“Okay, so you think your essence is transforming me into a banshee?”
‘Transforming’ wasn’t the best word, but it was a hell of a lot better than ‘mutated’.
“Yes.”
Before I could react to this revelation, there was a knock at the door. Ian rose to answer it and I went out on the balcony. I leaned forward, elbows on the railing and my head in my hands.
“How you holding up, my pip?” Bryce asked from beside me.
“I’m becoming banshee.”
“I concur,” he said matter-of-factly.
Anxiety blossomed at his straight-forward acknowledgment. There was no holding it back, no calming it down, it had taken over and I could only ride it out and hope for the best. Of course, that didn’t happen. Instead, I lost my mind.
“What? How are you so calm? Your niece is becoming a banshee. The things you taught me to kill. The things you taught me to hate! I will become a soul-sucking banshee!” I was pacing and using my hands as I spoke, and I smacked him in the face when I spun. “Oh! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to hit you.”
“I’m fine,” he said so tersely that I took a step away from him. “Let me set things straight, because you evidently have some misconceptions in that stubborn head of yours. I taught you to defend yourself against immoral banshees. I most certainly never taught you to hate anyone. Any hate you have is your own doing, not mine,” he said. “I never thought it possible, but you’ve disappointed me tonight. I raised you better than this. Act like it.” And with that he turned and left.
His words and the distress in his voice snapped me out of my panicked fog, and what I’d done hit me like a slap in the face.
“Shit,” I said under my breath. Nauseated, I stepped back into the room. “Ian?” I asked. He was standing in front of the fire with his back to me, his hands clenched in fists at his side.
“Ian,” I said again, placing my hand on his arm to turn him to face me.
He looked at me, his eyes roaming over my face. “Things? Soul-sucking,” he whispered as he shook his head, and my gut clenched. He pulled out of my grasp. “I will let you get some rest.”
I wanted to make him stay, but how could I ask him? He’d heard what I said to Bryce. I had no right to ask him to stay.
“I’m sorry,” I said to his back as he stepped into the hallway.
I sat on the sofa and stared into the flames, half hoping they’d give me the answers. I reclined back and closed my eyes and thought about what I knew so far. Regardless of how sure my uncle and Ian were, no one knew for sure what would happen if I continued to take banshee essence. But I knew how I felt. I felt changes I’d refused to acknowledge until now. I really was becoming banshee.
Each time I’d accepted banshee power or blood, the results became stronger and more powerful. I had lost my appetite, but hadn’t lost any weight; in fact, I’d gained muscle. I was healing faster than usual. I was becoming faster and less clumsy, and I felt healthier and more alert.
“Wait… So, why am I upset?” I asked myself out loud.
I was becoming banshee. Period.
Instinctively, I knew my mortal half was gone. I barely sensed my fairy blood, but I would need more essence to become full-banshee.
“Looks like you’ve made your decision,” I said to myself. “Now I just have to get Ian to forgive my stupidity… and give me one more hit of his banshee-ness.”
A knock at the door put an end to my thoughts. Standing, I faced the door, hoping it was Ian.
“Yes?”
To my surprise Seth stepped in and closed the door behind him. “I just spoke to Ian.” His voice was hard to match the look on his face.
“I can explain—”
“No need,” Seth said. “I know you and know you didn’t think before you said those things. I also know that you didn’t mean what you said. I tried explaining it to him, but he won’t listen to reason.”
“After everything we’ve been through, all that’s happened, he can just dismiss it because I made a stupid, thoughtless comment?”
“That comment was pretty harsh. It’s possible he’s wondering why after everything you’ve been through, how you could be so disgusted by becoming one of us.”
“Shit.” I had told Ian I accept him for who he is, then I go an insult what he is. I had to learn how to think before reacting.
“Yeah… My opinion, though? He’s scared of being so close to you. He hasn’t been with anyone for a long time, and his feelings for you must frighten him. Anyway, he didn’t say where he is going, but he said he’s no longer staying here.”
“Gabriel may have spies watching us. Ian will be out there alone, I need to go after him.”
“He’ll be fine. If you go, you’ll be in more danger than he is. You’re staying here. He sent me to make sure of it.” His lips twitching into a smirk. “I’ll sit on you if I have to.”
“Bastard,” I said with no real heat behind it. Ian sent Seth to keep me safe, so that had to mean there was hope he could forgive me.
“Don’t go after him, Kadi,” Seth said.
I blinked slowly, not wanting to lie to him. He sighed and his shoulders slumped in acceptance, or defeat. I don’t know which, but it didn’t matter. He knew as soon as I could, I’d leave.
There was only one place I could think he’d go, and that’s where I’d go… as soon as I got away from Seth.
“You know I can’t promise you that. I’ll feel better if you just let me go. I’d hate to sneak behind your back, but I will.”
“Are you going to let him turn you?”
That was so not what I expected. “I didn’t even know it was an option until a few minutes ago.”
“That wasn’t an answer.”
“Yes, I will become banshee.”
“You’re sure?”
“Yes, I’m almost there already, and if nothing else, it will bring me closer to Ian.”
“And me.”
“I wouldn’t think that possible,” I said with a chuckle. “So, you gonna let me leave or do I need to kick your ass?”
He gave a weak laugh. “I’ll let you go, but you can’t go alone.”
“You want to come?” I thought about it and shook my head. “No, I should go alone.” I didn’t think it’d be a good idea for Seth to go with me. As upset as Ian had been, I didn’t want him to think I had run to Seth after he left.
“You’re not going alone,” Rufus said from the doorway.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I asked.
“I saw Ian as he was leaving. He was quite upset, and there’s only one thing that upsets a man that much.” He raised his eyebrows at me. “A woman.”
“It’s none of your business.”
“Ian is my business. You’re not going alone,” he said, holding up a hand before I could interrupt. “Because it’s too dangerous — not to mention stupid — for you to be roaming around on your own. I’ll take you to him.”
“You?” I asked in disbelief.
“Sugar, you’re not going out there alone. You are target number one for Gabriel.”