The few times he’d seen her she’d put on a good face, and he didn’t think any of their friends or colleagues knew she was hurting. But he looked into her eyes and saw pain, and it gutted him that he was the cause. He had no idea what she saw when she looked at him but was sure he wasn’t able to hide his sorrow.
Marriage to Melissa was out of the question. He was not going to pledge his life to a woman that he still didn’t trust two months after finding out she was pregnant. But the baby would know his father. The baby would be financially cared for, and he would split custody with Melissa. While he might not feel anything toward her, he would not abandon his child. My child… but is it?
Melissa had been avoiding the issue of her exact due date, creating more doubt in his mind, but he’d insisted on a paternity test. She wasn’t happy about it, but when he wouldn’t budge on offering financial assistance without proof the child was his, she’d given in.
A movement toward the front door of the clinic caught his eye, and he watched as Melissa glanced around the parking lot before walking in. She was already in maternity clothing and he wondered why there was no baby bump showing. He waited to see if paternal feelings of love kicked in, and when they didn’t, wondered if something was wrong with him. While it might make him a bastard, he needed proof that the baby was his. If it was, he would alter his life and lifestyle to make sure his baby was taken care of and loved. I just need to be sure.
Forcing his fingers to unwrap from around the steering wheel, he climbed from his truck and followed her into the clinic. She had checked in and was moving to a seat, her head snapping around toward him, a tight smile on her face.
He had always possessed a keen bullshit meter. That particular trait came in handy with his chosen career in law enforcement. And he could swear that something was hidden behind her smile. Today, he was going to find out if his instincts were right.
Dylan sat in his vehicle again, this time staring out the windshield at the little bungalow. Checking the address again, he swallowed deeply, a mixture of emotions rushing through his mind. He hadn’t seen Hannah since the Chiefs’ meeting several weeks ago and could only pray she’d talk to him… or at least listen to him.
Wiping his hands on his jeans, he climbed down from behind the wheel and began walking up the pine-needle path toward the front porch.
The front door opened before he reached the steps, and Hannah peered through the screen door, surprise written on her face. Wearing yoga pants and a green t-shirt, she looked comfortable in bare feet. Her hair was down, the way he’d always liked it, flowing about her shoulders. Her face was just as breathtakingly beautiful as he remembered.
Opening the screen door, she came out onto the porch, her hand easing the door shut behind her. Brow furrowed, her eyes roamed over him. “Dylan? Are you okay?”
Suddenly unsure, he shoved his hands into his pockets. “Uh, yeah. I… I had some news and wanted to… well, you were the first person I wanted to tell… uh… if you’ve got time…”
She stared for a long, silent moment, her gaze assessing him, and he prepared to beg if necessary. Finally, she inclined her head toward one of the rockers on the front porch, and while it wasn’t the same as her inviting him inside, he was grateful for the chance she was giving him. They settled into the chairs, and she planted one foot onto the seat, wrapping her arms around her bent knee. Slowly rocking, she gave him her attention. Now that he was there, all the words he wanted to say seemed jumbled.
“I can tell there’s a lot on your mind,” she prodded.
Her soft voice soothed over him, and he’d missed hearing it, letting it seep deep inside. He nodded, then leaned forward and propped his forearms onto his knees, clasping his hands together. “I’m not sure where to start.”
“Wherever it feels right.”
“I feel like I should start at the beginning, but honestly, I guess I’ll jump into the middle.” He turned his head and held her gaze, wanting to see her expression. “Melissa’s baby isn’t mine.”
Her eyes widened and she gasped, and he remembered the last time he’d heard that sound. It was standing in the restaurant parking lot, hearing Melissa declare that she was pregnant with his child. Wishing he could erase that event, he hurried to explain. “I was suspicious right from the beginning. I had used a condom… I always use a condom. And hadn’t noticed a problem with it, but I know they’re not infallible.” She remained quiet, and he hoped that was a good sign.
“Anyway, I know it probably doesn’t matter, but I feel like I need to explain.” He stared into her beautiful face and said, “I was never a great student, but I was a decent athlete in high school. That was all it took to impress girls when I was a teenager, and I’ll admit that I let it go to my head. Four years in the military, and I wasn’t much more discerning as an adult. Honest to God, I was never a player. I never met anyone that I was interested in having a relationship with, but I never played a woman. I also never slept around nearly as much as most people assume, but I never disavowed them of the notion. Guess I thought it made me sound like a big deal, which is fuckin’ stupid.”
The rocking chairs had been slightly angled toward each other, but now he scooted around so that he was facing her. “Until I met you, Hannah, I never met any woman that I wanted to spend time with. You were different. You were everything.”
Her lips curved slightly, but her eyes gave nothing away. He had no idea what she was thinking. Finally, she prodded, “What happened with the baby?”
He scrubbed his hand over his face, fatigue weighing on him. “I wish I could say I was excited at the prospect of fatherhood, but considering she was a one night stand with someone I met at a bar who was only passing through town, meaning I wouldn't have to see her again… well, the idea of being connected to her even though a child was not what I wanted. And, like I said, I was suspicious.”
“Suspicious?”
“Look, I don’t know a lot about pregnancies, but she said she was already ten weeks along. Which, of course, made it exactly at the time I’d been with her. I asked her when she realized she was pregnant, and she was evasive. Said her periods were irregular, and she hadn’t noticed she was late. Then, she said it took her a while to find me. Hell, she knew I was from this town, and Seaside isn’t exactly a metropolis.”
He battled back the anger that he always felt when he thought about Melissa, not wanting that emotion to erupt. Sucking in a deep breath, he let it out slowly, forcing his heartbeat to steady. “She immediately said that she wanted financial assistance and wanted me to be involved. When I asked about a paternity test, she became defensive. The past seven weeks have been pretty horrible. I hadn’t even told my family yet, but I knew that was coming. She was pushing for it, but I was insisting on the test first.”
“What happened?”
“We finally went to have the blood draw to determine paternity and discovered that instead of being seventeen weeks pregnant, she was only twelve.”
At this, Hannah gasped again, her eyes jerking open even wider. “Twelve? But… but… how…”
Nodding slowly, he said, “Exactly.” Seeing Hannah’s expression still exhibiting confusion, he pushed further. “So, when she told me she was ten weeks pregnant, she did so because that’s when I had been with her. She was only about five weeks along. Hannah, I wasn’t the father.”