I shake my head. “I was just thinking.”
“About what?” He reaches up and brushes his thumb over my cheek, concern filling his hazel eyes and I can feel his love surrounding me as I take a deep breath.
“The year I was homeless.”
Pain flicks across his face as he nods. “Will you tell me about it?”
My teeth sink into my bottom lip and I study him for a second before nodding. As I launch into the whole story, telling him about coming back to Baton Rouge and scrounging for every ounce of food I had. I tell him about sneaking into gas stations or restaurants to try and clean myself up before I got caught and I tell him about constantly moving so the man who killed my parents wouldn’t find me before explaining how bad it was when Dr. Brewer found me. His eyes are wide as he stares up at me and blows out a breath.
“God, Pip… I hate myself for not being there for you. I never should have left…”
Shaking my head, I press my hand to his cheek. “No. It wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. It just was and yeah, it sucked but the only person we can blame is already rotting away in a jail cell.”
“Or dead,” he adds and I cock my head to the side as I scowl at him.
“Huh?”
“Your aunt, baby. She was a cold ass woman and she never did anything to help you deal with what had happened to you.”
“Don’t blame her. She was damn near fifty when she took me in and she never wanted children so to have me forced on her just sucked.”
He clenches his teeth and his body tenses underneath me. “No. You were just a kid and had a horrible thing happen to you. You didn’t deserve her apathy.”
“Wyatt, it could have been so much worse. Besides my parents dying, I was incredibly lucky that I didn’t end up with someone who wanted to hurt me more. Do you know what could have happened to me?”
“Of course, I do,” he growls. “But that still doesn’t make it okay. She barely even paid attention to you. Do you remember that time we both snuck out and slept in the treehouse? My parents were fucking frantic and Aunt Myra didn’t even realize you were gone.”
“It could have been worse,” I repeat. It’s the same thing I tell myself every time I think about what happened after that awful night. I got lucky with Aunt Myra.
“Whatever. I’m just glad my parents took you in after she died.” I shudder as the memory of coming home from school and finding my Aunt Myra dead on the floor from a heart attack fills my mind. Shaking my head, I try to clear the image from my mind as I meet his eyes.
“I got lucky then, too.”
He fights a smile as he shakes his head. “Naw, baby. That wasn’t luck. That was me begging my parents for days and promising them everything under the sun if they would let you come live with us.”
“What?” I ask, my jaw dropping in shock. “You did that for me? Why didn’t you ever tell me?”
“I made them promise they wouldn’t tell you because I wanted you to feel wanted. I wanted you to know that you were loved.”
“Baby,” I breathe, a smile stretching across my face as I lean down and press my lips to his. How in the hell did I get lucky enough to find this man not only once but twice? Pulling back, I flash him the biggest smile. “I love you.”
He wraps his arms around me again and steals another quick kiss before releasing me to lean back on his hands. “I love you, too, Pip. Speaking of which…”
“Yes?” I ask as I arch a brow. He sucks in a breath and my belly flips as I try to figure out what he’s going to say. It has to be big to put that nervous look in his eyes.
“I got you something at the market yesterday.”
I scowl as he reaches into his pocket. When in the hell did he have time to get me a present yesterday? I was always with him. My eyes widen as he pulls out a silver chain with a double infinity symbol on it and grabs my hand, dropping it into my palm.
“Wyatt,” I whisper as I pick it up and study the gem encrusted charm. “This is gorgeous.”
He nods. “It seemed perfect for us since we’re starting over. Or, at least, I hope we are…”
“Oh, Wyatt…”
“I know it’s scary for you and, baby, I'm here to support you and your recovery one hundred percent but please don’t make me do it at a distance.”
I chew on my bottom lip as I meet his eyes. “If we move too fast and I freak out again…”
“I won’t let that happen,” he says, cutting me off as he leans forward and wraps his arms around me again. “If you want me to go to therapy with you so I can learn how to help you or if you tell me you need space for a couple of hours, you got it. Whatever you need, I'll do it but I don’t want to live without you anymore.”
“Anything?”
He nods. “Anything, baby.”
“I don’t know,” I whisper, my heart thundering in my chest. “What if I start leaning on you again?”
“I think it’s okay to lean when you need support, sweetheart, just don’t forget how to stand all on your own.”
My belly flips as I stare back to him, my mind screaming for the right answer but I can’t come up with anything. I want so badly to agree to this but I can’t go back to that dark place, I won’t survive being stalked by the man who killed my parents again.
“Please, trust me, baby. Now that I know what you went through and why, I can be here for you the way I always should have been. I don’t want to take your strength. I just want to make you even stronger.”
I shake my head. “I’m not strong, Wyatt.”
“That’s where you’re wrong and I am really hoping you’ll give me a chance to prove it to you.” His eyes plead with me to give this a chance, trust him with not only my heart but my fragile mind and I suck in a breath as my belly flips again and my heart thuds in my chest.
“Okay.”
A brilliant smile stretches across his face. “Yeah?”
“Yeah, we’ll give this a real shot,” I answer with a nod and he laughs as he crushes me to his chest and slams his lips down on mine. My body relaxes in an instant, melting in his lap as my eyes close and we both spill everything we’re feeling into the kiss - pure joy with a little bit of fear mixed in. But I let it all go. There was a time in my life when I trusted Wyatt with every piece of me and I need to do that again. Now that he knows, now that there are no more secrets between us, he would never let me fall apart again. When he pulls away, he starts planting kisses all over my face and I giggle as I try to push him back and his answering laugh warms my very soul.
“Now that we’ve got that sorted out, there are two other things I wanted to talk to you about,” he says and I arch a brow, as I flash him an expectant look.
“Let’s hear ‘em.”
He stares up at me, his gaze so sure that the last of my worries disappear, ripped from me and pulled out to sea by the tide.
“First, I think we should back out of the leases on both of our apartments and find a place together.”
“Okay,” I agree, nodding my head. I’m not particularly attached to my apartment and I can’t wait to be living with Wyatt again. “What’s the second one?”