It’s a sad little story, but please don’t feel sorry for me (there’s enough of that going around town). My grams has even named it “Annie’s Unfortunate Incident” like I’m some character in a Lemony Snicket novel. Even though it happened four years ago, it’s like the people in this town can’t get over it.
At this point, I think I need to mention that I’m “pre-engaged” to the man I’ve been dating for the past three years. Walter is a lawyer, and he’s about to make partner at his firm, which is a huge deal for him (for both of us really), and it’s just not the best time to be spending a lot of money on an engagement ring. Which I’m perfectly fine with.
This brings me to the fact that I feel pretty silly writing a complete stranger when I’m in a relationship with someone else, but something has felt off between Walter and me for the past few months (for the past few years, if I’m being truthful) and ever since I saw you on Single Gal I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.
Which makes me wonder if maybe Walter isn’t the right guy for me. On paper, he’s perfect, but in real life … I don’t feel that “zing” with him. I never have. I do love him. I’m just not in love with him. And deep down, I don’t think he’s in love with me either.
Wow.
I just figured it all out.
I have to break up with Walter.
Strangely enough, I’m not upset. I’m totally at peace with this decision, so I guess writing this letter to someone I’ve never met before has helped me figure things out.
Thanks, Sam. Best of luck to you.
Sincerely,
Annie Esposito
PS Not to brag or anything, but every Sunday I do the New York Times crossword puzzle, and last week I finished it in under an hour and twenty minutes (my personal best time!). Okay, yeah, I’m totally bragging.
A knock on the door made her jump. Without waiting for an answer, Bridget strolled into her office as if she owned the place. Annie gave the other woman her fiercest scowl. “Haven’t you ever heard of waiting until you get permission to enter?”
Bridget perched her bottom on the edge of Annie’s desk. “How was dinner last night?”
“What’s it to you?”
“I know you think I’m just the heartless office busybody, but I only get involved because I care.” Bridget fluttered her eyelashes in a way that made Annie laugh.
“Right.”
“Did you watch any of the late-night TV shows? Gas Station Sam was on almost every one of them.”
“Nope,” Annie lied. “I went to bed early.”
“Alone?” Bridget persisted.
“That’s none of your business.”
“That means you were alone.”
“Okay,” Annie admitted, “so maybe I watched some late-night TV.”
Bridget smiled sympathetically. “There’s no harm in dreaming, Annie.”
“There is if it interferes with your reality.” She sighed. “So what if I find this guy intriguing? From what I gather, so does the rest of America.”
“True, but there’s no reason you should settle for Mr. Tall Dark and Boring when there are men like Sam in the world.”
Annie chewed that over. Maybe she should tell Bridget about her plan to break up with Walter. She’d find out sooner or later anyway, and Bridget seemed to know a lot about men. Maybe she could give Annie some tips on how to break things off gently. “Walter is making partner at his law firm,” she began.
Bridget faked a yawn. “That’s nice.”
“It means he’s going to have to buy into the firm, which means financially this isn’t the best time to get engaged.”
“Does Walter have any idea when it might be a good time?”
“In about two years.”
“A person could fall in love, get married, and have a baby in half that time.”
“Meaning?”
“Meaning, you don’t owe Walter anything. Not if he chooses to put his career over you.”
“I agree.”
Bridget nearly fell off the desk. “Did I just hear right?”
Annie swallowed hard. “I’m going to break up with Walter.”
“It’s about time! What brought this on?”
She handed Bridget the letter. “I took your advice and wrote to Gas Station Sam.”
Bridget pumped her fist in the air. “Yes!”
“But I’m not going to mail it. I only wrote it to clear my thoughts. Which it did. So I guess I have him to thank for that. And you. Only don’t get a big head about it.”
Bridget quickly perused the letter. “Mmm … definitely not what I would have written, but you never know. He might find it interesting.”
“That’s something we’ll never find out since he’s never going to read it, because I’m never going to mail it.”
“But—”
“But nothing. For one thing, I have no idea where to send it. Like I said, I only wrote it to help give me clarity. Which it did.”
Bridget pursed her lips.
“Don’t get all pouty on me. I would think you’d be happy that I’ve come to a decision about Walter.”
“I’m happy that you’ve decided to get on with your life. He wasn’t the guy for you, Annie.”
“I agree. Which is why I was hoping you could give me some pointers on how to break up with him.”
“Let me guess.” Bridget gave her a wonky look. “You’ve never broken up with anyone before.”
“Nope.”
“Not even in high school?”
Annie shook her head.
“Middle school?” Bridget persisted.
“Who has a boyfriend in middle school?”
Bridget looked up at the ceiling like she was trying to channel some divine intervention. “Never mind. You’re right. You do need help. You could always ghost him, but I don’t think Walter would notice.”
“Not funny.” Except Bridget might have a point. Walter was always so busy at work, it might take weeks before he noticed that she’d stopped texting him. No, not weeks. Tuesday would roll around and he’d want to know why she wasn’t waiting for him in their usual booth at the diner.
“Okay, so you want to do it publicly,” said Bridget, “like in a restaurant. That way he can’t make a scene. Not that I think Walter will make a scene. He’d never do anything to risk his professional reputation.”
“You think I should break up with him over dinner? Doesn’t that seem a little harsh?”
“Rejection is a dish best served cold.”
“I thought that was revenge,” said Annie.
“Same thing. Breaking up with him is both rejection and revenge. He’s made it clear that you aren’t number one in his life. For instance, when is the last time you and Walter had sex?”
Annie stiffened. “I’m not going to answer that.”
Bridget stared at her until Annie felt her cheeks go hot. Man, Bridget was good. “Okay, so it’s been a while.”
“I don’t even want to know what your idea of a while is. So this man who puts his job ahead of you and your needs really doesn’t deserve much in the way of a breakup. I say you tell him right before dessert. And make sure he pays the bill.”