54
Just Like Him
The second Annie’s lips hit mine, I know I can do this.
I draw out the kiss, pulling her onto my lap while my brain catalogues every sensation of it. Her words ring in my mind, so sure and confident.
She doesn’t see me as a killer.
Not that I pulled the trigger, but I helped hide the truth.
I’ve always wondered what Grandpa would have thought about what we did.
The horror will no doubt haunt me forever.
But I’m home now.
I’m home to wipe away the ugly past and make this place what it was before.
With Annie by my side, I can do it.
“Hey, you guys! You guys, look at this! Look!”
Jackson comes busting into the room. Annie jumps off my knee and wipes the edge of her lips.
“Ugh!” Jackson tips back his head. “Am I gonna have to put up with this every time I leave you two alone? Please, for once, let me walk into a room and not have to see you sucking each other’s faces off!”
“Jackson!” Annie scolds him, but the look on his face just makes me laugh.
The sound surprises me at first.
I was in the blackest place when they first got home with the groceries, and now I’m feeling lighter.
Telling Annie the truth about that night has freed me somehow.
I’ll need to unpack more, no doubt, but I’m confident she’ll listen and say all the right things. The point is, she doesn’t hate me for what I did.
“Check it out.” Jackson walks toward us, opening up a book to the page he was marking with his fingers. “Is that you?”
I gaze over his shoulder, staring down at a photo of me and my brothers. And Grandpa Ray.
“Wow,” I murmur, taking the album off Jackson so I can have a closer look.
“Who’s who?” Jackson hits the image with his finger, marking my younger face. “That’s you, right?”
I brush his hand away and nod. “Yeah. And that’s Deeks.” I point to my slightly shorter brother, then over to the blond one. “Cooper.” Then I tap my nail on the next boy. “Brody,” I tell them, who was already turning into a giant by then, and his smaller twin. “This is Jake.” And then my voice cracks a little as I touch the last face in the photo. “Grandpa Ray.”
“Aw. You guys are handsome.” Annie leans against my arm. “Look at you. I bet the girls were lining up to date the Barrett boys.”
I chuckle. “Nah, just Deeks. He was always after the ladies.”
“But not you?” She looks up at me.
“I was waiting for the right one.” I wrap my arm around her shoulders and kiss her.
“You guys!” Jackson whines. “Stop it already!”
Annie giggles into my mouth.
“We’ve got groceries to unpack! Let’s go!” Jackson orders us apart.
Annie rolls her eyes and trails me into the kitchen. We get busy putting things in their right place. I remember where everything used to live, and the others seem happy enough to keep it like it once was. This makes me feel better somehow.
Annie starts making a list of the things we still need to get, and I’m just about to call the power company when a pickup truck screeches up beside the back of the house.
We all freeze and share quick glances.
Jackson looks curious, while Annie’s eyebrows pinch with fear.
I grab her hand and pull her behind me, turning to face the door.
“Jackson,” I whisper. “Get over here.”
He steps behind me, and we all eye the kitchen door like a monster’s about to bust through it.
The slamming truck door doesn’t help.
There’s a stomping on the steps and the door flies open.
“I’ve had about enough of this! You kids need to leave well enough alone!” An older woman who I never thought I’d see again bursts through the door, her wispy gray hair flying off her shoulders as she marches into the kitchen and starts ranting. “This is private property. Enough sneaking around. Did last Christmas not teach you—”
Her voice cuts off, her lips forming a wide O while her mouth drops open as if her jaw hinge is broken.
“Michael?” she whispers, sucking in the word on a breath and then releasing it. “Is that you?”
I can’t believe it.
Nell. Sweet Nell.
A slow smile tugs at my mouth and I don’t know whether I want to laugh or cry. “Hey, Aunt Nell.”
“Oh my Lord!” She claps her hands together, tipping her head back with a short whoop before stretching her arms wide and pulling me into a hug. “You’re home. I’ve been waiting for you Barrett boys to return.”
I wrap my arms around her. She feels smaller than she used to.
Snapping away from me, she holds my shoulders, her keen eyes demanding the truth. “Where are your brothers?”
It takes me a moment to answer. My throat is thick and gummy, but eventually I manage to clear it and rasp, “I don’t know. I haven’t seen them in years.”
Her face crests with sadness, but then she sniffs and gives a determined nod. “Well, I think it’s about time we fix that.” She winks at me, then grins at Annie. “The first one’s returned home. There’s hope yet. My prayers are being answered. Even if it takes one at a time, this place will be filled with Barrett boys again. I refuse to believe anything else.”
I wish I could believe like she did.
The idea of having my brothers all here again fills me with an excitement I can’t even express.
But how the hell are we supposed to make that happen?
I don’t know where any of them are. It’s not going to be easy to track them down.
“Now, introduce me to these lovely people, and then catch me up on all your news.” Aunt Nell bustles past me, wrapping Annie in a hug. “I’m Nell, sweetness, and you are adorable. You guys need to come over for dinner tonight. And have you called Marty yet? He’s the new power man in this county, and he is such a darling. He’ll get you hooked up right away. I’ll get Thomas to come on over and help you get the water running.”
“I’ve done that already,” I’m proud to admit.
She spins with a smile, wrapping her arm around Jackson’s shoulders like he’s her own grandson. He looks up at her, still trying to figure out who this over-friendly woman is. He’ll soon learn and fall in love just like everybody else does.
“You look like him, you know.” She smiles at me. “So much of your mother in you. So much of Ray. He’d be mighty proud to see you standing here again.”
Her kind words make it impossible to speak.
All I can do is bob my head and hope she’s right.
I always wanted to be just like my grandpa.
Maybe now that I’m back, I can be.
Epilogue
The weeks have ticked by without too much drama.
Jackson started school but has only got two weeks to go before the summer break kicks in. At least he’s formed a few friendships, though. The kids were pretty welcoming, and of course he can’t stop going on about Hailey Parker. He tries to act like he’s not interested in her, but he’s failing big-time.