In fact, I think I’m falling in love with him. And truthfully, I’m okay with it. He treats me well, calls me out on my shit, and wants the best for me. I’ve never had a man make love to me and please me in the ways Eli has. We understand each other on a higher level, and over the past few days, I’ve seen a side of him I never imagined. Elijah Ross is the whole damn package, and I want him in my life forever.
The movie ends, and another begins. This time, it’s about a couple who grew up together, lost touch, and are now back in the same town. If I wasn’t so out of it, I’d think it was cute and would be more invested in the story. However, I drift in and out of sleep and go from being ice cold to blazing hot. No matter what I do, I can’t get comfortable. At some point, I wake up and check my temperature, noticing it dropped some. My phone buzzes on my nightstand, and when I grab it, I see it’s my brother. I desperately answer it.
“Just seeing how you are.” He sounds exhausted.
“Fever’s high. Chills and sweats. I’ve taken Tylenol every six hours like clockwork, but it doesn’t seem to do anything. Drinking water. I’m eating, though I’m not hungry,” I explain.
“Seems like you’re doing everything you can. I wish there was something more I could say, sis, but there’s not. Make sure you try to walk around some. It won’t be easy, but it’ll keep your lungs functioning. You’ll be tired, and your fever will probably stay high for a week, maybe a little longer, but keep an eye on it. If it doesn’t go down and your coughing worsens, go to the ER.” He recites it as if he’s repeated that dozens of times to his patients.
I blow out a frustrated breath, feeling overwhelmed by everything he’s said. “I’m going to be okay, right?” I know he can’t answer with certainty, but I still want some comfort from him because he’s seen different scenarios from those who’ve tested positive.
“I’m sure you will. If you feel like you can’t breathe, try rolling onto your stomach. It’s helped some of my patients,” he explains. “Stay hydrated. If you’re cold, don’t cover yourself unless you want your fever to increase.”
I laugh, kick off the blanket and pull the sheet over my body. He knows me so well.
“You’re your own best advocate with your health. If something isn’t right, tell Eli and call your doctor. Most are able to recover from home without major complications, just watch for signs. You know you can text me anytime, too.”
“I know.”
“How’s Eli doing? Keeping his distance from you?” I’m sure Ryan is just as concerned about Eli as I am.
“As far as I know he’s okay. Staying away from me but helping from afar.” I wait a few moments. “How are you?” I ask.
He lets out a lengthy breath. “Good as I can be. Not sure how much longer my colleagues and I can keep working these back-to-back shifts, but we’re short a few doctors because they ended up getting too sick to work. Luckily, we’ve had teams of medical staff fly in from other states to help.”
That’s the most I’ll get out of him about his well-being and don’t push any further because I can only imagine what he’s seen or had to do. It’s a war zone out there. Ryan has been training to save lives for years, but he wasn’t prepared for a pandemic. None of us were.
“Please take care of yourself,” I plead. He’s my best friend, and I can’t imagine losing him.
“You too, Cameron. Call me when your mind wanders and you’re in freak-out mode. I’ll try to calm you down. Don’t forget to take your meds. It might help with your anxiety,” he says sincerely. A deep voice speaks to him in the background. “I’ve gotta go. I’ll check on you as soon as I can.”
“Sounds good. Thank you,” I offer. “Love ya, bro. Take care.”
“Love you too.”
The call ends, and I sit in silence. Uneasiness and fear build inside me, and the walls seem as if they’re closing in.
I’m having a panic attack.
Lying down, I close my eyes and try to steady my breathing, trying to slow my racing heart. I count down from ten, breathe slowly through my nose, and release it through my mouth. It takes several times before I come back to earth and gain control.
My throat’s dry, so I take sips of water, but even that’s exhausting. Eventually, I fall asleep thinking about Eli. Though I’m not the praying type, I send one up, begging he doesn’t get sick. The realization that we were never safe is like a giant slap in the face, and I wish more than anything this wasn’t happening.
Chapter Twenty
ELIJAH
DAY 18
Three days have passed since Cameron started running a fever. I’ve wanted to do nothing but hold her in my arms and tell her everything will be fine, but I can’t. All I can do is make her food, leave it in the hallway, and write sweet notes on stationery I found in the kitchen. When I go to her door, I hear her dry cough and that she’s gasping for air. I want to burst inside her room and confirm she’s okay, but I also understand the severity of the situation. Cami’s already warned me, more concerned about my asthma than anything else, and I don’t want to upset her further.
Her cough sounded worse this morning, so I called Ryan again. He didn’t answer, but I know he will as soon as he can. I keep my phone on me and charged at all times, making sure the sound is up just in case Cami needs anything. She hasn’t asked for much help, and I don’t know if it’s because she’s too proud or if I’m doing such an outstanding job of keeping her stocked full of water and food that she doesn’t need anything.
Sometimes, I pace in front of her room. Other times, I sit with my back against the door and just talk to her. She responds, but I can tell she’s weak and tired. I’ve never felt so hopeless in my life.
Chanel has rubbed against my legs and jumped on my lap so many times she’s learned how to guilt me into giving her double treats and wet food. She sometimes meows outside of Cami’s door, which makes her laugh. Last night, she watched the news and learned some tigers in a zoo tested positive, and although there’s conflicting evidence confirming that, she won’t allow Chanel inside her room anymore to be on the safe side. The cat and I have bonded over being locked out, and I’ve tried to keep my mind busy by taking Bruno on extra walks as much as possible for fresh air. It’s still cool and crisp outside, and I can’t wait for spring.
When I’m sitting still is when the fear of what’s going on around me settles in. Cami could have the virus. I want to constantly ask how she is, but I also don’t want to be annoying.
My mind wanders further, and I can’t stop thinking about the night we spent together. I’ve never experienced chemistry like this with anyone, except her.
Something changed between us, and we haven’t been able to explore it further since she got sick. I haven’t mentioned us being together, and the silence has me doubting everything. In the back of my mind, I’ll never be good enough for her or her family’s standards. I don’t have the social status her parents require, and Cami’s always been out of my league. I’m still scraping by financially and hope that eventually changes, but the future is unknown at this point. Even if I got promoted, I don’t think her father would approve because I don’t have a trust fund to pay for everything.