“You don’t care?”
He shrugged.
“Well, you should.”
“Why’s that, love? Everyone should be thanking me for getting them out of work today.”
“Which brings me to the point of this visit. You may not need that rehearsal, but others do. Like me. If you don’t want to be here so badly, then what’s the problem with letting someone stand in for you?” I couldn’t believe I was shaking, but trying to get through to Sebastian Chase was the most infuriating thing I’d ever tried to do. “Your blowups have repercussions,” I continued. “You’d know that if you weren’t so damn selfish.”
Sebastian narrowed his eyes. “I’d hardly call protecting my career and reputation selfish. Some of us do what we need to do, Kai. We don’t cower under a little bit of fear. We stand up and face our fears every goddamn day.”
Heat prickled behind my eyelids, and my chest felt heavy. The fact that he’d just used my father’s tragedy as a way to make himself feel better was too much. Why had I thought I could reason with the asshole? He was a mess, and he would only take me down with him.
When my first tear fell, I swiped it away just as quickly as I could and took one step away from his door. “Do what you need to do, Sebastian. Just don’t think for a second that I’ll let you stand in my way.”
I walked away from his room, in no mood to go to my own, and took the stairs two at a time until I reached the fourth deck. I’d heard about the private pool area for crew members only, but I’d never dared to explore it. It didn’t have much, not even a view of the water, which relieved me, just a row of dark-blue chaise lounges and a large plasma TV on the wall.
A minute later, I was about to sit on one of the chairs when the door burst open behind me. “Wait, Kai. Shit. I’m sorry.”
Oh my God. He did not just follow me. I wanted to scream the words and shove him right back through the same door he’d just come in. Instead, I let out a frustrated growl and took the next set of stairs up one more deck. I walked through the mazelike entrance, praying he wouldn’t follow me again. I needed to be away from him. To think. Because whatever had or hadn’t happened last night was stirring up feelings inside me I had no business feeling.
As soon as I cleared the entrance, I was hit by the sight of sparkling blue water reaching as far as the eye could see. Panic immediately kicked in. My heart beat faster as my pulse rocketed through my veins and my breathing went shallow. Shit.
I turned away, facing the blue privacy glass that sectioned off the deck like a small observation area. In my haste to get away, I clearly hadn’t thought my destination through. If I wasn’t so freaked out, I might have actually laughed at the irony. The entire reason I wanted to get away from Sebastian was because of what he’d said about my fear. Yet there I was, a mere twenty feet from facing it. If I could only turn around.
Footsteps closed in from behind me until I felt strong arms wrapping around my body.
“Damn, I would have pissed you off a lot sooner if I knew you’d end up here.”
My whole body was shaking despite the strength of his hold. “It was an accident.”
He didn’t respond right away, but when he did, I almost didn’t recognize his voice. “Do you really believe that?” The question was a heavy one, but he’d delivered it with a gentleness that warmed me.
I shook my head. I sensed something fateful about the timing of it all, which I couldn’t ignore no matter how furious I was with Sebastian.
“Then turn around, Kai.”
I swallowed and took a breath before swiveling slowly to face him, my eyes instantly finding his. “Your eyes are the exact color of the ocean. Bright blue with swirls of green. And they shimmer when you laugh.”
“They shimmer?” He narrowed his eyes without stopping the smile playing on his lips.
A heavier sigh rushed through me as I nodded. Strange, how peaceful I could feel in the arms of a man who challenged me constantly.
“Yeah? Well, it’s funny you say that, because your eyes kind of remind me of the Earth—light brown, almost reddish if you catch them in the right light. But they’re steady, nonetheless, with the kind of confidence that drives me wild.”
I let out a laugh. “Confidence? You can say that with a straight face while I’m trembling in your arms?”
He lifted his brows. “I’m just happy you’re not staring back at me like you want to kill me anymore.”
“I’m sure the desire will return shortly. Just keep standing there.”
“Actually,” he said with a stifled laugh. “You might have done yourself a disservice. You’re kind of hot when you get all worked up. I like it.”
“Stop it.”
He chuckled again. “No, seriously. You’re like a blazing fire when you’re angry.”
“And you’re like a block of ice.”
He narrowed his eyes, his cheeks high from his infectious smile, then he leaned in, brushing my nose with his. “Wanna warm me up?”
“Sebastian,” I said with a half sigh, half laugh, but my heart was flip-flopping like crazy in my chest. This time, it had nothing to do with the open sea at his back. This time, it was all him.
One of his arms was still wrapped around my waist while the other slid up to cup my cheek. His gaze darted from my eyes to my lips. “If I kiss you, that wouldn’t be crossing the line, would it? Because I really want to kiss you right now.”
“For someone who calls himself the Bad Boy of Broadway, you sure ask for permission a lot.”
His lips teased mine as he smiled. “Are you giving me permission to stop asking for permission?”
“No. I kind of like it.”
“Well, then can I? Kiss you?”
“Yes, but let me do something first.”
Chapter 28
Sebastian
Kai’s white knuckles gripped the balcony rail while her entire body shook. I had to resist the urge to swoop in and comfort her. This was something she wanted to do on her own, and she should.
Her elbows were locked, keeping her body an arm’s length away from whatever scared her the most. I knew she was afraid to face the memories of her father, but the determination in her features told me she was ready to try.
As she eventually unlocked her arms and brought herself closer to the rail, I felt a sense of pride at how much she’d overcome since that first night I’d learned about what had happened to her father. I knew upon our first meeting that Kai was as feisty as they came, but I hadn’t truly recognized her strength before.
That got me thinking about my own fears, if I could call them that. Most others would refer to my possessive issues with Angst and Grace as narcissism or jealousy, but they had no idea. How could they when no one knew the whole truth? No one knew it was my fiancée and my fucking co-producer that stabbed me in the back first. All I cared about was getting back the rights to my show so that I could bury it quietly and move on with my existence.
On second thought, maybe I had something—or someone—to care about now. I looked up just in time to watch Kai lean into the railing. Wind tossed her hair around her face as seagulls squawked overhead. Her shoulders visibly relaxed.