“You do not have to worry,” I cut her off with my response. “I am not going to force myself on you. If you don’t want me to touch you, then I won’t.”
“That’s not what I said—”
“You should go to the beauty parlor and pick out a nice dress for the night,” I continued. “I think we shall have dinner somewhere outside of the castle this evening.”
After I finished speaking, I turned away from Rachel and headed right out of the room, wanting to hide the aggravation that was spreading like wildfire across my features.
Chapter Ten
Rachel
Fuck.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
What the fuck did I just do? I inwardly groaned as I sat in a chair inside the beauty parlor, my heart sinking fast inside my chest.
When I’d turned Wexxon down in the library, I wasn’t trying to push him away. I just wanted to keep some part of my brain for myself, some place inside me that Wexxon wouldn’t have been able to touch. It’d been hard, and honestly, almost impossible, to regain any of my critical thinking skills, my abilities that’d gotten me that NASA internship, in the first place.
But when I was alone in the library with Palqeet, it was like I was able to think again. My mind felt so much clearer the further away I was from Wexxon, the less I let him touch me, let him fuck me. I’d wondered if that was the result of the connection, that obsessive, lingering feeling that Palqeet had told me about so many days before, if the reason my mind had been so cloudy was because Wexxon was always so close to me.
Although even when he wasn’t directly in the room, it was like he was somehow still there. Granted, he didn’t have such a hold on my thoughts as when he was right beside me, but those days he spent recovering by himself, when we weren’t sleeping in the same bed, I’d practically soaked my own bedsheets through with my own wetness. I’d been craving him so badly that I’d been desperately sliding my own fingers inside myself every night, moaning out his name as I rocked against my own hand.
Which was why I was crushed at the idea of Wexxon leaving me alone, heading out of the library like I’d offended him, like the straw had finally broke the camel’s back. I wanted to weep at the thought of him sliding inside another woman, taking her instead of me, her hips happily circling his cock, happy to have a chance to be fucked by Xelxar’s greatest warrior.
I then gently brought my arm down toward my stomach, resting the length of it across my abdomen. I wasn’t sure yet how long it was going to take for me to have our baby, but I knew that I’d begged Wexxon for a child, begged him to come inside me again and again that night I wore the red dress. And despite having a little more clarity, now that I was away from the man, I was still confused about how it seemed like I wanted two things at the same time.
How could I want to be a mother to Wexxon’s child while also want to escape Xelxar, too?
But both things were somehow true. I did want to escape Xelxar, which was why I’d asked Wexxon about learning how to read and getting a translator placed in my neck. When I finally had a chance to make a run for it, I didn’t want anything to be able to stop me, not an inability to read a map, not an inability to communicate with anyone who just happened to not have a translator installed.
But I also wanted to be Wexxon’s wife. I despised the idea of another woman taking my place, and I was overjoyed at the idea of providing him with a family, watching him play with our children as they grew older, watching them admire their father in battle at the arena.
“Fuck,” I cursed under my breath as I adjusted the fabric of the dress against my skin. I’d picked out a dark blue one this time around, although it was just as tight as the red one that I’d picked out before. There was also something different about the way it hugged my chest and waist, almost like the fabric had grown tighter around my frame.
Wait.
Grown tighter around my frame?
“Fuck!” I cursed again as a realization hit me in the moment, a small scream soon escaping my throat. I then turned to look at myself in the mirror, my hands going down to my waist, immediately noticing a change in my shape. And even though there wasn’t a baby bump just yet, my hips were full in a way they’d never been in my life. It was like I’d changed overnight, my thin frame shifting into more of a pear, my hips so much wider and my chest somehow more ample, too.
“What the fuck! What the fuck!” I couldn’t help but whimper at the strange woman looking back at me from the mirror. I knew that it was normal for women’s bodies to change while they were pregnant, but seeing myself go through the same process in mere days was fraying every last one of my nerves.
Was Wexxon even going to like me this way?
He’d seem interested enough, back when we were in the library, but hadn’t most of my frame been hidden behind a desk, then, too?
“Rachel?” Wexxon’s voice suddenly filtered into the room, his footsteps not too far behind. “Are you ready to leave the castle, my little warrior—”
“Don’t!” I shouted as soon as he turned into the parlor. “Don’t look at me.”
“First I cannot touch you, and now, I cannot look at you, either?” Wexxon shook his head as he stepped closer toward me. “Can I have none of you?”
“It’s not that. It’s just…” My words trailed off as I crossed my arms over my chest. “I don’t…I’m not the same.”
“What do you mean?”
“My body…” I tried to explain again. “It looks different.”
“Different?” Wexxon paused for a moment before a bright smile appeared on his face. “Ah. You’re going through The Change.”
“I’m guessing this is happening because I’m pregnant?” I mused.
“It happens to all pregnant females on Xelxar,” Wexxon replied. “Your body finds where it’s lacking and develops what it needs.”
“Where it’s lacking?” I frowned. “So, what? This is the planet’s way of telling me that I needed to gain a few pounds?”
“Your body will return to its natural state once you’ve given birth,” he continued. “Until then, however, you will change as much as our child needs you to.”
When he was finished speaking, Wexxon gently placed his hands over my own, moving my arms down and away from my chest.
He then offered me another smile, his eyes appreciatively glancing up and down my frame. “You’re just as beautiful as ever. If I was allowed to touch you, I would show you just how beautiful you are to me right now, my little warrior.”
“You can touch me—” I started to say, just as Wexxon moved his hands away from me.
And then, he was heading out of the room, motioning for me to follow right behind him.
I crossed my legs as Wexxon and I settled into our seats at what reminded me of a fancy, big city bar. Of course, there were major differences between the two, such as the see-through panels on the roof of the building that gave the perfect view of the Xelxar night sky, the kind of structure I’d only seen on Earth in places like NASA or government spaces. There was also the matter of the shimmering substances everywhere, as patrons imbibed drinks that made their throats temporarily glow with different colors. I even watched as a younger woman quickly took a drink, only to then let out a loud laugh, a small cloud of bright, pink glitter emanating from her mouth.