Elias sat back on his heels. There were furrows across his brow now.
“You think I have PTSD or something?”
“I don’t know, but I saw how you were after what happened at the condo, and I don’t want to ask you to have to do that again.”
He dropped his gaze to the floor for a moment, his hands still on her knees. She covered his hands with hers.
“I don’t think less of you. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m respecting that you’ve gone a different path than me.” Shit. She was going about this all wrong.
Elias turned his hands over, clasping his hands with hers, and tipped his face up. “I’ve learned a bit about myself the last few days, too. You know, after the accident I knew I wasn’t entirely right. I’ve lived the last few years thinking things about myself. Zain called me out for not being a team player, and he was right. I’ve spent so long thinking there’s something wrong with me, I think I created a problem that wasn’t there. Yeah, after the accident I had...issues. I’m never going back into front-line work because I can’t handle the physical toll on my body, but I don’t think I’m as fucked up as I thought I was.”
“I saw your face yesterday...”
“Yesterday was the first time I’ve shot someone at close range since before the accident. I think my reaction proves I’m human more than anything else. If I had shot that guy without it bothering me, then I’d think we have an issue.”
Jo waded through his words again. She only knew what had been shared with her following the accident about his injuries. Did she trust him to tell her the truth?
The open honesty shining back at her was hard to refute.
He hadn’t hesitated or choked once. There was no reason not to trust him or believe he wouldn’t tomorrow.
“I want what’s best for you,” she said.
“And that’s being with you. Watching your back is where I belong.”
She sighed. “You sure know how to sweet talk a girl.”
Jo would be lying if she didn’t admit that having him there would put her mind at ease. There was just something about Elias that made her feel complete. They were perfectly fine on their own, but together they were stronger. She could trust him to reel her in when she went too far and to watch her back.
She wanted to ask him about the future, but she couldn’t bring herself to get out of this moment with him.
Elias lifted her right hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “I’m not much of a sweet talker.”
It was the way he held her gaze, allowing her to see the smoldering heat that did her in.
This man could be dangerous to her heart, if he didn’t care about her. But he did. She knew in her soul that Elias would protect her with his very body if it came to that. She’d never meant that much to anyone before. Not even her own mother.
Jo felt such an overwhelming tide of emotions surge over her.
She couldn’t remain sitting.
She unfolded her legs. Elias sat back on his heels. She stepped over him to pace the room.
“Sorry, was that the wrong thing to say?” he asked after a moment.
“You didn’t say anything wrong, I’m just thinking.”
“Want to talk it out?” He pushed up and sat on the edge of the bed.
She stopped at the foot of the bed and looked at him.
The scars on his left side were faded compared to when she’d last seen them. He’d never be rid of them, but he didn’t seem as bothered by those injuries now. They’d all been worried about him in the beginning, but she hadn’t known what to do or how to reach out.
Jo was so emotionally stunted. She didn’t know how to connect with a man who so obviously cared about her or how to return that affection. She was the broken one here, not him.
She circled the bed to stand in front of him. He automatically lifted his hand, twining his fingers with hers. She gave him a squeeze, holding on tight.
“I don’t know what to do about this. You and me. Whatever this is. I want to do what’s best for you and selfishly I want the exact opposite.”
“What’s best for me right now is being where you are. All I’m going to do otherwise is sit up worrying about you.”
She closed her eyes to shut out his intense stare. How was she supposed to respond to that?
Elias wrapped his arm around her waist, drawing her closer to stand between his legs. He pushed her shirt up, kissing her stomach and up to her ribs.
Immediately her body responded. Her skin heated and gooseflesh rose up. Arousal ran hot in her veins.
She let go of his hand and pulled her T-shirt up and over her head.
Elias wrapped his arms around her and stood. She sucked down air and held tight to his shoulders as he walked the few feet to the dresser.
It was impossible to see him as anything except desirable when he demonstrated his strength. The scars, to her, simply added to his character. He’d survived and gone on to thrive.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down for a hot kiss. His fingers curled in her hair and she groaned as he tugged. Just a little, not hard. He tipped her head back and kissed down her neck, past her collar bone. His fingers traced her sports bra.
Jo had never fully figured out bras. It was her failing as a woman. The sizing baffled her, and there were too many options. Sports bras were easy.
But panties?
She had a thing for pretty panties.
Elias ran his fingers over hear breast and she shivered. “Does this thing have a combination lock?”
Jo snorted and laughed. “It’s a bra.”
“Yeah, but it looks like a second skin.”
She reached down and pealed the bra up. He had a point. It was a snug fit. She got it halfway off before Elias lent her a hand. It was much easier getting the darn thing off with a little help. She was grateful when the bra went sailing onto the floor.
Elias braced his hands on the dresser. One side of his mouth hitched up in a mischievous smile she hadn’t seen from him in years. It melted her heart completely and left her vulnerable to all the emotions flitting about inside of her.
“Much better,” he said.
“Hmm.”
She slid her barefoot up his calf to where the towel hung near his knee. A pinch and a tug was all it took for the terrycloth to join her bra on the floor.
“Oopse,” she said.
His cock bobbed toward her, already semi-erect.
She knew she’d come in here for a reason that now escaped her mind. How could she think about anything else than her need for him?
Elias grinned and leaned forward, pressing a hot, open-mouthed kiss to her lips that silenced any and all thought. He cupped her ass and pulled her forward until her hips cradled him. She reached for his cock, stroking him from root to tip.
Someday she wanted to spend hours doing this. They didn’t have that luxury right now.
Elias pulled back and tugged on her jeans, popping the button free. She lifted her bottom, and he dragged her pants down far enough to display her lacey black boy shorts.
“You ever wear those matching set things?” He traced the scalloped lace at the top of her thigh.
“No.” She could feel her face flaming hot. “Nothing ever fits, so I just get the panties.”
“Oh, okay.”
He pressed his fingers against her pussy with nothing but a thin layer of lace and satin between them. She gasped, and he kissed her, thrusting his tongue into her mouth.