Kate turned the ring to see the other markings. The hearts were Beth’s, Jed had said. Under each were three dots.
“Ellipses? To be continued?” she asked.
“No. Those are drops of blood.”
Kate’s pulse quickened. She pictured the scrawled hearts on the back of the canvas and on the last page of Vasari’s The Lives of the Artists, the book at Mathilda’s house.
“Blood hearts,” she said.
“Yes,” he said, sounding surprised. “That’s what she called them.”
“Did you ever see Moonlight? The painting?”
“She told me about it. How it was stolen during that time, when they tied you up and your mother died.”
“You never saw the back of it, the unpainted side? What was drawn there?”
“No,” he said. “She never even showed me the canvas. Why are you asking about the back?”
“No reason,” Kate said, still staring at the hearts on the ring. “I was just wondering.” Then, “Where did she keep her ring?”
Jed reached into his pocket, pulled it out, placed it on the table.
It was beautiful, smaller than Jed’s. Beth had worn it. Kate picked it up. She closed her eyes and felt her sister’s passion. She turned it over and over in her hand, but Jed reached over and took it from her before she could slip it onto her own finger.
45
The first Saturday after school started, Kate went to the hardware store and bought an eco-friendly gel that wouldn’t leech into the sea. She filled a bag with safety goggles and gloves. She and Sam met Lulu, Scotty, and Isabel at Little Beach, and they scrubbed the boulders, removing the graffitied paint from the granite and quartz. After a while, Lulu, Scotty, and Kate left Sam and Isabel to finish the job and sat on a beach blanket to supervise. Julie walked the tide line, looking for sea glass.
September skies were bluer than August, the sea cleaner, less churned up by boat traffic. A good breeze blew the tops off low waves, sent beach grass skittering and tracing circles on the hard sand. Kate had always loved this time of year, when vacations were over and she and her friends had the beach to themselves. Even over here, this hidden, private place felt more isolated. People weren’t likely to come through the path.
Kate walked down to the water’s edge, picked up a piece of tide-scoured driftwood. Bleached silver by salt and sun, bark scraped off, it was a foot long, the thin, sharp tip of a broken branch. When she returned to the blanket, Scotty was on the phone with Nick, and Lulu was lying on her back, face to the sun.
Waiting for Scotty to finish her call, Kate looked at her right index finger. For nearly a year after that day in Mathilda’s library, when they were teenagers, there had been a fine scar on the pad, from where she had pricked it, coaxed blood to bubble out. The mark had long since disappeared. When Scotty hung up, she shaded her eyes to look at Kate. So did Lulu.
After smoothing a patch of sand beside the beach blanket, Kate used the branch to write the letters K, B, L, S. She encircled them with a heart.
“Do you remember?” she asked.
“Blood sisters,” Lulu said. “We wrote in the book.”
“A long time ago,” Scotty said.
“Time wasn’t supposed to matter,” Kate said.
“And it didn’t,” Lulu said, holding out her hand, grabbing Kate’s. “Not to me.”
“Feeling sentimental?” Scotty asked.
“More like confused,” Kate said.
“About what?” Lulu asked.
“My sister’s secrets,” Kate said.
“Which we helped her to keep,” Lulu said.
“Are you blaming us?” Scotty asked.
“We promised never to keep secrets from each other,” Kate said.
“Beth and I were fourteen,” Scotty said. “You two were fifteen. We didn’t even know, really, what secrets meant. Look at them.” She nodded toward Sam and Isabel. “They think they’re so grown up, but they’re babies.”
“I think we knew exactly what secrets were,” Kate said slowly, “when we were young. How powerful they are, how they can hurt. I think we’ve forgotten as we’ve grown up. At least Beth and I did. She was my sister, and I had no idea about her real life.”
“Jed?” Lulu asked.
Kate nodded. “She was leaving Pete for him. She wanted to marry him. I didn’t even know he existed.”
“Kate,” Scotty said. “I don’t mean this in any sort of cruel way . . .”
“Nice way to start your thought,” Lulu said dryly.
“Take it as you will. But Beth was in love. Head over heels, madly in love. Feeling that way lends itself to secrets—makes it more delicious, maybe. However, it was never all one thing. There were some issues . . . she couldn’t make up her mind about. And, Kate, she was being sensitive to you.”
“How?” Kate asked.
“Well, love isn’t your thing. That kind of love, anyway.”
“Scotty, is that vodka in your water bottle?” Lulu asked.
“She’s right,” Kate said.
“You loved Beth, you love Sam, you love us,” Lulu said.
“That’s not the same as in love,” Scotty said.
“Will you please shut up?” Lulu asked.
“I meant it in a good way, truly,” Scotty said. “When you think of the fucking nightmare it can be, finding the right person, and even afterward—all Nick seems to do these days is run and train. He’s clearly trying to escape something; I only hope it isn’t me—ha. I really am sorry if it came out wrong, Katy.”
“It’s okay,” Kate said, giving her friends a big smile, reassuring them that she was fine, not offended. “But, Scotty, what couldn’t she make up her mind about?”
Scotty frowned for a second before speaking. “Well, um,” she began.
Kate had a sudden, shocking feeling she was trying to get her story straight. “Just tell me. Don’t be afraid of hurting my feelings.”
“Okay. It was just the pregnancy. You can’t even imagine what it’s like if you haven’t been . . . Sorry, but it’s like, expectant-mom brain. Hard to make decisions.”
“Like whether to stay with Pete?” Lulu asked.
“Like that,” Scotty said.
“What did she say about it?” Kate asked.
“She was under a lot of pressure,” Scotty said. “She felt she had to make everyone happy.”
That’s what Jed said, Kate thought.
“To the point it completely messed with her moral compass,” Scotty continued.
“Her moral compass?” Lulu asked with complete incredulity in her voice. “She was an amazing, complicated woman.”
“Yes, she was,” Scotty said. “She taught me so much. Even at the soup kitchen. She didn’t just serve the meals. She sat down with everyone, wanted to hear about their lives. She was interested. And I’ve gotten that way too. I don’t just go there so I can be all church lady and say, ‘Oh, I’m such a good person.’ I look forward to it. Getting to know new friends. People who got in trouble but are trying to turn their lives around.”
“I had no idea you were so involved,” Kate said.