I had to be with him. I had to live my life with James Graham. There was just no other option. Nothing else was acceptable. I wished I could turn into a deck of cards so I could live in his pocket.
"If you ever move to Texas, we could share him," I said, joking but not joking.
"Sharing a goldfish sounds tricky," he said.
"No, he'd just stay one week at my house and then the next at yours."
"If I lived in Texas, huh?"
"Yeah. You know, if you ever moved here or whatever."
James smiled but we were approaching his truck so he didn't say any more about it. He had picked me up for the party at Jessica's, so we were riding together. We went straight to his truck after we left her house. I would obviously be in charge of looking after the goldfish while he drove. James waited for me to get settled in my seat before handing me the bowl.
"I'll have to get you some food for him," James said. "I don’t know where to do that on Christmas. I guess if worse comes to worst, you could just flush him."
I gasped, and held the bowl closely, protectively, but I was just kidding, and he knew it. I had flushed a few failed pet goldfish in my day, and I knew it wouldn't be the end of the world if I couldn’t keep him alive, but I still hoped I could.
"I wonder if I could feed him lettuce. Lettuce seems like a thing fish could eat. I think I have some in my fridge."
"I have no idea," James said. "I thought of a cracker or something, but lettuce might be better. Are you a lettuce man, Jimmy?" James peered into the bowl like he was talking to the fish.
"He said he is," I said, answering for Jimmy. "But you know what? I forgot about Evelyn. Abby's friend. She's got fish. She's got like two different tanks in her room. I could just ask her for some food till I’m able to go to the store and get some myself. You wanna go by there?"
"By Evelyn's?" he asked.
I nodded.
"Now?"
"Unless you don't want to," I said.
"No, yeah, sure. Just tell me how to get there."
James and I ended up staying at Evelyn's for longer than expected. She had some family in town visiting, and her uncle got to talking to James about cars while I was in Evelyn's room, learning about fish. She had some other goldfish in one of her tanks, and I almost left Jimmy there so he could make some friends, but I couldn’t do it. I thought of him as being James's, therefore I loved him.
Evelyn gave me tips about keeping him alive, including getting a bigger bowl, which I knew I could order from my dad's wholesale catalogue. She sent me on my way with enough food to get me through a week or two.
We found ourselves on the way back to my apartment. It was a place I was renting from a man my dad knew. I figured I might end up moving back in with my parents now that I was going back to school, but my lease wasn't up until March, so for now, I had my own apartment.
I wasn't sleeping there tonight, though, since it was Christmas Eve. I would stay with my parents. But James and I had plans to stop by my apartment first so that I could finally get the goldfish on solid ground.
James knew where my place was and he left Evelyn's heading there. I lived in a large house that had been split into multiple apartments. It was in a nice neighborhood, and many of the houses on our block were decorated with lights and Christmas decorations. I always loved seeing holiday decorations in Galveston. Wintertime stuff next to palm trees was a cool looking contrast.
I stared out of the truck window as we went down my street, holding Jimmy carefully and feeling content and happy.
"I love my gifts tonight," I said. "I know it was supposed to be a white elephant exchange or whatever, but I scored. A Bible and a pet fish, I feel like it's the best Christmas ever."
"It is the best Christmas ever," he said.
"Oh, noooo," I let the phrase come out of my mouth in a deflated moan as I stared out of the window.
"What?"
"My house," I said.
"What about it?" James asked, looking around with a concerned expression.
"It's Michael. His truck. I see it."
"How do you know."
"I just know."
"You think he's at your house?"
"He's got to be." I got to the edge of the seat as James drove slowly by Michael's truck, which was parked on the street in front of my house. He drove slowly, both of us looking all around. "I didn't see him in the truck," I said as he pulled into my driveway.
James parked strategically so my housemates could get out.
"Are you sure it was his truck?" James asked.
"Yes. But I didn't see him in it. I don't know what's going on."
"Have you talked to him recently?"
"No. Not in months. Last I heard, he moved to Houston and was getting into all sorts of trouble."
James had a pistol under the driver's seat of his truck, and he tucked it somewhere behind his coat. He didn't mean for me to see him do it, but I caught sight of him tucking it in there as I closed the door and walked around the front of the truck to meet him.
We were walking to my house when my car door opened. My car was parked close enough that we heard and saw the movement as Michael got out of my driver's seat, surprising both of us. James put his hand out to shield me when he realized what was happening.
"What are you doing in my car?" I asked.
"It was unlocked," Michael said, staring straight at me. "And it smelled like you, baby."
I felt James tense and heard him take a deep calming breath in and out as we regarded Michael.
"You're not supposed to be here," I said.
"He's not supposed to be here," Michael said, pointing at James.
"Yes, he is," I said, moving to stand a little closer to James, behind him, really, letting him shield me.
"I heard this guy was at Marvin's party, and I just had to come see for myself."
Michael couldn't even look at James. He was staring at me. He was serious, mean looking, staring intently. He cussed, interjecting an expletive in just about every sentence.
"Don't you see what's going on here, Laney? Isn't it obvious?"
"Isn't what obvious?"
"He set me up. This guy set me up because he wanted this to happen. Don’t you see it? I told you it wasn't my fault. I told you. And you can't even see it now that he's trying to come in here and act like he's some kind of hero. Well he's not. He knew that woman. He set me up. I can't believe you believe his lies over me."
Michael looked terrible. He was thin and his hair was grown out, and not in a good way. He was scraggly looking, like he'd been drinking or doing drugs. Under different circumstances, I might have believed him. But not now. I knew James's character, and there was just no way Michael was telling the truth.
"Thank you for telling me. I'll take that into consideration," I said, figuring I'd try to take the path of least resistance in an effort to get him to leave.
James hadn't said anything, but I could feel how tense and rigid he was. I balanced the fishbowl in one arm and put my other hand in the crook of his arm to let him know I was undaunted by all of this.