‘Now, you will be okay, won’t you? If there’s any problems call me. Or George. Or the nursery—’
‘I’ll be too busy snorting cocaine off your coffee table to notice anything wrong.’ She catches my stricken expression. ‘Relax.’
I try to smile, flick on the kettle. ‘Coffee?’
‘I thought if I shared a vodka with Archie he’d sleep better—’
‘Tash.’ My tone is sharper than I intended.
‘Sorry, Leah. You know I’m only joking but it’s probably the last thing you feel like with the anniversary. It’s my defence mechanism.’
‘Defence against what?’
‘I don’t know. Ignore me. My moods are all over the place at the moment. Archie!’ Tash crouches down as a damp Archie snowballs into her open arms.
‘George.’ Tash raises her face and meets his eyes. There’s a beat before he says, ‘Tash.’ He pats his pocket for his car keys. ‘Come on, Leah. We’re going to be late.’
We perch on too-small grey chairs, our feet resting in patches of glitter that I know are impossible to clear up. The smell of Play-Doh is mingled with glue and something sweet. Biscuits, perhaps. George’s knees are bunched to his chest as Rebecca heaps praise on Archie. We are obviously doing something right. Despite my fears and rituals, we are told he is happy and sociable. There are no concerns at all about how he might settle at school. I will be the one who has trouble adjusting.
‘If you want to go through his tray while I clear up?’ Rebecca says.
For the first time in days I feel something close to relaxed as I head into the familiar space, confident my boy is doing well.
George folds himself onto a wooden bench, head craned forward to avoid the coat hooks that dot the wall behind him.
I reach for Archie’s tray, pull it towards me.
When I see what’s inside I can’t stop screaming.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Carly
Then
‘I’ve brought something that will help you,’ Doc said as he stepped into the room. He lifted up a carrier bag. ‘Magazines to pass the time. I’m not sure what you girls like. There’s a Beano, and a fashion one and…’ he wrinkled his nose. ‘Has someone been sick? Is everything okay?’
‘No.’ Carly’s voice cracked under the weight of her tears. ‘Everything is not okay.’ She raised her head, met his gaze. ‘Marie needs a doctor, please. She’s really ill, I… I don’t know what to do. I’ve nothing to clean her up with. Please. You have to fetch help.’
‘I can’t—’
‘Can’t or won’t?’
‘Kids get sick all the time.’ Doc sounded uncertain, as if he’s not used to children.
‘Marie doesn’t. This place is filthy, it’s not even fit for animals. If she dies, it’s on you.’ Carly heard Leah take a sharp intake of breath but Carly couldn’t reassure her. She didn’t believe Marie had anything serious, she was already looking much better but… You twist me around your little finger. She had to have one more try. The atmosphere was heavy with Carly’s expectation, Doc’s silent deliberations. She remained quiet. A game of chess – it was his move.
‘I’m sure… No one’s going to die.’
‘Are you positive?’ Carly’s gaze didn’t waver. ‘If you can’t let us all go, take Marie to a hospital, please. Can you really live with yourself if she doesn’t make it out of here alive?’
‘No… I… This isn’t what…’ Doc stepped forwards and then backwards. ‘Look, it’s not up to me. I’ll go and ask.’ He rushed from the room.
Carly heard the door slam behind him. The sound of Doc’s boots drumming against the concrete corridor, growing fainter and fainter. But the bolts? She hadn’t heard the bolts.
For a split second she was frozen in indecision before the blood roared in her ears. This could be their only chance.
‘Get up.’ She stood, tugging at Marie’s arm.
‘But I’m tired—’
‘Get up. We’re getting out of here, but we have to go. Now!’
‘Away from the germs?’ Leah rose to her feet, taking Marie’s other hand and pulling. ‘Come on, Marie.’
Carly felt a pang of guilt. Marie was washing-powder white. Angry violet bags were carved under her eyes. Vomit crusted down her school shirt. But if they didn’t go now, go quickly…
Tap-tap-tap, said the tree on the bars.
Hurry-hurry-hurry.
She rushed the twins over to the door. The handle was cool and hard in Carly’s hand; it creaked as she twisted it. Her eyes met the clown’s in panic.
Let us out, she silently implored.
You’ll be back, he grinned.
Slowly, slowly she cracked opened the door. Her breath hitching in her throat each time the hinges squeaked. Her heart felt as though it might burst out of her chest as she spotted Doc at the bottom of the corridor, leaning against the front door frame, smoke pluming from his cigarette. He had his back to them as he spoke on the phone, his voice low and urgent. Carly knew he must be asking Moustache if he could take Marie to a doctor. It wouldn’t take him long to say no – he was obviously in charge – but Doc’s voice was insistent. It was almost, almost as though he was on their side.
Carly raised her index finger to her lips, warning her sisters to be quiet as she led them out of the room, turning away from the front door. Carly first, Marie’s fingers tightly around hers, Leah third, one hand holding her twin’s, the other clutching the bear in the red jumper. Ducks in a row, waiting for the hunt. To the left and right were rooms. If they hid in one of these they could be trapped, easy to find. At the other end of the corridor, the stairs. There was a chance Doc could turn around and spot them before they made it there. But even if they reached them, the wood could be rotten, the stairwell collapsing before they had climbed to the top – and if they did reach the second floor, what then?
She only had a split second to make a decision.
Think.
Carly led her sisters through the doorway to the room next door to theirs, the terror in her throat growing with every step. The room was smaller than theirs; the graffiti on the walls here was oddly beautiful. A woman riding a unicorn, long pink hair flowing behind her. The floor was littered with empty aerosol bottles, crumpled foil, syringes. A crumpled sleeping bag in the corner. Outside the wind howled, the rain blew through the empty window frame, puddling on the floor. Here, there were no bars.
The girls crunched over broken glass as they hurried across the room.
Carly linked her fingers together, her hands forming a step. She nodded at Leah, praying she didn’t protest it was too high, she was too scared, she didn’t want to be first. With a quick glance at Marie, Leah placed her foot in Carly’s hands, and allowed herself to be hefted upright, until she could scramble through the gap, dropping to the outside with a thud. She reached back through the open space and quickly helped Marie out.
The front door slammed. Doc’s footsteps echoing down the corridor.
Hurry-hurry-hurry.
Carly’s pulse accelerated. They had minutes, perhaps only seconds, before he discovered they had gone. She threw a leg over the window and hurled herself outside. Grabbing the twins’ hands she dragged them away from the building. It was stupid to stay out in the open. They’d be spotted almost straight away. The nearest building, the one with the NORWOOD ARMY CAMP sign was only a few metres away.