“Lulu, I saw her. I’m the one who found her,” Kate said. “She was broken, Lu. Her head was cracked. Her neck . . .”
“Oh, Kate,” Lulu said, holding her tighter.
“My little sister,” Kate said. “Her beautiful eyes were so cloudy, staring into nothing. The last thing she saw was someone killing her.”
“This is what I was so scared of,” Lulu whispered, stroking her hair. “Not being able to face what I know you’ve been through. Why did you have to find her? Of everyone, why did it have to be you? I don’t want it in your mind, that sight of her. I want you to remember her alive and happy, our girl . . .”
“I’m so glad it was me,” Kate said. “It was as if . . . I was taking care of her, for the last time. Being with her. Not turning away. I had to see her, Lulu. It would have been ten times worse if I hadn’t. She was so alone at the end. And she lay there all that time, by herself in that cold room, and no one knew. I had to be the one to find her.”
“I should have been here,” Lulu said.
Kate pushed herself away to dry her tears. She nodded. “Yeah, you should have. I know what you said, but I still don’t get why you weren’t. Not really.” She waited for Lulu to reply, but Lulu just stared down at her feet, shaking her head.
Kate’s gaze fell upon Lulu’s leg, crisscrossed with thin bloody lines.
“What happened?” Kate asked.
“I had an incident at Little Beach. Barnacles.” Lulu paused. “Have you been through the path lately?”
“No,” Kate said.
“Kids sprayed paint all over the rocks,” Lulu said, the awkward non sequitur hovering between them.
Kate closed her eyes. The last time she’d been there was with Beth. This past June they had walked to Little Beach, along the water’s edge at dusk, looking for moonstones. The pebbles had glistened in the wet sand, opalescent in late-day amber light, lighting their path like tiny fallen moons.
“Are you okay?” Lulu asked, watching Kate, bringing her back to the present.
“I’m kicking Pete and Nicola out today. The locksmith is coming.”
“Can you imagine what Mathilda would say if she knew Pete was here? After what he’s put Beth and Sam through?” Lulu asked.
“She’d be apoplectic. Beth should have made them leave the minute she found out they were here.”
Lulu looked away, seeming to think about it. “Maybe she had other things on her mind.”
Of course Beth had had plenty on her mind, but the way Lulu said it made Kate feel uneasy. “What do you mean?” she asked.
Lulu didn’t reply.
“Well, my theory is it made her feel strong,” Kate said. “Like she had the power. Knowing she could get rid of them at any time.”
“She had a lot going on,” Lulu said.
“Yes, the pregnancy, running the gallery . . .”
“Et cetera,” Lulu said.
Kate gave her a sharp glance. “Et cetera? Is there something you want to tell me?”
“No. I’m just upset. Who’s going to run the gallery now?” Lulu asked.
“Maybe I’ll have to.”
“What about your job? Uh, you’re a pilot.”
“I know. Maybe I can do both.”
Lulu gave her a skeptical look. “They’re both kind of full time, aren’t they?”
“I’m not ready to think about this,” Kate said.
“You can hire someone to run the gallery. As long as you don’t sell it. You have to keep it in the family. I still think of it as Mathilda’s.”
It touched Kate how loyal Lulu was to Mathilda. Mathilda had influenced both of them to become pilots. Lulu had gone up with Kate and Mathilda many times. But Lulu was right: the gallery had always been and would always be Mathilda’s. It bore the stamp of her style and personality, a home for the art of the Black Hall Colony.
“Beth was planning an exhibit around Hassam’s World War I flag paintings. It would have been an homage to Mathilda. She really loved that series.”
“Well, she was a veteran, a patriot.”
“She always told us that Hassam had wanted to volunteer to go to Europe and record the war. I think she wished a Black Hall artist had done that for her war.”
Her war. World War II, when she’d learned to fly. As Kate and Lulu headed across the lawn to meet the locksmith, Kate thought of the Harkness-Woodward women, how they had been shaped by their grandmother’s bravery. She’d withstood bullets and bombs and being demeaned by men in power. There must have been times when she had been so afraid, but she’d never talked about it to Kate. Maybe she had to Ruth. Kate thought about how even the strongest women could feel fear. The idea of Beth’s last hour filled her mind.
“She must have been terrified,” Kate said.
“Mathilda?”
Kate shook her head. “Beth. At the end, when he was strangling her, knowing that she was going to die. That she’d lose the baby. And whatever led up to that moment when . . .” She couldn’t finish the sentence. “Do you think about it?”
“Of course,” Lulu said, staring into space. “All the time.” Her mouth and jaw were tense, set, as if holding back words.
“What is it?” Kate asked.
“Look, there’s the locksmith,” Lulu said.
Their feet crunched over white gravel and crushed clamshells as they approached the maroon van. It was painted with a gold lock and key. The locksmith was young and lanky, with a long dark ponytail covered by a red bandana. Kate showed him the doors with locks she wanted changed. Seven altogether, all around the first floor of the big house. When he was done, he wanted payment in cash. Kate had gone to the ATM and was prepared.
She and Lulu went into the kitchen and grabbed big black plastic garbage bags. Going through the bedrooms, they filled them with Pete’s and Nicola’s things. Kate stared at Tyler’s toys and clothes and couldn’t bring herself to touch them.
They piled the trash bags next to the driveway. Kate made Earl Grey tea, and out of a sense of reclaiming Mathilda’s house, served it in Limoges cups she had loved as a child—the translucent white porcelain delicately painted with butterflies, tiny roses, forget-me-nots, and ladybugs. She tucked the large manila envelope under her arm and carried the tray out the side door.
They sat on the side porch, the ceiling painted the palest shade of sky blue. The Compass Rose had had many tea parties in this exact spot. Mathilda had taught them to brew loose Darjeeling the way she had learned in England, when she had been stationed north of London during the war. Once the leaves had steeped enough, Kate poured the tea, and Lulu added extra sugar to hers.
“I want to show you something,” Kate said after they’d finished the first cup.
Lulu watched her reach into the envelope and pause. Kate felt torn—Lulu was her best friend and had loved Beth as much as anyone. But revealing her sister’s secret felt like a betrayal.
“What is it?” Lulu asked.
“I found these hidden in Beth’s desk,” Kate said. “She obviously didn’t intend for anyone to see them. I wouldn’t show them to anyone, even you, but I need help, to figure out what they mean.”