Don’t leave me, Vi.
Closing my eyes, I think back to the last time I saw her conscious – down in that basement as Julian hit her again and again and I sob louder. That can’t be my last memory of my baby sister. I have years and years of good memories with her, memories that will warm my heart every time I think of her but the last moment where she was truly Ivy, will haunt me forever. Why did she have to come back?
“Why did you do it?” I whisper, glancing up at her. “I was ready to die to save you; why did you have to come back?”
“Princess,” Chance whispers, his voice pained as he closes his eyes.
“I love you, Vi,” I whisper and Chance kisses my head, his constant touch somehow holding me together. Ali and Izzy kneel next to my chair again and place their hands on my knee, tears falling from both of their eyes. My throat feels tight as pain crashes over me.
Something flashes on the monitor and I squint up at the screen, my heart seizing when the numbers drop again. I’m as close to the bed as my chair will allow but it’s not close enough and I turn to Chance.
“Help me up?”
He nods and I stand before grabbing his hand and climbing onto the bed with her. Grabbing her hand, I lie down next to her and close my eyes.
“It’s okay. You can let go,” I whisper in her ear, hoping wherever she is she can hear me. “I don’t want to let you go but I know this is what you’d want. I always knew I was lucky to have you as a sister and I’ll carry you with me always.”
“Her heartbeat is slowing,” Dr. Price says and a sob bubbles out of me as I squeeze her hand and press a kiss to her cheek.
“Say hi to Daddy for me, okay?” I whisper, tears soaking the pillow underneath me as I feel a gentle touch on my head. Rolling over, I meet Chance’s eyes. He nods and I turn back to Ivy, holding her hand as she drifts away.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Chance
She’s been completely silent since the moment Ivy took her last breath.
Not a word.
Not a sound.
Nothing.
Hell, she hasn’t even cried since the heart monitor flatlined.
The things that worry me more than the devastation or anger on her face is the blank look she’s been wearing for the last twenty-four hours, like she’s dead, too. Devastation and anger, I understand. I know how to deal with those emotions but how do I reach her when my fierce, funny woman is just gone? Vanished without a trace. I’m worried her spark, one of the things I love the most about her, will never come back and I can’t even say that I blame her.
The level of betrayal she’s dealing with combined with everything that happened to her down in that room is enough to break even the strongest person. My hands shake as I picture everything she described to Rodriguez earlier this week and I wish I had gone into that house and ripped those fuckers limb from limb. The only small piece of comfort I get is that she’ll still here with me – physically, at least.
“You want something to eat, Princess?” I ask, watching her as she stands in the entryway of her apartment, her face still blank. The hospital didn’t want to release her since she hasn’t eaten but I finally convinced them that what she needed was to go home. There was no way she was going to cope in a room a few doors down from where her sister died. Although, now that we’re here, I wonder if this was the best idea. The penthouse is a product of her mother and it might just be making things worse.
She ignores my question, her gaze slowly drifting around the room and I take a breath as I turn and plant my hands on the counter. As I release it, I shake my head. I’m a guy that always has a plan. I always know what my next move is but I’m fucking lost here. Part of that could be due to the fact that I can’t stop thinking about calling Rodriguez and seeing if he can give me five minutes alone with Julian and Damian. That’s all I need – five minutes to make them feel ten times the pain they inflicted on my girl.
Sighing, I shake my head and try to think of a way to help her. I lost my mom but we were never really that close, so I have no idea how she’s feeling and no clue on how to help her. But I want to. God, I want to wrap her up and just unburden her, take all her pain inside so she doesn’t have to feel it anymore.
How much can one person go through in a lifetime? She’s been through so much and I have to wonder when it’s going to end. When does she get to be happy?
“How about I order some biscuits and gravy from the diner?” I call out to her only to be met with silence again. “Or maybe you just want to go lie in bed for a while? I can hold you.”
Still nothing.
Do I call Dottie? She’s just as heartbroken as Carly is and dealing with this in her own way but maybe they could help each other. She’s the only other person that knows Carly well enough to help me.
My thoughts drift back to yesterday afternoon in the hospital room as the club surrounded Carly and offered her their support. It was so fucking powerful and I got choked up myself. Truthfully, this is hard on all of us. She may have only been at the clubhouse for a few days, but Ivy made an impact on each one of us and losing her so quickly after losing Dina feels like we’re failing at our only goal.
Sighing, I pull my phone out to call Dottie when the sound of glass breaking has my head snapping up. I spin toward the living room just as Carly knocks a vase off a shelf. It shatters at her feet, joining the shards of pink glass already surrounding her.
“Baby,” I whisper, my brow furrowed. “What are you doing?”
She doesn’t answer me as she picks up a picture frame and tosses it to the floor with a little more force. Glass shoots out across the floor and tears start trickling down her cheeks as she grabs another trinket off the shelf and smashes it to the floor. It shatters in all directions as she grabs the next thing off the shelf.
The tears pour down her face and a sob rips through her as she chucks it across the room. It shatters against the wall and she grabs the next thing, gasping for breath as she claws at her chest. I push off the counter, stepping around all the broken glass as she screams and smashes the glass bowl into the floor. When I reach her, I wrap my arms around her and pull her into my body.
She struggles against me, wailing as her fists pound against my chest and my heart fucking breaks as my eyes fill with tears.
Oh, my gorgeous girl.
“Shh,” I whisper as I hold her tighter and she continues to struggle. Her tears stain my shirt and her deep aching sobs rip my heart apart. What the hell am I supposed to do for her?
“I can’t,” she gasps, gripping my shirt like she’s clinging to me for dear life and I slip my fingers into her hair, massaging the back of her head as I tuck it under my chin.
“I know, Princess.”
She shakes her head, pulling on my shirt harder as she starts to fold in on herself. Her sobs aren’t slowing down or quieting and my fucking chest aches with my inability to fix this for her.
“It hurts,” she gasps again. “I can’t do this…”
“You can,” I whisper and she shakes her head.
“No. I need her.” Another loud, soul crushing sob rips through her. “I need my sister.”
“I know, Sweetheart,” I whisper, a tear falling down my cheek.