And that’s why I trust him—believe him.
“You promise?” I whisper, swallowing and letting my chest slowly rise through every bated exhale.
His fingers rub small circles over denim-clad hips. Not making another move to kiss me, he pulls me down until we’re resting side by side. One of his arms drapes around my shoulders, keeping me locked in tight. My cheek rests against his pec, my palm just above his belly button.
He says, “Promise.”
Chapter Sixteen
Corbin / Present
My hands slowly map out soft curves until my fingers meet the scratchy denim hugging a slim waist. Subconsciously, I know it’s all wrong. My fingertips should be teasing the worn elastic band of black leggings, fumbling to work past the onset of giggles from the slightest area where she’s ticklish.
“Ryker.” Her ass arches back and grinds into my front, causing my lips to nip the hollow of her neck that she exposes to me. “Not here.”
“Not here,” I repeat, popping the button and stalling on the zipper. “You say that every time we meet, Beck. We can’t get caught anymore. What are you afraid of?”
Her grip on the railing tightens, and I know the effects they’ll use to emphasize the clear night will make the scene better. Our sins are masked in darkness, but our indiscretions are highlighted by the apartment behind us that my character never should have walked into.
The breathy sound of her voice says, “Us. That’s what I’m afraid of. We aren’t simple people. We ruin everything. We’re bad.”
My lips trail down the back of her neck, causing her breath to catch. “Nothing about us has ever been simple. That’s why we work. We’re complicated. Our love is complicated. Our situation—”
She turns and shoves my shoulders, but her effort is tactless. “Our situation, Ryker? I was engaged to somebody that I thought I could love. Ian is kind, and loyal, and everything I’m not. Wearing the ring he gave me reminded me of what kind of person I am—what we are. Our situation is ugly and messy and destroying me.”
Ian’s name is meant to induce anger, the kind that bulges my veins and reddens my face. I channel everything I have in personal experience to feel what it’d be like for Ryker to witness the woman he loves more than life itself settle for someone because she doesn’t think she deserves happiness.
“You’ll never love him the same way.”
“Ryker, stop.” She closes her eyes.
“You’re guilting yourself.”
“Ry—”
“You love me, Beck. Me.” I slam my palm into my chest and step forward. “Our love is the truest kind because it’s so ugly. Nobody gets a happy ending easily. Ian isn’t meant for you. I am. He knows it. You know it. I know it.”
A single tear streams down her face, but she’s too stubborn to let me wipe it away. Instead, she steps back, reaching behind her and holding onto the cold railing that separates her from the night.
I see the pain shredding her up little by little, and my comfort would do nothing to hold the pieces together. She’s self-destructing because she once told me she didn’t love me before moving on to men who she tried her best to feel even the slightest bit of passion for.
“You’re torturing yourself,” I whisper, shaking my head and refraining from touching her damp cheeks. “You don’t have to anymore. I forgive you. I…” My eyes trail over to where Kinley watches the scene unravel. “I love you even if I shouldn’t, even when I remember every ounce of pain that our past brought us.”
Buchannan throws his hands up. “Cut! What the hell was that, Callum? You’re not supposed to look over here. I don’t give a shit if you love me. You’re supposed to deliver those lines to her—to Beck.” He curses and gets off his chair, shaking his head and walking over to one of the camera guys.
My eyes stay unblinking on Kinley, whose lips are parted as she stares back. Her hands are molded together on her lap, flexing, like she wants to say or do something but holds herself back.
I mouth, I remember.
Her eyes close for a moment before she slides off her chair … and walks away.
Something smacks my shoulder. “Dude, I was really feeling that scene and you had to go all method on us. What the fuck?”
Tipping my head back, I palm my eyes before stepping away from her. “I don’t know, Liv. I just haven’t been feeling myself lately.”
“Why? Is it Lena?”
“No.”
We walk over to where a couple chairs rest unoccupied and sit down. She doesn’t bother rebuttoning her jeans, just leaves them undone while still sporting a see-through belly shirt that shows off her toned stomach and black bra underneath.
“Is it about Kinley?”
My head snaps in her direction. “What did you just say?”
She rolls her eyes and combs her fingers through her blonde tresses. “There are a lot of stupid people here, Callum. I’m not one of them. She’s the only one who calls you Corbin. Usually you correct people or disengage. You let her though.”
Trying to play it off, I say, “So?”
She eyes me. “Did you miss the part where I stated that I’m not stupid? You two stare at each other all the time. It’s not like she’s starstruck either. In fact, I think she hates your guts which is kind of amazing.” She smiles when I flip her off. “That also probably means that you two know each other, and since Google is the world’s best friend, one little search could tell me if there’s a connection between the two of you.”
On high alert, I straighten in my seat. “I really don’t think—”
“You can hire people to delete your past, but the internet always has something.” Her nose scrunches a little, then she shrugs. “Lincoln, huh? I never pictured you in a place so … rural. Most of the pictures you get when you search the town are of cows.”
“Jesus.” My knee bounces with nerves until Olivia steadies it with her hand.
“Relax, Corbin. I’m not going to say anything to anybody.” Her head tilts. “Why did you try so hard getting rid of your ties there? The newspaper picture of you in the school play was all it took to do a few more searches until I got the bigger picture.”
“Does it matter?”
Liv rolls her eyes. “Just answer me this. What was she like back then?”
I want to look behind us where Kinley’s chair is, but I know she won’t be there. Blowing out a breath, I answer truthfully. “She hasn’t changed at all.”
Liv’s eyes brighten. “It’s pretty amazing if you think about it. Two well-known public figures came from the same small town.”
“I moved there my senior year,” I admit, studying the people setting the space back up where it was before I decided to stray from the script. Absentmindedly, I add, “Kinley became my best friend.”
“No shit,” Olivia breathes, sitting back in her chair and taking it in. “Guess that explains the familiarity between you. Wait—”
I look at her warily as a grin spreads across her face. Knowing what’s coming, I close my eyes and pretend I’m anywhere else. What happened between Kinley and I shouldn’t be discussed with co-workers.