Fuck me, she was never going to forgive me for this. I was surprised that she hadn’t tried to leave the penthouse or find one of my many guns that were stashed around this place and shoot me with it.
There had been one moment that I had thought about caving to her. It was the moment she had handed over her wedding rings, asking me to keep them safe. I hadn’t wanted to take them. I hadn’t wanted to even look her in the eye, knowing what was about to happen. Emma had told me she trusted me after I had gotten Noah back safe and sound, but I had destroyed that trust with this stunt.
What if she couldn’t forgive me? My chest ached and I rubbed it with my bruised hand, trying to rub away the ache that was far too deep. If Emma decided to leave, she might as well rip out my heart in the process. I didn’t want to know a life without her.
I don’t know how long I sat there, looking up at the sky and hoping that Emma wasn’t about to kiss my ass goodbye before the door opened again. I lifted my head to find Emma standing there, her arms wrapped around her waist. “I hated you,” she whispered. “I hated you the moment you shot him. I thought you didn’t love me. I thought you had led me all this way just to make me feel like your captive all over again.”
Her words tore through me and I steeled myself against the hurt that was about to happen. Emma had changed her mind. She wasn’t going to let me prove myself to her, and that was what I deserved. I had done this to myself, not her. Fuck me, I didn’t want to lose her, but I was man enough to let her walk away if she wanted to. I just wanted her happy. “You had every right to.”
“But,” she said after a moment. “In order for this to work, Artem, you have to be truthful with me. You can’t just go off and decide that I’m not worthy of knowing your plans. I don’t need to know all about what you do, but I do need to know when it’s going to impact me or my family. What you did today, it wasn’t right, but I can see through the hurt to what you tried to do, at least.” She then met my stare. “I need to know that you aren’t going to do this again, Artem.”
I stood and walked over to her, not touching her when I desperately wanted to. Instead I dropped to my knees before her. “A boss bows to no-one,” I told her. “He’s never to show his weakness or give any indication that he can’t handle his shit on his own.”
I reached up and grasped her hips, pulling her close until my forehead was pressed into her stomach. “I’m bowing before you now as a boss, a husband, the man that fucking loves you. A man that fucking screwed up and hates that he hurt you so badly. Please, give me a chance to try again.” I could make her happy. I could make her forget this day and only fill her life with good things from now on.
Okay, that was a stretch. She was married to a boss, after all.
Emma stiffened and I held my breath, wanting her to feel the implications of my words. I wasn’t allowed to do this. I lived with no weaknesses, no softness that would jeopardize my position.
But Emma was different. Emma deserved to have a man who could humble himself before his own wife from time to time and admit when he was wrong. I had been fucking wrong in what I had done to her.
Finally, after what felt like hours, her hand threaded through my hair. “Do you love me, Artem?”
I closed my eyes, my heart threatening to beat right out of my chest. “I love you, Emma. I love you more than my own fucking life. I would give anything to see you smile at me.”
“What if I wanted another shot at your eye?”
Grinning, I backed off to meet her solemn gaze. “We need to work on your right hook, love.”
She helped me to my feet, her hands resting in mine. “I hope that I won’t have to hit you again.”
“I’m not going to bet on it.” Hey, I could be an asshole sometimes.
“Don’t ever do that to me again,” she said softly, gripping my hands. “Don’t ever make me feel like I don’t matter to you. You do not know what that does to a person, Artem, especially one who had just found her happiness. I need your word that you won’t treat me like that for the rest of our lives, or we just need to do a clean split right here and now because I won’t put up with it any longer.”
I pulled her close, wrapping my arms around her. Like that was going to happen. I had no intention of her ever feeling like she needed to split from me ever again. I had screwed this up, but I wasn’t planning on making the same mistake in the future. “I promise to never treat you like you don’t matter. You matter a hell of a lot, Emma. You matter more than I could ever put into words.”
She sighed against my chest and I knew then that everything was going to be all right. We might have to work on it, but it was going to be all right in the end. Emma wasn’t going to leave me. “Can we go to bed, Artem?”
I pressed my lips to her temple. “Yes, love, we can.”
I led her to our bedroom and shut the door before remembering she had no other clothes. “I hope you like sleeping in the nude, Emma.”
She smiled. “If I remember correctly, someone else likes to sleep in the nude.”
Grinning, I kicked off my shoes. “Hell, yeah, I do, but if you want a shirt, I will find you one.”
Emma shook her head. “I just want to lie beside you, clothes or no clothes.”
I reached into my pocket, pulling out the rings she had given me for safekeeping. “Will you take these back, love?”
She nodded, and I felt the rest of my concern melt away as I closed the distance between us and took her hand, sliding on the rings. “I hope you never find a reason to take them off again,” I said to her as they fell in place. “I hope you always know that I love you and nothing in this world will ever change that.”
“Artem,” she whispered before I crashed my lips against hers. She tasted like wine and forgiveness and I wanted to drown myself in her. Somehow, we found the bed, and I crawled on top of her, keeping most of the weight off her body. “I’m sorry,” I said hoarsely. It wasn’t a word I said lightly, but to her, I needed to say it repeatedly.
I had nearly lost Emma. “I’m so fucking sorry.”
Her eyes teared up and she cupped my cheek, rubbing her thumb over my rough skin. Hell, if she looked hard enough, she would see the tears in my eyes too. I didn’t fucking cry about anything, but after nearly losing her, I was willing to shed some tears. The relief she had given me was indescribable.
“I know, Artem,” she finally said. “I know. We will work on it, okay? Together.”
“Together,” I repeated before I lost myself in her kiss once more.
I wasn’t going to fuck this one up.
Chapter 16
Emma