He understood and moved over her until he covered her once more. Sometimes he asked her if she was ready. Not tonight. She knew why—any words between them could break this spell.
Neither of them wanted that.
As he sank into her, she pushed up to welcome him, and a sweet ache lanced through her chest as her heart embraced the truth she hadn’t been able to see these past few days.
She loved Cole.
Loved him.
A few harsh words, a misunderstanding—nothing like that would ever come between them. He loved her, too. She knew that with all her heart and soul. Fran—she nearly laughed. Fran was a ridiculous episode from his past.
So why was she trying to use the woman to add fuel to the flames of discord between them?
Cole moved inside her with a rhythm she joined instinctively, and she let thought go again, willing to move forward on trust that what felt so right couldn’t lead them astray. As Cole increased his pace and the delicious friction between them heated up, she gave herself over to it, letting the tension build up until she crashed over into ecstasy like a wave on the sand. As pleasure pulsed through her again and again, and she felt Cole crash into her in the throes of his own release, Sunshine forgot her body and moved straight into the light and heat they’d built between them.
Nothing but this mattered. Nothing but this was true.
If there was pain in her heart, Cole hadn’t put it there.
As Sunshine came back to herself, slack and panting on the bed, still encircled in Cole’s arms, she realized it was true: there was pain in her heart, and she’d put it there.
And she was the only one who could get it out again.
Chapter 7
“Sunshine?” Her stillness worried Cole and he braced himself on his elbows, trying not to crush her.
“I love you.” Her whisper feathered over him. For some reason her words scared him even more. He sensed a ‘but’ in there somewhere.
“I love you too.”
“I haven’t been honest with you.”
Cole swallowed in a suddenly dry throat. “Okay.” He pulled out and shifted off of her, and Sunshine sat up. He could make out the shape of her, but he couldn’t see details. He reached for the light but she stopped him.
“It’s about my work.”
Cole felt a rush of relief. He could handle anything that had to do with cooking. As long as Sunshine wasn’t going to leave him—
He went cold. Was she going to leave him? Was this what the trouble between them was really about?
“I thought I’d made up my mind. I chose Chance Creek, and you, and the idea of having a family.”
“But…” He knew it was coming.
“But I’m a chef, Cole. I’m not just a cook, I’m not just an entrepreneur. I’m a chef.”
“I know.” He did know. Unfortunately, he knew all too well what she was saying. It was why he’d rushed to buy a restaurant here and tried to make it perfect—because deep down he knew what Sunshine needed wasn’t in Chance Creek. He’d hoped if he could tie her up with a property and a job, she might forget the rest of her dreams. “So, you want to go back to Chicago.” He felt as if something was dying inside him. Ultimately, he wanted to make Sunshine happy. If she wanted to go, he’d go. He sure as hell couldn’t watch her walk away.
“No.”
Her quiet word didn’t sink in at first. “No?” he repeated. Had he heard that right?
“I don’t want to go back to Chicago. The thing is—I want it all. I want Chance Creek, I want land, and space and room to roam, I want a family, and I want to be… famous.”
He laughed. She’d finally said it out loud. He realized he’d known it all along even though she’d never put it into words.
“I talked to Autumn, Fila and Camila today.”
All women involved in the food business. Cole nodded. That was a sensible thing to do.
“There could be a way for me to get what I want right here.”
Hope blossomed within him. “Really?”
“Yeah. I’d still need a restaurant—”
He nearly let the cat out of the bag right then. “Okay,” he managed to say instead.
“And we’d need somewhere to live.”
“Yep.” He’d start looking first thing.
“But most of all…” She faltered, but then rushed on. “I’d need your help, Cole.”
“I’ll help. I can renovate and install appliances…”
“With the kids.” She spoke over him. “I want more than one. But I can’t be at home with them. Not all the time.”
Cole sat back, as if he’d had the wind knocked out of him. He thought about Jack slipping out the sliding glass door and the way he’d snapped at Sunshine for not watching him closely enough. “I don’t know anything about kids.”
“Neither do I.”
“But you’re a girl. It comes naturally.”
“It would for you, too. You’ll be their father.”
Suddenly Cole felt like he was sliding underwater, firm ground nowhere to be found. “I need a job. Someone has to pay for all of this stuff.” He was grasping at straws.
“We both need jobs. I don’t think either of us would be happy without them.”
“Then what are you asking?”
“That we share the child care.”
Cole didn’t know what to say to that. He’d never pictured himself spending his days with children. His father had never done that. Sure, Cole had tagged along after him as a kid—a lot. He stopped to consider that. Boys growing up on the ranches around here spent more time in the barns with the men than they did by their mother’s side once they reached a certain age. But if Sunshine needed help right away, he’d have to start earlier than most—and rustle the girls as well as the boys. Could he do that?
He hadn’t even figured out how to make a ranch profitable.
Cole scratched his head, more uncomfortable than he wanted to admit. “Can I think about it?”
“Of course.” But Sunshine sounded sad.
“Give me one day to wrap my head around it.” He leaned forward and snatched a kiss. “I love you. There’s not a lot I wouldn’t at least try.”
“I know.” Her hand caught his and held it. The tension in her body told him how important it was.
He wished he could agree to what she’d asked right now, but it was too big a question to guess at the answer.
And the truth was, he didn’t know if he could be the man Sunshine wanted him to be.
“It’s so good to be back in Chance Creek,” Hannah Matheson said when she took Sunshine for a walk around the Double-Bar-K the next day. She’d driven herself over in the rental truck after Jake had come by and picked up Cole. She’d enjoyed the time alone. While the feeble sunshine left something to be desired this far into December, Sunshine felt like she’d been scrubbed clean. She’d done what she could do. The rest was up to Cole.
Cole hadn’t talked much this morning, but he’d held her for a few minutes before they went downstairs, and kissed her softly. She was so grateful for his touch after their days apart, she’d almost cried. After leaving their things in yet another bedroom, Sunshine found herself with Hannah, whom she’d never met. A happy, confident blonde, Hannah’s frank friendliness instantly charmed her. Spending the day with a stranger could be awkward, but she had the feeling they’d do fine.