“And you’ll make plenty of dough from these interviews too. Don’t worry about that.”
“I wasn’t exactly worried about that part.”
She snickers loudly. “Well, aren’t you lucky then? Because for lots of people, that would be their first concern. Making a little extra money on the side just for the sake of getting their bills paid.”
She has a way about her, Lois does. She’s good at making me cringe.
“You’re right, of course. I’m just really nervous about being on camera, and I would rather avoid it. I’m not trying to sound ungrateful, trust me.”
“Everybody’s nervous about being on camera the first time. I had a client back in the ’90s who threw up in a bucket between his feet not ten seconds before the show went live, and he ended up knocking it out of the park.”
“Ooh, who was it?”
“That’s not important—though you’d know the name if you heard it. My point is, you’ll do just fine. I’ll make sure to have a list of questions in front of me before the interview, so you can be prepared.”
I can breathe a little easier now. “Okay. That sounds pretty good actually.”
“Does that mean you feel better about this?” There’s a motherly tone in her voice that makes me smile even though I can’t help feeling like she’s patronizing me just a little.
“Yes, Lois.”
“Very nice. Now, I have to make a few phone calls on your behalf. You’ve certainly been making me earn my money lately.”
Rather than remind her of how easy I’ve made her job over the years and how she’s finally earning her keep, I thank her for her help and end the call. She’s great, and she got me my first deal with the publisher, so I can’t undervalue her contributions, but still, there have been times over the past year when I’ve wondered why she’s even around.
Whatever. I need to answer these questions and get back to my writing. I swear, with Matt as my muse, the writing is going very well.
The first few are beyond easy.
What made me want to become a writer?
I type out a response to that, explaining how I always loved to read and to write and how disappointment in my own love life led me to create my dream man in my first book.
Boy, I was young and naive then. Fresh-faced, hopeful, bright, and shiny.
How did I score a book deal so easily?
This one I’ll leave entirely up to the skill of my agent. Sure, I had to reach out and query her in the first place, but she was the one who did the work to find Maggie. I can’t take credit for that.
By early afternoon, I’m halfway through my immediate, off-the-cuff responses and wondering if I should go back now to edit, to smooth things out a little, when my phone rings.
Seeing Hayley’s name makes my heart leap into my throat.
“What’s wrong?” I blurt out the second the phone is against my ear.
She never calls me at this time of day.
The first thing I hear is sniffling, which ratchets my anxiety up another million degrees.
“They’re sending him back sooner than planned.”
I close my eyes. “Sweetie.”
“He wasn’t supposed to go back until after the holidays, but apparently, they need him for something out there. It’s so stupid.” Her voice has a strange, echoing quality, so I imagine she’s calling from the ladies’ room at work.
“That is so wrong! I mean, your relationship aside, how can they expect somebody to just go at a moment’s notice?”
“I don’t know, but he has to be back in the office on Monday morning.”
“I know you have vacation time saved up. Other than the wedding, you haven’t taken any. Maybe you can go out there with him.”
“Yeah, but then there’s family stuff. My brother, Brandon, is going to the trouble of coming back from his research trip, and I don’t want to miss seeing him. Plus, I know that would just cause a huge blowup with the family. I don’t feel like having to go through that.”
I’ve seen her family in action. I can only imagine the way they’d react if they found out she was skipping out on family holiday time to be with her boyfriend. Not that they would begrudge her the time spent with him, but they would definitely lay a big guilt trip on her.
“Sometimes, we have to make these uncomfortable decisions. Somebody’s bound to be disappointed, no matter what we decide.”
“Why can’t this just be easy? Why am I not allowed to be happy?”
I’ve never heard her talk this way before. “Nobody says you’re not allowed to be happy. You deserve it more than just about anybody I know.”
“Then, why is this happening? God, Kitty, I’m so tired.” She sounds like it too. Like she’s about a few moments away from giving up.
“Sweetie, what else is going on? Is there something you’re not telling me?”
Another few sniffles. “I think I’m burned out. I think that’s the problem. I’ve been working eighteen-hour days nearly seven days a week for how long now?”
“That’s true.”
“What for? I’m waiting for somebody to tell me whether I’m allowed to follow the man I really, really care about across the country. Like, he could be the one. I’ve never said that about anybody before.”
“I know. That’s pretty huge.”
“But here I am, dancing on their string. It’s like it doesn’t matter how much work I put into my job or how good I am at it. All they want to do is wring every last bit of energy out of me. I look at you, and I see the freedom you have …”
I have to bite my tongue since I know she’s not in any mood to be contradicted, but I don’t exactly have a ton of freedom. If I did, I would tell Maggie and Lois and whoever else was involved that they could take this interview thing and shove it.
“I just don’t know what to do.” She sounds so forlorn, so heartbroken, that it brings tears to my eyes. “And if all that isn’t bad enough, I just found out that I’m pregnant.”
“What? Oh my God. That’s amazing!”
“No, it’s not. I’m not married.”
“Who cares? It doesn’t have to be that way anymore.”
“My family is going to freak!” she counters.
“They might be surprised, but your mom is going to be so incredibly happy! Plus, you love him. You’re in love. It’s a love child. So romantic.”
“Until I’m stuck alone with the baby, jobless, because I followed him to California, only for him to break up with me.”
“Are you excited about the baby?”
“Of course I am. I’ve always wanted children. And Nicholas wants them too. But I’m not thrilled about the timing, and I don’t know how he’s going to react. Really, how much more can our relationship take?”
“I wish I were there, so I could give you a hug.”
“Just talking helps.” She sniffles and then seems to pull herself back together. “I’ll figure it out. I always do. Oh, and my sister, Kylie, wants to throw a good-bye party for Nicholas on Saturday night. She and Zack finally moved into their new place uptown. And since Nicholas probably won’t be here for the holidays, it’s holiday-themed. Will you come?”