He spoke with the most elegant British accent. “My dear Annie. If it were not for you, my life would be a complete bore. You really made me shake a leg this time.”
“It’s all for a good cause, my friend.” Annie pecked him on the cheek. “I hope you can stay for some refreshments and conversation?”
“I would be delighted.” He handed her several bags. Annie was wearing a flowing silk kimono with a wide obi sash, allowing her to stash the velvet bags around her waist. “And I am certainly not going to ask you what in the bloody blazes you are doing.” He tried to stifle a guffaw. He knew Annie could be up to almost anything.
“Excellent idea. The less you know . . . as the saying goes.” She tied the sash in the traditional way, wrapping it from front to back and around the front again, then fastening it securely with a knot. Confident she had the faux jewels well hidden, she and Lincoln returned to the main room. She gave him a pat on the bum and sent him off to the mingling crowd. “We’ll catch up in a bit.”
Annie motioned for Charlotte and Myra to join her across the room. They huddled in a corner, fleshing out their plan. Annie would greet Dr. and Mrs. Marcus, with Myra and Charlotte in tow. After several minutes of idle conversation, Annie would excuse herself, and then Myra and Charlotte would keep the Marcuses distracted by having them introduce their friends. They knew that Norma Marcus would be eager to show off for the countess, but if she were to get antsy and look for Annie, Myra would sidetrack her. Annie had less than ten minutes to complete the exchange of the jewelry before people would be wondering where she was. Lincoln could be a good backup if necessary.
“We can do this. We will do this,” Myra and Annie said in unison, and then Charlotte echoed their determination. They grabbed each other’s hands, said a silent prayer, and finished with a whispered “Amen.”
They expected Julian and Norma Marcus to be the first to arrive. And they were. Norma Marcus was wearing a bright puffy pink thing that served as her dress, with black patent stiletto shoes. But it was the garish red lipstick that made Myra flinch.
Annie did a once-over, checking for which baubles Mrs. Marcus was wearing. She was surprised that there wasn’t much. Large chandelier earrings and her seven-carat diamond engagement ring. Maybe she figured she could not outdo Annie, so she hadn’t bothered to try. Lucky break. But that dress. It was a tutu on steroids.
Annie let Norma prattle on about nothing of interest. She wanted to exhaust her requisite hostess time with the bawdy bimbo and extend as little hospitality as possible. Myra, Annie, and Charlotte tried to avoid making eye contact with each other in fear of bursting out laughing. Women like Norma Marcus gave women a bad name, and that name was bimbo. The only thing that was missing was the bubble gum. That was when Charlotte remembered how Isabelle and Alexis were dressed when they had left for Aspen. Her body started shaking as she ferociously tried to keep from laughing. She cracked. Myra followed. Then Annie. The three of them were howling as their guests stared in shock.
Surprised and perplexed expressions ran across Julian’s and Norma’s faces. Annie was the first to gain her composure.
“I am so sorry. My apologies. It’s a silly private joke we used to share when we were kids.” She took Norma’s hand. “So tell me a little about yourself.” She guided Norma through the growing crowd. “I plan on staying in London for a brief time. I always welcome new donors to my animal charities.” Norma seemed a little unsteady on the spiked heels. Perhaps the word charity was a curse word to Norma.
After a half hour of “How do you dos” with Norma’s friends, Annie politely excused herself. “I must attend to my other guests. We’ll catch up some more later.”
Eyeing Myra and Charlotte, Annie signaled that she was on the move. Charlotte and Myra were to keep their eyes on the Marcuses. Annie slipped through the crowd, kissing cheeks. When it appeared no one was looking in her direction, she slipped out the door to the side stairwell. Debating whether she should slide down the handrails, she realized there wouldn’t be a pile of pillows at the bottom or Charles and Fergus to bounce off. That was something that would have to wait until she got back to Myra’s. She moved swiftly down the stairs, remembering that she had to go one flight below the apartment and then take the lift up. That could eat up several minutes. Lifts did not always arrive on your schedule. Especially when you were in a hurry.
She was careful to avoid the security cameras but was thrown off when the doors to the lift opened and several of her party invitees were inside.
“Annie!” said some of the guests.
“Countess!” other surprised guests blurted.
“Darlings! Good of you to come! You did bring your checkbook, I trust!” Annie was going to get ahead of them before anyone could ask what she was doing in the lift. “Private talk with the doorman.”
“Yes, but this is going up.”
“And so it is. Silly me. So much going on!” She pushed the button for the Marcuses’ floor. “I’ll pop out and grab the next one going down. Be back in a flash!”
She blew kisses as the doors slid shut. She scurried to the Marcuses’ door and picked the lock. She had the floor plan memorized and headed straight to the bedroom closet that housed the stash. She flipped the plastic cover off the emergency lock, inserted her pick tool, jiggled it to the right, left, right, left. The whirring sound of the cylinders falling into place was music to her ears. She took a quick photo of the contents to be sure she placed the replicas in the same positions. After untying her sash, she laid it on the floor and unfolded it, then emptied the contents of the velvet bags. One by one, she withdrew each piece and replaced it with the fake. She had about three more minutes before she would be discovered to be MIA.
As she was closing the safe and resetting the lock, she heard a voice. The shrill of Norma was crystal clear. Hide. Where? And what was Norma doing back in her flat? She realized that Norma was on her cell phone, yammering at someone. Annie dodged behind the bedroom door, hoping the pointed dazzle of her cowgirl boots wouldn’t stick out.
“Yeah. I got to meet ’er. We chatted a bit.” Annie could hear footsteps approaching and Norma’s voice getting louder. “I forgot to wear the Cartier pendant, so I’m back at my flat. Yeah. I noticed she is wearing a Cartier diamond love ring. I want to show her I can also afford Cartier. I know it’s silly, but I don’t want her to think I’m pikey.”
Annie plastered herself behind the bedroom door and held her breath. Pikey is right, she thought to herself. Back home we call it trailer trash with fake bling. And fake it is. Annie started to lose the feeling of wanting to choke the twit. She would get her just desserts soon enough.
Norma kept babbling on her cell as she opened the safe and withdrew the fake pendant. She put the phone down as she fastened the necklace around her neck, not giving it a second glance. She practically stumbled as she picked up her phone and scampered out. “I’ve gotta go. Julian is probably looking for me, and I have to corner the countess one more time. I want to show her off to the club. Ta.”
As soon as Annie heard the click of the front door, she carefully moved in that direction. She put her ear up against the door to listen for any movement in the hallway. She heard the ding of the lift bell. That was probably Norma going back up to the conservatory. Annie slowly opened the door and peered in each direction. No one. She decided to take the steps to avoid any other possible encounters with partygoers.