“I have no choice now.” Esher kept his eyes locked on the damaged gate. “I have to close it.”
His gaze finally shifted from it, landing on Keras, a wealth of concern in it.
“I am getting better,” Keras reassured him, wanting to alleviate his brother’s worry. “The Tokyo gate will be able to handle the strain.”
He wasn’t sure it would, but he didn’t want his brother to know that, didn’t want any of them to see his worries, aware that it might stop Esher from closing the gate or might push him too close to the edge again. Esher needed to hear that he was getting better, so Keras would keep telling him that.
Esher nodded, flexed his fingers at his sides and swallowed.
Aiko came to him and slipped her hand into his, held it gently as she looked up at him, her dark eyes warm with love and worry.
And fear.
Esher smiled tightly at her, stroked her hair with his free hand and swept it down to her jaw. He tilted her head up and bent to capture her lips, kissed her softly and slowly.
Keras averted his gaze to give them a moment of privacy.
It landed on Enyo.
She looked at him, heat building in her green eyes, heat that had him thinking about kissing her like that. How would she react if he did? Would she accept it as Aiko did? Would she reject him?
He told himself that she wouldn’t reject him.
He might have been blind to her feelings before, but there was no denying she felt something for him now.
There was no denying he felt something for her.
He wanted to kiss her.
Craved the feel of her in his arms again.
Hungered to know the taste of her lips at last.
Esher broke away from Aiko, pulling Keras’s focus back to him, and Keras steeled himself as Esher stepped forwards, approaching the gate.
Valen went with him, drew a short blade from the holster beneath his arm, and held it out to him. “We’re right here with you, buddy.”
Esher nodded and took the blade, sucked down a breath and blew it out as he held his left wrist out above the gate.
Flinched as he drew the blade across it.
Aiko rushed to him, fisted his wet shirt and pressed her forehead to his spine as she held him from behind.
Esher closed his eyes as blood dripped from his wrist, hit the gate and slowly began to spread across the horizontal rings, muting the colours.
Agonising minutes ticked past as Esher worked to seal it, an eternity in which he sliced his vein open two more times, in which Aiko wrapped her arms around him and clutched him tightly. Esher’s face twisted into a sneer and Aiko tightened her grip.
Keras moved forwards in time with Ares, placed his hand on Esher’s shoulder as Ares mirrored him, and gripped Esher tightly, showing his brother that he was there, supporting him in the only way he could.
Hoping it would keep him grounded and keep his other side at bay.
There was no telling what that side of Esher would do if it woke now.
Esher slashed his wrist a fourth time. Blood ran freely from the wound, splattering across the gate, dulling the colours of the rings as they rotated a few feet above the grass, taking the blood with them, spreading it for Esher.
The innermost ring began to contract, the gate pulsing as it sank into the central violet disc.
“It’s working,” Keras murmured and palmed Esher’s shoulder. “You’re doing great.”
On the other side of him, Ares did the same. “Almost there.”
Keras could feel it as the power the gate emitted stabilised and then began to fade.
Esher gritted his teeth and leaned forwards, and Keras held him upright, keeping him from falling. His brother snarled and bared fangs at him, crimson invading his eyes as he locked them on Keras.
And then he looked down at the delicate hands pressed against his chest.
His face crumpled and he dropped the blade, reached for Aiko’s hands with his free one and clutched them. He closed his eyes again and another ring receded.
The gate sparked with bright arcs of electricity and Esher grimaced.
“You’re doing great,” Ares whispered and rubbed his shoulder. “You have this. Just a little more.”
Esher nodded stiffly.
The gate settled again, but Keras could feel the drain on Esher’s strength, the effort it took to simply get it back under his control. Keras’s gut twisted and clenched hard. If it was taking this much effort to just control the damaged gate, was draining Esher this much, he didn’t want to think about how badly closing it would affect his brother.
He had the terrible feeling Esher was going to be asleep for a long time.
The next ring shrank into the gate, the power it emitted falling again, leaving only one ring left. It shone crimson, completely covered in Esher’s blood, and Esher wavered on his feet as it began to contract, the rotation of it slowing.
When it seeped back into the gate, the violet disc pulsed brightly and then grew darker, and darker as it too contracted.
It winked out of existence.
Keras couldn’t feel the gate.
Felt nothing as he stood there.
As Esher collapsed and he sank to his knees with him.
Aiko sobbed against his brother’s back, and Keras shifted his hand to her shoulder.
“He will be all right.” Words he couldn’t quite bring himself to believe, not as he gazed at his brother’s ashen face.
He willed Esher to be strong, to fight to return to Aiko, and to him.
Valen stepped forwards. “I’ll get him home.”
Keras nodded, grateful for his assistance.
He moved aside and pushed onto his feet as Valen helped Aiko onto hers. Ares took hold of her as Valen lifted Esher into his arms, and they all disappeared.
Keras lingered.
Enyo did too.
She came to him, silent but he could feel her support, felt it as strength that flowed into him as he stared at where Esher had been.
He had wanted to close a gate and draw the enemy out, but now that it had happened, he felt it was a bad idea. Fear for Esher and fear for what was to come combined inside him to strip him of the strength Enyo poured into him as she touched his hand, as her fingers grazed his palm and drew his gaze to her face.
He worried that Calistos was right.
He was being reckless.
And it had cost Esher dearly.
Tears filled his eyes as a thousand emotions erupted inside him, as they tore down his strength and seemed to consume every part of him, a whirlwind that had him spinning.
Lost.
Enyo gathered him into her arms.
Keras wrapped his around her and clung to her, the anchor he badly needed as he weathered a terrible storm, as he struggled to keep his head above water and stop himself from drowning.
From listening to that dark voice in his heart that whispered at him to find a pill—a pill would take this pain away.
She murmured softly into his ear.
“Let’s go home.”
Home.
He wanted to go there.
Not the home she spoke of, but the Underworld.
He wanted to be there again, away from this madness, this weakness that infested him, even when he knew he couldn’t escape it. Returning to the Underworld now wouldn’t solve anything. It wouldn’t turn back the clock. It wouldn’t free him of his problems.
He had to face them.
He held Enyo, breathed in her lilac scent and absorbed the warmth of her.
The strength she gave to him.
Strength he needed and would use.