Julie stared pointedly at his cup of saki, then no doubt followed that up with thoughts of him drinking whiskey at the bar.
“Don’t worry, sweetheart. I have much more self control than they have, and I have other vices to self-medicate with.” Off her somewhat concerned expression, he added. “Not drugs, either.”
Sex. Control. Domination. Power.
But that might be too much information for a first date.
“What about relationships?” he asked. “Any jealous ex-boyfriends who haven’t gotten over you that I should know about?”
“Ummm...” Suddenly she became very interested in her hibachi chicken and the finer points of chopstick usage.
“Julie?” He’d only been kidding. Was there a crazy ex to worry about?
“I... no.”
“Okay, you have to give me more than that. There’s a story there.”
“No, that’s the thing. There isn’t a story there,” Julie said. “I-I don’t have any exes.”
“What do you mean you don’t have any exes? You’re a grown woman. Religious upbringing or not, you aren’t a nun.”
“Well, in high school, my parents watched me like a hawk. They needn’t have bothered. I was... small for my age and...” she got flustered and trailed off.
The light bulb clicked on. “Undeveloped,” Gabe supplied.
She flushed. “Yes. And you know high school boys. They were into boobs. And as the boob fairy had not yet blessed me, I was spared their attentions.”
“Trust me, you didn’t miss much. High school boys are selfish lovers. I know, I was one once upon a time. But you look like a woman now, so what am I missing?”
“Well, I was busy with school. I didn’t have time to date. And then eight months ago I met this man I liked, so... I guess I was waiting for him to ask me out.”
God, this girl.
“I see.”
“Does that put you off?” she asked. “I mean, I know there’s a big age difference. And I’m not stupid. Despite the whole virgin fetish some guys have, I know most men get creeped out by it. I guess that’s another reason I haven’t dated. I feel like I’ve somehow missed my window. And with every month and year that passes, it gets weirder and weirder. If I’m not careful, the only suitable man for me will be a minister. Then at least I can say I was saving myself because of Jesus or something.”
He chuckled. “I really like you, Julie. Much more than I probably should.”
Gabe pulled up to the curb at Julie’s apartment, got out of the car, and went around to her side to help her out. He was pretty sure this was the last time he would see her.
“You’re much more of a gentleman at the end of the date than you were at the start,” Julie said.
“Oh? How so?”
“Well, I mean, you didn’t even come up to my door.”
Because he’d been planning his escape.
“Sorry about that.”
When they reached her door this time, they stood for a few long awkward moments. Finally, Gabe said, “Tell me you’ve at least been kissed before.”
She became very interested in her shoes. “When I was eleven.”
“So, no then,” Gabe said.
“Well, it was a boy. And he liked me. And it wasn’t my cousin or anything. I told you I keep missing my window.”
Gabe pressed her against the brick wall beside her door, and wrapped his hand around the back of her neck, pulling her close. He tasted her. Her lips parted beneath the onslaught of his kiss. She melted under him. Finally he pulled away. No woman had reacted that way to his kiss in a very long time. They were all too jaded and experienced and kinky for a simple kiss to mean so much. He found that he wanted to take this sweet innocent girl who knew nothing of love and mold and train her so that she didn’t know what was normal and what wasn’t, so that the only thing she cared about was that he kept touching her and approving of her.
“Well? Were you ever kissed before tonight?” he asked.
Julie was flushed and breathing hard. “N-no, never.”
In his imagination she completed that sentence with sir. Of course in real life she would never address him that way without prompting. Maybe not even then. Besides, he got sir from the girls at the house. He wanted master from this one.
Gabe turned to go. This was probably the best time to leave, all things considered. He had a lot to think about where Julie was concerned. He’d assumed he would have a war with himself over his next move. He hadn’t expected the situation would turn out to be this extreme. She was so inexperienced he was sure it would be nearly impossible to be sure she could ever really want to give him the things he wanted. She needed a nice normal man who wouldn’t demand too much of her. If Gabe was smart, he’d stop going to the bar and break off all contact.
It might hurt her. It might seem cruel to her, but it was mercy.
“Gabe, wait. Do you want to come in?” she asked, still a bit breathless.
He turned back to her. “Do you know what asking a man if he wants to come in after a date generally means?”
“Yes. God, I’m not stupid. And I haven’t been cloistered away in a convent. I’ve read books. I’ve watched movies. I have a roommate, though Stacy’s out right now... doing all this carnal stuff I’m apparently too innocent to understand. But I really mean... for coffee. Real coffee. Not coffee.” She used air quotes. She was so adorable.
He chuckled. “Yes, I’ll come in for coffee, but then I have to go.”
She fumbled a bit with her keys and then unlocked the door and led him inside. If he were the smallest percentage point more evil, this one act would have sealed her doom with him.
Julie flipped the light switch on and headed for the kitchen. “It’s late. Do you want decaf?”
“I’ll have whatever you’re drinking.”
The apartment was extremely tidy but sparsely decorated with cheap furniture that required assembly out of a box.
“Okay. Do you take cream or sugar?” she called from the kitchen.
“Black for me.”
While she busied herself in the kitchen, Gabe took a look around her apartment. School books lined the shelves. All the basics of math and science and history.
“You don’t sell your books back to the bookstore when you’re done?” Her apartment wasn’t in the worst part of town, but it also wasn’t in the best, and school books were expensive.
Julie poked her head out of the kitchen. “Oh, no, those are Stacy’s. She’s such a hoarder, I swear. But then... her parents are paying for most of her stuff, so I guess she can afford to be.”
Gabe wandered back through the apartment. “Which room is yours?”
“Oh God, it’s a mess, don’t go back in there.”
“I’m a nosy bastard. Indulge me.”
“Fine. Last door on the right, beside the bathroom. But I warned you.”
He expected to find a huge mess, but all he found was an unmade bed and some clothes draped over a chair. This was a mess to her? The room was simple with a few posters on the wall. Pictures of old world architecture, mostly. On the desk were some books and CDs.
When the coffee was ready, Julie brought it back to the bedroom and handed a mug of it to Gabe. It was a rich espresso roast.