After another round of goodbyes, we’re out the door. Kacen walks me to the passenger side and opens the door. “I’ll drive. You’ve had a long day.” He waits for me to climb in, then leans in and kisses me softly before shutting the door. As soon as we are on the road, he reaches over and rests his hand on my leg. I run my fingers up his arm; his corded muscles twitch under my touch.
Excitement bubbles inside as I realize that I finally, after all these months, get to sleep in his arms. Not because he’s consoling me as my tears wet his shirt, not because we fell asleep watching TV, but because he loves me.
Living life to its fullest.
Chapter 43
Kacen
As much as I want to sink inside of her, feel her from the inside again, I won’t. She’s had a rough couple of days and my need to take care of her outweighs the desire to ravish her. As we enter the hotel room, I drop the keys on the dresser and head straight for the bathroom. Stacy reserved us luxury suites. I make a mental note to thank her. Turning on the hot water, I start running a bath for Logan. She can soak for a little while and relax. I’ll then spend the night with her in my arms.
Shit! I know I sound like a whipped fuck, but, honestly, I have no control over it when it comes to her. She’s number one, and being near her is essential to me.
After I get the water temperature just right, I call out for her. She appears at the bathroom door with a puzzled expression on her face. I pull her into my arms. “Let me take care of you.” Stepping back, I slowly lift her arms over her head. Gripping the bottom of her shirt, I lift it up and over her head, tossing it on the floor.
She’s gorgeous and I should have left her alone to get undressed. I’m torturing myself, but it’s a sweet torture, one that I will gladly accept.
She licks her lips and I run my thumb across them. I slowly trace her cheek, allowing my index finger to trail down her neck. I continue over the swell of her breasts and across her tight, toned stomach. I don’t want to rush this, undressing her. I want to catalogue every second for a later time. I’ve dreamed of the time that I would get to see her again like this, to touch her soft skin.
Focus, Kacen!
My hands reach the waistband of her blue jean shorts and I make quick work of the button. I pull her into a kiss as I slide the zipper down and guide her shorts over her hips, letting them fall to the floor.
I continue to slowly tangle my tongue with hers, savoring her. Without breaking the kiss, my hands travel to her back and unsnap her bra. I leisurely pull it from her shoulders and toss it over my shoulder. I guide my hands down her sides, stopping to run the pad of my thumbs over her now hard nipples. She moans deep in her throat.
I keep going. Eventually, my hands arrive on her hips, and I have to break our kiss. I kneel before her and slide her barely-there panties down her legs. Not able to resist, I place a wet kiss just below her belly button. Her hands fly to my hair and she tugs me to her. I let her pull me close, but I don’t make another move. I need to stop now, or else my idea of taking care of her tonight, emotionally, will be out the fucking window. She’s so responsive and I’ve longed for her every day for months.
I have to use every bit of willpower I have to stop from devouring her. Instead, I look up at her. “Time for a bath.” I motion my head toward the tub.
“You ran me a bath?” There is awe in her voice, like she’s surprised I would do that for her.
That ex of hers couldn’t have shown her an ounce of care or love. Never again will she ever feel like she’s nothing but the most important person in my world.
“Yes, a bath. It’s been a rough couple of days and you deserve to relax.”
She chews on her bottom lip as her gaze stays locked on the tub. I place my index finger under her chin and guide her to look at me. “What’s wrong?”
She shakes her head. “Nothing, I just . . . will you get in with me?” she asks. Her voice is soft and hesitant.
“Anything you want, baby.” I quickly strip out of my clothes and turn the overhead light off in the bathroom. This leaves just a small nightlight over the sink giving off a soft glow. Reaching over, I turn off the water and guide myself into its warmth. Taking her hand, I hold tight as she steps in one foot at a time. Slowly, she sits down in front of me, and I waste no time grabbing her hips and pulling her close, aligning her wet, slick body with mine.
Heaven.
“This is nice,” she says.
“Hmmm,” I agree. Nice isn’t really strong enough to explain how this feels, having her this close to me again with nothing between us. This time, she’s mine, and we both know it.
“Say something,” she tells me.
I kiss her temple. “What do you want me to say?”
“Anything, I just like hearing your voice.”
She fucking owns me.
It’s just me and my girl. No one is here to witness me serving my balls to her on a silver platter, not that I would care. I will never hesitate to let anyone and everyone know who she is and how important she is to me. Man card be damned.
“I was angry the morning after in Hawaii. I woke up reaching for you, and I was angry that you were gone.” I’ve never talked to her about this, not really. “I went for a walk on the beach and ended up peering through the window of your rental. I was desperate to see you again.” I cup water in my hands and cover her breasts.
“Even then, I knew there was something different between us, a connection I’d never felt. I tried telling myself it was just because I wanted you again, wanted more of you but it was more than that.”
“I was scared,” she admits. “I thought I was going crazy thinking there was that strong of a connection with a guy I’d known a week. It was a first for me, and my emotions were all over the place.”
“I left early. I called Cassidy and had her take care of it. I couldn’t be there without you. The memory of our night haunted me. I needed to come home.” I wrap my arms around her waist. “Then, when I walk through the door, I’m told that my new assistant, who was supposed to be male, is actually female. I was pissed until I walked into that room and laid eyes on you.”
“I was already scared you were going to fire me, and then when I saw you, I was sure I was losing my job.”
“I had to keep myself from rushing you, throwing you over my shoulder, and carrying you off to my room. No way was I letting you go. I had to play the game. I couldn’t let you see how you affected me. Not after you left in the middle of the night.”
“I wanted to stay,” she says softy as she stands. My eyes are glued to her gorgeous wet body as she slowly settles into my lap. I scoot forward, allowing her room to wrap her legs around me. “I need to see you for this part,” she whispers.
Her hands roam over my chest. She leans down and kisses my neck. I grip her hips and fight like hell to not slip inside of her. I’m not covered, and I have no idea how she feels about going bare. I couldn’t give a fuck less about the risks of pregnancy, but again, I have no idea how she feels. My fucking heart skips a beat at the thought of part of me growing inside of her.
Her chocolate eyes sparkle in the dim light as they lock on mine. “You’ve shown me what it feels like to be the center of your world. You’ve shown me what it feels like to feel safe and confident in a relationship. I know we’ve not really been official, but you never wavered on how you treated me or how you felt about me. When you said I love you yesterday, I wanted to tell you then. I’m not sorry though. I’m glad it worked out the way that it did. I needed to come to terms with things on my own, and now you’re here.”