“Oh, hun,” Cecilia said. “You look pale as a ghost. Do you need water? That costume can be stiflingly hot.”
I cleared my throat and backed away from the group. “I’m… I’m fine. Just a little warm. I’ll be right back.”
I made my way up to my apartment to change out of the Mrs. Claus outfit, but not before stealing a final peek over my shoulder where I discovered Helena already scooting closer to Chris, their shoulders nearly brushing.
I had to admit, they looked good together. Like they belonged on the cover of a magazine. She was everything I wasn’t—tall, poised, classy, sophisticated. She was the petite filet mignon while I was a ground chuck bacon burger.
I knew they weren’t together. Chris wasn’t that kind of guy. He wasn’t the type to sleep with me one night and then turn around the next day to reunite with his ex. But I couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling that I didn’t belong with him. I didn’t belong in his world or in this board meeting. I was the manager of a store, not a suit in a high-rise building making the million-dollar decisions.
Chris would eventually end up with a woman like Helena… and I’d still be here. Dressing in ugly sweaters and running small town contests while another woman puts on this very Mrs. Claus costume and sits by Chris’s side while he plays Santa.
And I would be on the sidelines again. Watching as another family gets the joyous Christmas wish I’d always wanted.
A few hours later, Kringle sat on my bed, staring at me as I finished my makeup with a final sweep of the eyeshadow brush over my eyelid. “What’s wrong?” I asked him as he tilted his head at me. “Is the dark eye shadow too much?”
With a bark, he stuck his big yellow butt in the air, assuming a playful stance, tail whipping around.
I sighed. “That’s what I thought.” I almost never wore eye shadow… and because I didn’t know how to apply the crap, it kept going on unevenly. So, I had to add more to the other eye to balance it out. Then more to the other… and so on and so forth.
Too late now, though. I was due at Chris’s house in five minutes and there was no time to redo my makeup.
I spun in front of the mirror, giving myself a final once-over. I didn’t look bad. I just didn’t look like me. My red pencil skirt and tailored white shirt were pretty and festive, but still professional. Chris said most of the men and women at the party would likely wear business attire, and this red pencil skirt was the closest thing I had to that.
Even if I would have preferred to wear a sexy dress for Chris… tonight was about business. About expanding the store and maybe finally getting the respect I was due from more than just Jack and Cecilia, but from the rest of the board.
“Wish me luck, Kringle.” I bent and pressed a kiss between his big, floppy ears and chuckled at the sight of the red lipstick smear I left on his forehead. Guess he was going to be getting a bath tonight.
I arrived at Chris’s house ten minutes after seven. Just a tad late, which according to Lyla was perfect. Do not arrive right on time, she scolded me. Which seemed completely counter-intuitive, but even with my ten-minute tardiness, the driveway only had a small handful of cars parked… clearly others had the same intention of being fashionably late.
Chris opened the door and his eyes went wide, sweeping down my body. “You look beautiful.” He leaned in to kiss me, but I quickly countered the movement, stepping back. His brows dipped and was that…? Did he look hurt? “What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Nothing,” I whispered, stepping inside his foyer and sliding out of my wool coat. “I’m just… I’m here to present my ideas to the board in a professional capacity and I don’t want them knowing about us.”
He jerked back, physically putting space between our bodies. “You don’t want them knowing about us?”
“Yet,” I added quickly. Crap, this was not coming out right. “I just want them to see me give my presentation as Avery Pinkerton, Manager of the flagship store. Not Avery Pinkerton, Chris’s fling.”
His expression fell, his face paling as he stared at me in awe. “My fling? Is that what you think of me? Of us?”
“No…” My throat tightened as I looked up into his eyes. “I don’t know.” I dropped my voice to a whisper and looked over my shoulder to make sure no one was around listening in. “I don’t really know what we’re doing. At some point you’re going to want to go back to your high-rise apartment in Boston, and I’ll still be here. As your employee.”
Chris took a deep breath, his eyes drifting momentarily closed. “We should talk. A long talk about what this means… you and me. But you’re right, it shouldn’t be tonight. Tonight’s about the store, our jobs, and your great ideas. Not about us.”
I gulped as a caterer walked by with a tray of champagne flutes. She was wearing nearly the exact outfit I was… a red skirt and white button-down shirt. “Oh my God,” I whispered, dropping my face into my hands. This was humiliating.
“What is it?” Chris asked.
Were men really this oblivious? The cater waitress bent slightly so I could reach the glasses on her tray and smiled sympathetically at me. “The Gap, right?”
I sighed and nodded. “Their Black Friday sales this year.”
Understanding finally flashed across Chris’s face. I guess I couldn’t blame him… he’d probably never shopped at the Gap in his entire life. And he’d certainly never had to frequent the clearance racks. “Hey,” he said, hooking his pinky into mine with a small squeeze. “You look great. Beautiful.”
“Thanks,” I whispered. But I wasn’t sure I believed him. How beautiful could I look when all I needed was a tray to carry and I’d be indistinguishable from every cater server here?
Chris smiled and took two glasses off of the tray, thanking the server before handing me one. “To us… and our business partnership. No matter what happens between us, I can’t imagine a more capable person to run our flagship store. Knock them dead tonight, Cindy Lou Who.”
As he clinked the edge of his champagne glass to mine, my heart felt heavy, though I knew rationally it shouldn’t. Chris had given the perfect toast, all things considered. He was respectful of my wishes to keep tonight about business and keep our relationship quiet for now. And he agreed to talk about us later. So why was my stomach sinking?
That’s the funny thing, sometimes it takes getting what you think you wanted to realize it’s not what you wanted at all.
Chapter 18
Chris
Fling. I couldn’t get that word out of my head. Or the way Avery had pulled away from me. A few days ago, if you had asked me if I would prefer a one-night stand or a girlfriend… without a doubt, I would have chosen a one-night stand.
But Avery was different in all the best ways. And if these past few days had proven anything to me, it was that I was better because of her. I didn’t know what our relationship would look like or how it would work… I only knew I wanted to try. I wanted Avery.
My dad settled beside me where I stood in front of the fireplace. It was the best view of the room… or rather the best view of Avery where she was currently making small talk with our marketing director. “So,” Dad said, rocking back on his heels. “You missing Boston?”