“I shouldn’t have done that,” I admit to her when we break apart in favor of dragging some air into our lungs. Our legs are still tangled together and my arm locked around her body.
“Done what?”
“Took your virginity. Not like that. I’m sorry.”
“You’re sorry?” she asks with a laugh. “I’m pretty sure I asked you for it.”
“I know but…” I push up on my elbow and look down at her, my hand lifting to the red mark on her cheek that has anger stirring in my belly. “Why did you come here, Poppy?”
Her body tenses, telling me that I’m right. Not that I needed any kind of confirmation, I knew it the moment she pushed the door open and I took advantage.
“I needed you.”
“Yeah, I know.” I can’t help a smile tugging at my lips. “But why? You’ve ignored me since you sent me away and then this.”
She breaks our eye contact. I hate that she still thinks she can hide from me.
“Poppy?” I ask, cupping her cheek and turning her face back to me.
She lifts her arm as if she’s going to pull my hand away, but she doesn’t get the chance because I find something that I’ve missed this far.
“What the fuck is this?” I lift her arm up in front of me, inspecting the welts and cuts around it.
She tries tugging it away but I’m stronger by far. “It’s… it’s nothing.”
“Bullshit. What happened this afternoon, Poppy?”
“It’s nothing.”
“Stop lying to me.” My anger explodes within me, my muscles twitch to get up and start pacing, do anything to try to expel my need to do something but I fight it and keep her in my arms.
“What good will it do? The last time you knew something happened, you got yourself suspended. I refuse to allow this to ruin your future.”
“My future. What about your present, Poppy?”
“It doesn’t matter,” she whispers.
“Like fuck it doesn’t. You don’t deserve any of this. Fuck.” I throw myself back on the bed, my irritation at her being able to just brush it off like it all means nothing pisses me off beyond belief.
“Zayn, please. You’ve already done too much. Just trust me to handle it.”
“Handle it?” I sit up, grabbing both of her hands and staring down at her red wrists. “He fucking bound you. What else did he do, Poppy?” Lifting my hand, I brush my thumb over the red mark on her cheek.
She shakes her head, still refusing to give me the answers I need.
“You need to stop protecting him,” I snap.
“So what am I supposed to do? Tell the teachers? Hartmann? We both know that his daddy will make sure everything is swept under the rug. Or should I tell Jake and watch as he ruins his own future by going in all guns blazing like you did?”
I blow out a breath. “I don’t know, Poppy. But you can’t continue like this.”
“He’ll get bored eventually.”
“No, he won’t. We both know you’re just lying to yourself. He won’t stop until he gets what he wants.”
“Not happening.”
“Fuck.” I drop my head into my hands. “He should not win. It’s fucking wrong.”
She climbs from the bed. “You think I don’t know that? This has been my life for years, Zayn.” She lifts her arms from her body in exasperation.
“Years?”
“Yeah, well… not quite like this. The past week or so, it’s been worse. He’s suddenly turned into an even bigger psycho.”
“What’s changed?”
She bends down, swiping her discarded clothes from the floor and begins dragging them on.
“You. You are what’s changed.”
I gasp, not expecting to hear her say that. I thought it was just that it’s senior year and his time to shine was almost in touching distance.
“Because I beat the shit out of him?”
“No, Zayn,” she breathes as if I’m an idiot. “He knows about this.” She gestures between us.
“H-how?” I scoot to the end of the bed, not happy with the distance she’s put between us.
“It doesn’t matter. He just does.”
“How, Poppy?” I ask, standing and stalking toward her until she has no choice but to back up.
“Just leave it. Coming here was a mistake. I shouldn’t have—” Her words are cut off when she hits the wall.
Lifting my arms, I cage her in.
“How does he know, Poppy?”
“Fuck.” She looks over my shoulder, unable to keep eye contact but I don’t fight her on it, I know I’ve already won. “Where was the ladder when you climbed up it the other night?”
“Against the wall a few feet from your…. No, no, Poppy do not tell me that he—”
“He was already there. I just assumed you found the ladder where it’s always been. I never in a million years thought you meant it was already up against my balcony.”
“Where was he?”
“In the bathroom.”
“Fuck,” I roar, my knuckles connecting with the wall beside her as she cowers away from me. “Shit, I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.”
I wrap my arms around her trembling body but she fights me.
“No, I need to go. I shouldn’t have even come here in the first place.”
“Poppy, please.” My voice is bordering on begging but I don’t give a shit. I can’t have her leaving and putting herself in danger. “I’m not letting you walk out of here alone.”
“Well, then I guess it’s a good thing that you have no control over me, isn’t it? I refuse to cower down to that prick.”
“No, no,” I shout. “He can’t touch you again. He just fucking can’t.”
“Why, Zayn?”
“Because you’re mine,” I roar, my chest heaving as our eyes lock.
Her breath catches for a beat before she recovers from my admission.
“That’s just it though, isn’t it? I’m not yours, and I never have been. You haven’t treated me much better than him over the years.”
“I’d never hurt you, Poppy.”
“Physically, no. But do you have any idea how many nights I’ve fallen asleep crying because of you?”
My lips part in shock.
“No, exactly. You have no fucking clue.”
While I’m standing frozen in shock, she pushes her feet into her sneakers, rips the door open and disappears from my sight.
I made her cry herself to sleep?
“Shit, Poppy, wait,” I cry, fumbling around for my boxers.
They’re only halfway up my legs when I follow her out of the room and toward the stairs.
“Poppy, please, stop. Just…” I race down the stairs and find her with her back to me and her hand ready to open the front door and leave.
“You don’t want me, Zayn. You never have. I’m just a plaything, a toy that you had some fun with when your friends weren’t around. Let’s not pretend there’s any more here than there really is.”
“No, that’s not true.”
“Well you just scored the ultimate win. All the way with your sister’s best friend, that must get you some points with the team, right?”