Anthony patted my leg under the covers. "Especially the boss. He might enjoy it more than me. Gory motherfucker. I don’t want to give you a big head or anything, but Nick doesn’t just kill people in his club all willy-nilly. He saw that fucker threatening you and lost his cool. Everyone is talking about it now. The gossip is delicious," he cooed.
I frowned. "I don’t know about all that. I saw Graves's account balance. He owed a fucking lot of money. He had a bar tab open that was six figures."
"Nick doesn’t care about the money," Anthony replied. "He doesn’t run Eden's Place for profit. He hosts it because the only thing worth more than money is information and connections. Graves stopped being useful months ago, which is why he had to start paying. Why else do you think he makes you and Kelsey keep such detailed reports on everyone?" I thought about what Anthony was saying. It was brilliant, actually. Malice had so much blackmail on everyone that he was invincible. "Graves used to own some shipping companies. Helped for smuggling weapons. But he started to get sloppy. Had a few ships repossessed. Made it more difficult for us to do what we needed to do."
"So that’s why Malice killed him," I interjected.
"I wouldn’t be so sure," Anthony replied with a tentative smile. "But let’s not talk about him." He stopped speaking to tug at his collar. "I was wondering if you wanted to go to dinner?"
Based on how nervous Anthony seemed, I couldn’t help but think that this was definitely more than dinner. "Like...on a date?"
He exhaled and stiffened. I tried to look him in the eye, but he was staring at the ground. "Yes. A date."
I liked Anthony a lot. I felt a deep connection with him, but I needed to be honest. I blurted my response and instantly regretted it. "I’ve kissed both your brothers."
He laughed. "Oh?" I watched as he playfully put his fist under his chin. "Tell me. How was it? William seems like the passionate, tragic type. Nick probably held you down and forced his mouth on you."
Anthony wasn’t quite wrong on either account. "That’s pretty accurate actually. I just want to be clear with what’s going on so you don’t think I’m leading you on or anything…" Disappointment hit me like a ton of bricks. I didn’t realize he felt this way, and I wanted to explore it more. I just didn’t know what the fuck I was doing with William and Malice. It was a clusterfuck of epic proportions. I knew on some level, I was just being used and confused. Nothing would come from this, but I didn’t want to just be a doll passed around, either.
"Tell me something," Anthony began while pressing his palms into the mattress and crawling over me. "Do you want to kiss me, Juliet?"
I swallowed, but my response was almost instant. There was something about these men that pulled the truth from my lips. "Yes."
Anthony smiled before hovering just inches from my face. My heart raced. "I want to kiss you too," he admitted in a whisper. "And I haven’t wanted to do that since..." Anthony then reached out and lightly brushed his knuckles along my jaw. "You don’t make my skin burn, Juliet. I want to explore that more."
I tried not to feel disappointed, but suddenly I felt like some experiment. Did he want me, or was this some sort of test for his boundaries and healing? "Okay," I croaked out.
"I like you," Anthony whispered. "You showed up and started talking about grinding bones and liquifying bodies. I’ve been listening to your voice for the past year on your podcast. You’re funny and strong and caring and impressive. I. Like. You. I like how you make me feel. So go ahead and kiss my brothers. I’m not going to give up feeling normal because they’re selfish and sexually confused bastards."
"But you like me?" I repeated. Why I needed this confirmed by this ridiculously attractive man was borderline pathetic.
"I really like you. Get dressed. I’m going to take you to my favorite restaurant."
I bit my lip. "Okay."
Anthony got up from the bed with this renewed smile on his beautiful face. Once he was at the door, I spoke up. "Hey, Anthony?"
He paused. "Yeah?"
"I really like you too."
Dinner was probably the worst food I’d ever had in my life. Anthony took me to this run-down restaurant that probably needed a health inspection, but I could see why he liked it. It was mostly empty and spaced out. He admitted on the ride here that sometimes crowds made him anxious. I suggested that I cook him dinner for a second date, and it made him grin.
I’d worn a lavender summer dress that was flirty but comfortable. My wedge heels were loud against the concrete as we walked back to his car. All in all, it was a really cute date. Anthony was attentive, flirty, and quirky. He asked me about my favorite podcast episodes and jokingly planned for our next body dump expedition.
The night air was warm and thick, and our hands brushed against one another as we made our way back to the car. I’d had a good time, but I struggled to understand where the line was with him.
I found myself wanting to reach out and hold his hand but stopped when I realized it might make him uncomfortable. At one point, he was scratching his jaw, and I licked my lips in appreciation. The strong angles of his face were tempting, but then I felt guilty for lusting after him.
With some people, attraction was instantaneous. It was this heated passion that flowed freely. You couldn’t avoid it. You couldn’t ignore it. With others, attraction was slow, intentional, and secretive. It moved like molasses. With Anthony, I wasn’t sure what I was allowed to do. I wanted to touch and explore him but didn’t want to overwhelm him, either. I was letting him take the lead, and I wasn’t sure where this train was going.
"I’m not exactly sure what was in the pasta I just ate," he joked.
"Probably brains," I deadpanned. "Did you know that Peter Bryan killed his best friend, then fried his brains with butter before eating them?" I asked.
"Episode Thirty-three," Anthony replied with a smile. "I remember your cannibalism series. Can’t say I’ve ever been tempted to eat any of the bodies I’ve handled. Fuck? Maybe, but never eat."
"You’d fuck a corpse?" I asked, not sure if I wanted the answer. It was a hard line for me. And selfishly, I couldn’t compete with a cold dead body. I was completely alive. If that was his preference, there was no hope for us. I wasn’t sure I could realistically date a necrophiliac, no matter how much I enjoyed their company.
"I’ve thought about it but never done it. Before Eden's Place, I thought it would be a good way to get off. Dead people can’t hurt you. They can’t move. Can’t beat you until you pass out. I don’t fear the dead. It’s the living you have to look out for," Anthony said.
It was the first time I’d heard him openly talk about what had happened to him, and I didn’t know how to respond. My initial response was pity, but something told me it would upset Anthony. "I would never hurt you, Anthony," I whispered as we got to his car.
"I know," he replied softly. I wished I knew how to navigate this situation. I wanted to comfort him and kiss him all in the same breath. "Can I try something?"