“It was important to my mother, and apparently would have been to my father. Ever since Matthew died, all I have done is tried to be the man that he would have been. It’s you — and some reminders from others who know me well — who has finally made me realize that I cannot return to the past and change what happened to Matthew, and punishing myself for his loss will accomplish nothing. I can still be myself and make them proud. And being myself means being with you.”
“Truly?” she asked, her hands gripping his, and he nodded. “Absolutely.”
“What about… the fact that I was less than honest with you? I am sorry, Valentine, truly I am. I never knew I would fall in love with you, and I didn’t mean to deceive you in such a way. My intention was to help my father, but his mind was failing more and more quickly, and the next thing I knew I was doing all of the design, but I didn't want to tell you as I was afraid that you would think less of me. Once I knew that you wouldn’t, I was worried you would be angry with me for lying to you, which you were, so I—”
He placed a finger on her lips to stop her flow of words.
“I know,” he said, letting his hand fall back down to grasp hers once more. “I was angry, I will admit that. I have become rather paranoid in this new life of mine. Too many people have been proven to be taking advantage of me. It’s why I only hire those who knew me before I became duke. You were the first person I took a chance on, and when I thought you had deceived me, well… my anger got the best of me. It usually does.”
“I am truly sorry,” she said, her expression so remorseful that he could do nothing but release a low chuckle.
“I know, Rebecca,” he said, lifting her chin with his finger. He didn’t want her to feel such shame again. He had suffered from it enough throughout his life that he didn’t wish it upon the woman he loved. “And I understand.”
“You do?”
“I do,” he nodded.
“But what about your own debts? The dowry that you sorely need? I may be able to come up with enough, depending on how well this lottery goes, but I’m not sure it will ever equal that of a titled lady’s.”
He shrugged. “Well, first, we just may have to wait on some of those wonderful suggestions for Stonehall. I am not saying that we never do them but we—”
“Be prudent and wait,” she said, nodding with a smile. “I agree. And while Wyndham House does need to be finished, I have already planned it as inexpensively as possible, if you look—”
“I know, Rebecca,” he said with a small smile. “I noticed. And I appreciate it. I appreciate you, and the care you took for what I needed. But besides that, I believe I have found a man of business who will care much more than the old duke’s ever did. And stewards that are honest, who will manage the tenants with a firm yet understanding hand.”
“I’m glad,” Rebecca said with a true smile now. “You are a good judge of character, Valentine, and while I know this might not have been the life you imagined, you will do a fine job of it.”
“I’ll keep fighting for it, anyway — that, you can be sure of,” he promised. “I will also fight for you.”
“What are you talking about?” she said, her brow furrowed in confusion. “You already have me.”
“I mean that I will fight for you to be able to continue to do what you love,” he said and her eyes widened. “In all honesty, as a woman without formal training, you will likely never receive the commissions your father did. But I will make sure all know that you are the genius behind our own designs and I will solidly support you in whatever way I can.”
Rebecca cupped his cheek.
“Thank you,” she said, her smile turning from sad to one that showed her perfect, even teeth. “I do appreciate it.”
“Care to show me how much?
27
Rebecca had seen that wide, wicked grin on Valentine’s face before.
She knew exactly what it meant.
And she loved it.
“I would be happy to show you,” she said, matching his grin with one of her own. “Though I should hardly think that a boxing ring would be the place to do so, although I can see how that might fulfill some sort of wild fantasy of yours.”
He leaned back and laughed.
“You have no idea,” he said, trailing a finger down her cheek, “but, as it happens, there is a stairwell in this wing of the house that we could use without notice.” He cocked his head to the side. “Besides the odd servant who might be about, so we will just have to be careful, my future duchess.”
“That seems so strange to hear.”
“Now you know how I have felt for so long.”
He slid his hands down her arms to her elbows until he captured her waist with them, drawing her closer toward him until they were standing flush against one another.
“I cannot tell you how much I’ve missed you,” he said, resting his forehead against hers. “I saw you everywhere I looked in this house.”
“That's what you get for falling in love with the architect,” she smiled against his lips. She could feel his answering smile just moments before his lips came down upon hers, seizing her with more possessiveness than he ever had before. Rebecca understood it, for the same sense coursed through her. Every time they had been together before, there was a finality to it, as though it might be the last time they would ever be together.
But now — now, everything had changed.
She slid one hand around the back of his head, holding him close as they explored, tasted, and promised one another of all that was to come. Valentine bent and tucked one arm underneath her knees, picking her up without breaking contact. Finally, he ended the kiss, though Rebecca was aware it was only for a moment as he strode over and opened the door of the boxing room. He looked quickly back and forth in front of them, and, seeing no one about, had her up the stairs and down the corridor to his chamber so fast she hardly had time to be concerned about who might see them.
All worry fled, however, when he closed the door behind them, leaving the two of them alone in his room.
“It’s been a while since I’ve been in here,” she said, inching back toward the bed.
“We’ve come a long way since the first time we met,” he acknowledged, and she nodded slowly as her fingers came to the buttons of his shirt, for he wore no jacket and waistcoat. She liked that he refused to succumb to all that was expected of him and his station.
“When I saw you without your shirt on, I couldn’t take my eyes off of you,” she said, unable to meet his gaze as her cheeks warmed.
“Oh, and now you can?” he asked, laughter in his voice.
“It’s not that,” she said, baring his chest. “It’s only that now I know you so much better. When I close my eyes I can see your skin, know where your scars are located, and where the muscles meet one another. My fingers remember the planes of your chest, the ridges of your abdomen.”
“I must say, I do enjoy your hands upon me more than any other,” he said as he began to pull the pins out of her hair, and she stiffened at the thought of him with another woman. “Although most of the hands on my body these days are the knuckles of those who are attempting to beat me senseless.”