of all the Wardens. Would you train with me tonight? I’m sure Yhkon won’t mind.”
Even if Resh made no particular display of it, they both knew that Yhkon would mind. Thankfully, though, he only grinned. “Ahjul tells the truth. Come on, let’s find a spot with some room.”
Letting Resh teach her hand-to-hand, with all the close-up interaction it required, would perhaps have been uncomfortable under different circumstances. As things were, she was happy to let him take her in a pretend choke hold, or guide her hands with his own through maneuvers, because seething jealousy was written all over Yhkon’s face even as he pretended not to notice. Besides, Resh was a surprisingly pleasant and helpful teacher. More so than Yhkon, who was often too detached or moody to put in much effort.
By the time night had fallen and they all went to bed, it had been hours since she had even spoken to the lead Warden. The longer she could keep it that way, the better.
The Wardens let them sleep late the next morning. No one had anywhere to be until after noon, anyway. After breakfast had been cleared away, Talea knew it wouldn’t be long before Yhkon ordered more training. Resh and Gustor were going hunting, meaning she would have no choice but to train with Yhkon.
She sprinted to catch up with the leaving Wardens. “Hey, um, could I tag along, maybe?”
After looking at her with raised eyebrows, they exchanged a thoughtful look between them. “Think he’ll flay our hides for it?” Resh asked.
Gustor shrugged. “He can try,” was all he said, before continuing into the forest. Taking that and Resh’s smile as permission, she trailed behind them.
They stayed out for three hours. She suspected Gustor and Resh were keeping her—and themselves, for that matter—away from Yhkon as long as possible. She was no help to their hunting, having almost no practice with a bow, but she had at least mastered stealth well enough to not impede them. There was almost no conversation. It was a welcome silence.
When they finally returned to camp, Gustor and Resh sent her ahead with the game while they dealt with Yhkon. She could hear his angry voice, even if she couldn’t make out the words. Gustor and Resh, as far as she could tell, didn’t reply at all. They just let him rant.
He didn’t say a word to Talea.
While he was saddling Eclipse for the imminent trip, Talea steeled herself and approached Grrake where he sat, doing nothing. His shoulders were stooped, movements sluggish. Seeing her, his eyes became all the more forlorn. “I’m sorry, Talea, for whatever he said or did. I really am.”
Releasing the breath she’d been holding, she sat down next to him. “It’s not your fault, and I’m sorry for how I acted yesterday. You didn’t deserve that. But…I have a favor to ask.”
He looked up, almost eagerly, waiting.
“I…I was hoping you might come with us.” She rubbed her thumb up and down her index finger. “If he and I argue again, it won’t be a good first impression for Skyve’s parents, and anyway I…well, I can ride with Resh there but if Skyve comes back I couldn’t…and I just…”
Grrake was nodding, almost with relief. “You’re right. Of course. I’ll come, and you can ride with me both ways. I’ll go tell him.”
Talea observed the encounter anxiously, far enough that she couldn’t hear what was said. Yhkon’s irritation was still evident. Why should it bother him? Surely he had no more desire to share a saddle with her than she had. It wasn’t a long discussion, however. Grrake came back and said only that he was coming, and they’d best get ready.
Unlike that of the earlier hunting trip, the silence of the ride to Fesdor was unbearable. Though she hadn’t even been given specific instructions, the moment the celiths were stopped, she dismounted and walked alone toward the town, unwilling to breach the silence and ask. Let alone ask Yhkon.
A light drizzle that had started shortly after they set out became a downpour as she reached Skyve’s home. Picking a strand of wet hair from her cheek, she knocked on the door and waited, fidgeting. The maid answered, letting her in and leading her into the library.