Once I’m done for today, I get off the machine and wipe my face. Opening a water bottle, I check my phone. Dozens of different messages and notifications have appeared since we got here, but I ignore them until one in particular catches my attention, knocking the air out of my lungs.
Smalls: Sorry, it’s been a long day. Talk tomorrow?
“You done?” My head snaps up at Prescott’s question. He wipes the sweat off his beet red face as he waits for my answer.
Locking the phone, I turn to my friends. “You know what? I’ll do a few miles on the treadmill.” They give me curious looks, but don’t comment further. We pump our fists in goodbye. “See you later.”
The message is still on my mind as I pick up my things and walk to the row of treadmills on the other side of the gym.
Jade has been awfully quiet this past week, and I was starting to worry. I wanted to go home to visit, but classes have picked up, and although the football season is officially over, I can’t skip classes or let my grades slip. That would go against all the promises I made, and I can’t do it. I can’t disappoint her. But it seems that no matter what I do, which path I take, somebody will always end up hurt.
I hop on and start with a slow walk as I always do.
I haven’t even been at it for a minute when the door to the gym opens. My head snaps up, and I almost fall off the treadmill when I see Yasmin standing in the doorway.
“Oh… I’m sorry, I didn’t…”
Yasmin looks almost as startled as I feel. One foot inside, the other out. It’s like she’s stuck and doesn’t know if she wants to enter or run the hell away.
“Stay,” I say before I can think better of it, but I don’t want to risk her running away before I can even think to open my mouth.
This is the first time we’ve been together since I tried apologizing to her, and she told me to leave. Since then, I’ve tried to respect her wishes, and except for our class together, I haven’t seen her.
But I wanted to. Oh, how I wanted to. That night is still haunting me, and no matter how much I try to reason that I’m doing the right thing by respecting her wishes, I can’t forget about it. Can’t let go.
“I…” she starts but stops. I can practically see her brain work as she tries to decide if she should stay or leave.
Finally she nods and enters. The sound of the door closing echoes in the otherwise quiet room.
Yasmin moves closer, but still makes sure to leave enough space between us. I watch from the corner of my eye as she steps on the treadmill and plays with a few buttons before the slow hum of the machine joins mine.
“I didn’t know you ran.”
The words come out before I can stop them. She looks at me, and then quickly turns away.
“You don’t know a lot about me.” Her voice is soft, but I can see that stubborn lift of her chin, as if she’s daring me to contradict her.
“And you do about me?” I shoot right back.
Yasmin’s head snaps to look at me. Those dark eyes of hers, that always seem to see more than they should, stare at me silently for a minute. I expect her to snap back at me; after all, that’s what we’re best at, taking until there is nothing else left to give. But she surprises me with a slight tilt of her head. “Touché.”
After that we’re both quiet. I switch from a fast walk into a full-on run, and after a while she does the same. I’m not sure how long we’re at it, I don’t bother to look down at the time, just let my body do the thing it knows how to do the best.
My eyes are boring into one spot on the wall as I force my body to move. My muscles scream from exertion, but my heart welcomes the physical pain.
The silence is comforting, but at the same time, there is also this tension between us. All the things that I want to say, but can’t. All the questions I want to ask her, but know won’t be received well.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
The beeping of the machine breaks me out of my thoughts. My breathing is elevated, and I can feel the sweat dripping off my face. I look around and notice that Yasmin slowed down her jog to a slow walk to cool down.
Taking the towel off the handle, I wipe my face and decide to call it a night too.
My legs feel like noodles once I step off the treadmill, exhaustion finally setting in. I grab my water bottle and empty half of it. For the first time all night my eyes fall on the watch around my wrist.
When did it get so late? It feels like I just got here, but it’s already close to midnight.
The door squeaks open, and my head snaps up just to see Yasmin slipping outside.
“Yasmin, wait.” She stops but doesn’t turn around. “Are you going to the dorm?”
“Yeah.”
Throwing the towel over my shoulder, I grab my things and go after her. “I’ll walk you.”
She looks over her shoulder at me, her eyes narrowed into tiny slits. I swear I can see smoke coming from her ears. “I don’t remember…”
“It’s not up for discussion,” I say, not giving her time to finish. “I either walk you, or I’ll walk after you. Take your pick.”
She stares at me, clearly irritated, but I don’t back down. Not on this. Blairwood might have a small and relatively safe campus, but it’s too late for her to walk around all by herself.
“Fine,” she finally agrees. “Five minutes.”
Chapter Eleven
YASMIN
When I get out of the changing room, Nixon is already there, leaning against the wall, leg propped on the hard surface, waiting for me. It’s like he’s expecting me to run away without him. He wouldn’t be completely wrong, because the idea might have crossed my mind.
His head snaps up when he hears the door open, eyes landing on mine as he pushes off the wall. “Ready to go?”
My hand is gripping the door like my life depends on it. I force myself to loosen my grip and let go.
“You don’t have to, I’m capable of walking myself back to the dorm.”
“I didn’t say you weren’t, but this isn’t up for discussion,” he grits through clenched teeth and pulls open the door for me.
I’m not sure what’s with this whole situation. The other night he didn’t give a rat’s ass if I walked home alone or not. Why bother now?
I step out, a shiver going through my whole body when we step into a cold night. Burrowing deeper into my scarf, I wrap my arms more tightly around myself.
Turning around on the balls of my feet, I face him. “You’re infuriating.”
“And you aren’t any better.”
We stare at each other for a while. “Let’s just go.”
Not waiting for his answer, I start walking to my dorm. It’s an easy fifteen-minute walk from the gym to the dorm, but I know if I hurry, I can make it in ten.
The campus is mostly quiet, without a soul in sight. After years of living in a city which is always buzzing with activity and life, it’s hard to get used to this… stillness. It feels unnatural.
When I see my building in front of me, I sigh in relief. Just a little while longer, and I’ll be safely inside.
“We’re here, you’re free to go,” I say just as Nixon wraps his fingers around my hand to stop me from going inside.