Closing my eyes, I shake my head. I can’t think of that day. Every time I do it guts me. I open my eyes and glance down at the tattoo I now sport on my hand. ‘Inner Strength’. I’m strong for her and here soon she’ll need me more than ever though as her world gets knocked off its axis all over again.
Chapter Eighteen
Harley
I don’t know what’s going on but after Neo reclaimed me from Venom, I could sense something was up. I wanted to ask him but at the same time I’d been afraid of what I’d find out.
For the past two weeks things seemed to settle somewhat around the clubhouse. Guys who’d come up from the Franklin Charter went back home. Well, all but Badger, the guy who looked familiar. He stayed around and his ol’ lady, Jordan, came up with their little boy Nico.
Something’s up.
Plus, the girls though they spoke to me, they all stayed at a distance. Especially Luna. I know she’s upset with how I cut her out of my life but I couldn’t help it. I’d been in a bad place at the time and I was not able to handle things.
Each day I can feel myself growing stronger. I’m not nervous to walk into the main room of the clubhouse anymore. I’ve spent time with Venom and a little bit with Shadow as he checked in on me, mainly to see where my head’s at. I’m sure he’s wanting to get things between Luna and myself patched up and I do too, it’s just I’m apprehensive.
Maybe she’s right and I do feel a part of what’s happened to me is her fault. Then again, my life was screwed up way before I met Luna.
The other day Neo took me to my house or might I say our house, as he confessed when we got there, he’d bought it to keep me from losing my home. I officially met my neighbors and found out they were Neo’s aunt and uncle. I had them to thank for Neo saving me. If they hadn’t been concerned, I definitely would have managed to end my life that day.
I still struggle and I think I always will have to fight the need to want to slice into my skin. I know some of the members of the club watch me carefully to make sure I don’t do anything to myself; however, I understand why so it’s not bothering me.
Yesterday, I finally got back on my computer and started working again on edits. I’m thankful to whoever contacted my clients, they’d informed them I’d been in an accident and would be unreachable for a little while. Which is mostly true, I’d been unable to speak to anyone or work.
I found I really like working in the kitchen close to the coffee maker where I can refill my cup whenever need be. Harlow also likes to work in there as well and I found she makes even better food than just her cookies. She makes an awesome gumbo.
With my laptop in hand, I head in that direction to get some work done while Neo is working out in the gym. Tonight, I’m going out with him to watch him fight in one of his matches. I’m looking forward to it and can’t wait to see Neo kick butt.
“I want to know what the hell’s going on.” At the sound of Victoria’s voice snapping, I stop right outside the kitchen door.
“I agree. I don’t think it’s fair everyone’s supposed to be walking on eggshells around her. She’s supposed to be my best friend I don’t even know what’s turned her into who she is now. Harley didn’t used to be this scared. Even Shadow is babying her and I’m confused by all of this. He didn’t even do that when he first met me,” Luna mutters.
Tears sting my eyes as I continue to listen to them talk about me and how I cry so easily. I know I’m not like them and they’re strong and beautiful were I’m weak and bland.
Turning on my heel with my head down, I head back in the direction I’d come from. The urge growing so much more with each step.
I only hope I’m at least strong enough to fight against it.
Jordan
There are days I understand people around me and then there are days I don’t get the way someone can hurt those around them without thinking.
I know she didn’t see me but I saw her as well as heard what she did. I understand her pain. This girl is supposed to be my sister-in-law and knowing what all the women at Badger’s club have gone through, I’m thinking it’s time for something to happen here. I’d spoken with Rachel and Raven when I first got here. They are the only two who know and knew Badger told me. I’d kept my distance from Harley out of respect for Badger, he wanted to wait for his father to get here before approaching his sister.
Standing up, I leave the main room in search of Rachel, and find her in Stoney’s office playing on the floor with Sebastian, while her ol’ man worked at his desk. There littlest one was asleep on a mat next to her.
“I’m sorry to interrupt but I need to speak to you, I suppose both of you,” I say, glancing between the two of them.
“What’s up, Jordan?” Rachel asks.
“I want your permission to bring all the ol’ ladies up from Badger’s club,” I state, holding her gaze.
“There a reason for this?” Stoney’s voice booms through the enclosed space of his office.
“Yes, something needs to be done about an issue I just overheard, and I think an intervention is in order. She might not know it but I heard exactly what she did and I’m pissed. I know everyone goes through things differently, it doesn’t give them an excuse for bullying and saying hurtful things all because they didn’t get their way and find out what happen to Harley. She’s been through hell. I can only imagine what she dealt with growing up having to deal with the grandfather who brought up a demon of a child, who would hurt her child and give another one up, telling those children’s father the child died in birth. I mean who does that shit,” I rant.
“Call them,” Rachel says immediately without hesitation.
“I’m calling Twister informing him of this. He’ll make sure they all get up here.” Stoney nods.
“Thank you,” I murmur in gratitude.
“It’s nothing to thank us for, Jordan. I’m sorry and you’re right we all go through things in different ways. I’m finally overcoming my own demons as I grow even closer to Stoney. I don’t know what I’d do without him, I do suggest we ask Badger and Neo to come in and tell them what’s happened,” Rachel suggests.
“Don’t worry about it, Doll. I’m shooting all the men a text telling them we’re having church. You staying in here, or you gonna go hangout in the other room?” The love and adoration Stoney has for Rachel is beautiful to me.
“I think if Jordan’s cool with it, I’ll take the boys out in the main room, check on Luca and Corinne, and hang with Jordan for a while. How about we order pizzas tonight?”
“I’m alright with hanging out with you. I won’t be responsible for my actions if I have to speak with the others right now. I’m livid with them,” I say with a small smile.
“Sounds good, order pizza and when we get out of church, I’ll help you take the kids home and put them in bed,” Stoney grumbles, standing from behind his desk.
Satisfied, I leave them to it and pull out my phone. I pull up Izzy’s number and hit send.