Home > Zoey Punches the Future in the Dick(40)

Zoey Punches the Future in the Dick(40)
Author: David Wong

In the original deep, booming voice, The Blowback said, “That money was collected by true believers, who stand for justice—”

Then another voice, nearly overlapping, said, “A loyal member donated his winnings from an injury settlement.”

Then a third, slightly accented voice, said, “It’s none of your business where the money came from, bitch.”

All from the same digital mouth. Zoey finally pieced together that she couldn’t meet with the real-life version of this person because there was no single individual. A bunch of them were just taking turns. Were they all even in this building?

Echo said, “Is there any way we can talk to just one of you? Can you designate a representative, here in the city?”

“When you speak the truth, you speak with one voice.”

They clearly weren’t able to talk simultaneously, so it apparently came down to whoever keyed in first. Zoey imagined a bunch of guys with their fingers hovering over their respective “talk” buttons. The direction of this negotiation would be determined largely by whoever had the quickest reaction time. She wondered how Will would deal with a situation like that and decided that he had already given his answer: he’d bring an army, or stay home.

“You guys have access to my whole life history. You know that a year ago I was poorer than any of you. So my question is, do you think I was a cannibal back then?”

In various tones of voice, The Blowback said,

“You were indoctrinated into the cult when Arthur Livingston died.”

“You’re the one who killed Arthur and dined on his liver.”

“I don’t know what you did back then, bitch.”

Zoey sighed. “Did you hear that I brought pizza?”

The original, booming voice said, “It is scientific fact that substantial wealth makes it physically impossible to feel empathy on a human level. Empathy comes from needing other people. Take that away, and the brain mutates, until it is indistinguishable from that of a serial killer. It becomes unable to perceive the consequences of its actions. The Blowback is here to show you those consequences.”

“So, Echo, too? She won’t eat any animal capable of feeling sadness but you think she dines on human livers?”

The Blowback looked down at Echo and asked in the booming voice, “Do they make you eat the flesh? Are you allowed to answer?”

Zoey threw her hooves into the air. “Wait, you think she’s our hostage?”

Echo said, “I’m really not. I work for her willingly. Whatever you accuse her of, throw me right in. We’re both innocent or we’re both guilty.”

The Blowback came down from the throne, using several golden faces as steps on the way to the floor. He put a hand on “Echo’s” shoulder.

“We know Arthur kidnapped you at a young age,” he said. “If you’re still in there, the real you, tell us. Send us a signal, and we’ll come get you. We can protect you.”

Echo said, “That will absolutely not be necessary.”

Zoey said, “What about Wu? Is he a cannibal? I’m sorry but I’m fascinated by the lore.”

“Wu does the killing and the cutting. These rituals originated with Chinese Mafia.”

“He’s from the suburbs of Oakland.”

Echo asked, “Do you know Titus Chobb?”

A member of the armored crowd behind them shouted, “Dirk!” Then this started a chant of that name.

Zoey said, “So, you do. Or apparently you know his bodyguard.”

The Blowback, in a new voice Zoey hadn’t heard before, said, “Dirk Vikerness is a supreme god among men. Someone send up the DV signal! See if he’s on!”

A short time later, a new figure popped into existence next to The Blowback. Dirk Vikerness looked exactly the same in the game as he did in real life, down to the finest detail. He’d even scanned in his patented yellow-and-black armor. Or had he started with the Hub version of himself and carefully re-created it in the flesh?

Zoey shot a meaningful look at the Echo avatar, then remembered Echo probably couldn’t read the expression of the cow monster standing next to her. What she was trying to communicate was that their situation suddenly seemed much clearer, if not better. Out in the real world, someone like Chobb and his henchmen would have no reason to come within a thousand yards of a place like this, or talk to societal dropouts like these. In the Hub, though, all of the rungs on the ladder were rearranged, Andre’s vectors of power all redrawn. And it had all been invisible to them, because all of it occurred here, in this other world.

Vikerness, whose smirk came through on his avatar perfectly, said, “What is so urgent?”

“The cow came here to scare us into abandoning the quest for justice,” said The Blowback, “after she and her friends tied a man down, still alive, and had a chef make sushi out of his organs as he screamed. Making him watch his own mutilation.”

Zoey threw up her hooves again. “You just keep adding things.”

“Eating him, while he pled for mercy. Then came the orgy, afterward, around his corpse.”

“Oh, my god.”

Dirk Vikerness seemed mildly amused by this. “Is this true? That was very foolish.”

“I just came here to talk, but I’m getting an education.” Zoey looked at The Blowback and said, “Let me guess—our Swedish friend here is the one who keeps turning up with brand-new scandalous information about me. And his boss has mountains of money and profits from this conspiracy theory. But none of you are smart enough to put two and two together?”

Vikerness just smirked harder. “I come to socialize when I am off work. Do you ever let Wu go home to his family?”

“We have a schedule worked out! But, see, it’s harder when I’m being bombarded by nonsensical death threats twenty-four hours a day.”

“If you do not want a negative reputation among this community, perhaps you should stop eating its members, hmm?”

“Tomorrow,” said The Blowback, “we will come for you, and we shall have a feast of our own.”

“That is … not going to go well for you,” said Zoey. “I don’t mean that as a threat. Even now, I don’t want that outcome.”

Vikerness stepped forward and said, “That sounded like a threat to me. Did it sound like a threat to you, boys?”

Zoey shook her head. A cowbell softly jangled.

“You’re such a tough guy. All your muscles. Your boss, too, his personal army … why do you have to fight this cowardly proxy war? You’re using these idiots as your foot soldiers; if you and Chobb have a problem with me, why not face me directly?”

He moved even closer to Zoey and she felt the urge to back up, even though she wasn’t actually in any kind of danger. “We have more than twenty witnesses who can attest that you threatened the residents of this building.”

Echo’s shimmering goddess avatar stepped forward, as if to get between Dirk and Zoey. “We know you knew Dexter Tilley. You were caught on camera together. Did you kill him just for this? To stir up a bunch of broke kids?”

“How many people could have been hurt or killed in the fire at the inn today?” added Zoey. “Do you even care?”

Vikerness was looming over her now. “Out there, you can threaten people, kill them, get them to do what you want. In here, we rule.”

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