I was tired. Miserable. I hadn't bought myself new shoes since sophomore year of high school. I spent all my time working. It was hard. Grueling. I valued Vicky because she was a very brief but also very bright part of my life, but that didn't mean she had the right to judge me for my decisions. Even if she understood this world better than I did, she didn't understand my situation. She didn't know what it was like to eat rejected food in the back alley behind Dick’s Diner because I didn't have enough money for groceries until payday. She didn't know what it was like to save up for eighteen months for a shitty microphone so I could host my own podcast.
I wasn't secretive about my struggle, but she didn't attempt to truly see how hard it was for me to survive. And I guess I didn't take the time to see how much her own life was draining her. Maybe my best friend and I didn't know each other as well as we thought.
"I knew you were struggling, but…"
"But your world was so overwhelming that you didn’t have the capacity to think about mine?" I asked. After being in the Civella circle for just a couple days, I knew how easy it was to get sucked into your own reality. I didn’t fault Vicky for not understanding, but I would create a boundary right here. I didn’t have the patience to be judged, and quite frankly, I was in this mess because of her. Malice now held murder over my head. I was lucky that he offered me anything at all. I would be helpless against him should he turn me in for murder. She was privileged enough to get away from this mess, but I didn’t have the freedom of choice like she did.
"Can you at least admit that you're in way over your head?" Vicky asked solemnly.
I stared deeply into my best friend's eyes, taking in her bright blue gaze full of concern and hurt. I wondered if she was feeling the same way that I was. "I was already drowning, Vicky," I replied. "I'm in too deep."
Vicky sighed. I watched as she opened and closed her mouth, as if trying to force the thoughts swirling around her mind past her lips. "He makes it look so appetizing. He'll dangle your deepest desires over your head. My brother doesn't care about your Grams. He doesn't care about you. I don't think he's capable of caring about anything but his empire. I can't help you from here."
"Are we going to be okay?" I asked. I had already decided about working at the club. But it worried me that this decision would cause a wedge between Vicky and me. I already felt somewhat distant from her since the night at the diner. I was struggling to forgive her for abandoning me. She was going to walk out of my life without a second glance, knowing how traumatizing that was for me. But I didn't want to lose her.
"You're my best friend, Juliet. I'll always love you. I just want what's best for you. I can't support you getting close to my brother's business. I've spent my entire life wanting to get out, and I'm not sure I can forgive you for willingly putting yourself right in the middle of it all."
Vicky made it sound like this was some premeditated decision that I had made. It wasn't. Malice blackmailed me. He forced me to end that man's life. I had a feeling that it didn't matter what I said, though. Vicky had it in her mind that I was betraying her by being here. And I wanted to know why.
Before I could process the conversation between us, Anthony yanked the phone out of my hand and stared at his sister. "How's Italy?" he asked in a playful tone. "Did you know our family vacation home is two hours away from one of the oldest cemeteries in the world?"
"You know I only go to creepy cemeteries when you drag me to them, Anthony," Vicky replied dryly, though I sensed affection in her tone. "I suppose one good thing came from this. You got to finally meet Juliet. What do you think?"
Anthony gave me a sideways glance before responding to her. "You were right about us getting along. She has some great ideas for disposing of a body."
"I'd feel better if she were working with you instead of at the club. At least William will be there..."
Anthony's lips tightened into a brief line, but he forced a smile again. "I'll take good care of her. You just stay safe until we can figure out what's going on with this rat. We had another shipment of weapons stolen last night."
I leaned closer to listen to Vicky's response. "I think sending me to the other side of the world is overkill, but I am enjoying the sunshine. Be safe, okay?"
"Will do," Anthony replied before hanging up the phone.
Silence stretched between us for a long moment, and I wiggled anxiously in my seat while waiting for him to speak. "My sister really cares about you," he murmured. He placed his hand on the door handle and cleared his throat. "Guess that means I care about you too. Don't let this place change you, okay?"
I nodded, not sure what to say. There was something about Anthony that made my chest hurt, an instinct that there was more beneath the surface with him that I wasn’t quite getting.
"I promise," I finally whispered, but he was already outside and walking through the back door.
11
Kelsey was a blond bombshell with long legs and a corset tied so tight I wondered how she was breathing. Her stilettos were like stilts, and in the five minutes I'd been in her company, she'd run around this entire space without breaking a sweat or seemingly taking a breath. "Over here is the bar," she said in a bright tone while yanking me toward the middle of the club. I barely had the opportunity to take in my surroundings because she was moving around so quickly. The moment I was escorted through the door, Kelsey stood up and started running me places while talking a mile a minute.
There was no way to describe Eden's Place other than as a dark, gloomy place. Surprisingly, the common area lacked a certain sensuality that I’d expected. The black marble floors clicked under my feet with every step. Red lights illuminated the walls, and black velvet curtains sectioned off different areas of the open space. Lusty music boomed from speakers overhead. Diverse women in all stages of undress stalked around the club, carrying trays and flirting with the early patrons. They were the only sign that this was a sex club. Otherwise, it looked like a club for mobsters to hold meetings.
The bar was massive and served as a focal point for the main room. Lavishly finished tables surrounded the large bar, providing a cozy space for people to sit and visit. Hallways leading out of the main bar area were illuminated with deep red lighting on the floors. Kelsey hadn’t taken me there yet.
"What’s down the hall?" I asked, slightly out of breath from chasing her around the club.
"Those are the performance rooms. I’ll take you there once more shows start. I want you to get the full experience," she said with a wink.
The full experience, huh? "Okay."
"Here is where most of our guests will start out for the night. Sometimes they play poker. Sometimes they sign billion-dollar business deals. Forget everything and anything you overhear. It’s safer that way."
Her advice made sense, but I was supposed to be Malice’s eyes and ears. "Good point," I choked out.
Kelsey gave me a pointed stare. "I’m serious. Keep your head down and act oblivious. You don’t want to end up missing, okay?"