Zorak akai, he probably hadn’t known what contemplation even meant until recently.
He wasn’t sure yet if that was a good thing or a bad thing.
Broxen unlatched the deadbolt, grasped the knob, and opened the front door. His brow furrowed in confusion as he stared out into empty evening air. The street was dark but for the exterior lights of the houses along it, and the only sound was from the wind rustling the nearby trees. His confusion vanished when he lowered his gaze.
Ana stood before him, smiling broadly, wearing the same, strange animal clothing he’d seen her in earlier with the horned hood on her head and her pant legs tucked into a pair of pink snow boots. In front of her, she held a round plate topped with various shapes colored red, green, white, and blue.
“Hi, Mr. Lee!” She lifted the plate. “My mom told me to bring you some of the Christmas cookies we made.”
“Oh.” He reached down and accepted the plate on one hand, tilting his head as he studied the cookies. He realized the shapes were familiar—a sock, a pine tree, a cane.
No, a candy cane.
Those treats had become quite commonplace in the stores lately. They must’ve had something to do with the upcoming holiday.
Ana stepped closer, rose on her tip toes, and pointed to the large bear in the center of the plate. “I made that one special for you. It’s my best one.”
The corner of Broxen’s mouth quirked up. The bear-shaped cookie was decorated in white icing with blue eyes of two different sizes, a crooked smile, and what must’ve been a red scarf around its neck. It was the strangest bear he’d ever seen, but it was charming…and no one had ever made anything like this, just for him.
“Thank you,” he said, meeting Ana’s gaze. “I like bears. And this one is the best.”
If possible, her smile only grew wider.
“So, are you going to be Mom’s boyfriend?” she asked.
Damn, this kit was right to the point.
Yet he couldn’t deny a rumbling of irritation. He knew how that word, boyfriend, was commonly used, and he understood what it meant to humans, but he didn’t care for it. Nothing about him was boyish; he was a full-grown, powerful male who would do all he could to protect his female. And he longed to be far more than friends with Gabriela. Mate was the more fitting word. The right word.
Broxen grunted and shrugged with one shoulder. “Hopefully.”
She turned her head to the side slightly and narrowed her eyes. “You won’t hurt her, right?”
“Never.”
Ana nodded. “My dad hurt her, but he’s not really my dad. He left when I was in Mom’s belly. He didn’t want us.”
Broxen frowned, eyebrows falling low. “You’re better off without that kind of male in your life. You and your mother are the best. Even better than this bear cookie.”
She smiled again. “That is the best cookie, and she is the best mom.” Dipping her head, she slid a foot forward, grinding the toe of her boot on the ground. “And…I think you’d make a good dad. Cause you’re nice, and you helped fixed my bike. And dads do that stuff, right, Mr. Lee?”
“I…”
Ana’s words hit him harder than he could ever have guessed they would. The trust in her expression, the rawness of what she’d said, the hopefulness behind it… How could he ever respond to all that? He didn’t know what it meant to be a father, and he definitely didn’t know how to be a good one. He didn’t even know where things would go between himself and Gabriela from this point.
But he knew what he wanted. He wanted Gabriela in his life. He wanted Ana in his life. And he couldn’t deny, as foolish as it might have been, that he was as hopeful for that as Ana.
Keeping the plate of cookies balanced on his palm, he sank into a crouch, putting him closer to Ana’s eye level. “Whatever happens, Ana, I’m going to look out for you and your mom. I promise I’ll keep you both safe.”
Those big brown eyes, so much like her mother’s, met his. “Truly?”
Broxen nodded. “Truly. And any time your bike breaks, just come to me. I’ll help.”
“Thank you, Mr. Lee.”
“Call me Brox—” He snapped his mouth shut, cutting himself off before he could stupidly utter that name. “Mason. Not Mr. Lee, okay?”
Ana beamed at him. “Okay.”
“It’s late. You should get home, and I have cookies to eat. Thank your mom for me.”
“I will.”
She stepped back, hesitated for a moment, then ran forward, throwing her arms around his neck and squeezing him. The embrace was over before Broxen could register what she had done, leaving him to stare after her in stunned silence as she ran toward her house.
As she reached the end of his walkway, Ana turned and waved. “Good night, Mason. See you tomorrow!”
Broxen lifted his hand and waved back. He stood upright and watched as she raced across the road and back to her home, his heart thumping a little louder, a little faster, as she reached her front door. He held his breath, hoping for a glimpse of Gabriela when Ana threw the door open and darted inside.
“Mom, Mom,” Ana shouted, and then the door slammed shut behind her.
Blowing out the breath he’d been holding, Broxen stepped back and closed his own door, though he did so softly. He couldn’t ignore the ridiculousness of this situation—that he was so crushed, so disappointed, to have missed out on seeing Gabriela for what wouldn’t have been more than a second or two.
Zorak akai, those romance books and romantic comedy movies were beginning to make sense. This was what the humans called falling hard.
But he wondered if that was the right term as he carried the plate of cookies to the table and placed it down in the same spot his microwaved dinner had occupied minutes before. Falls usually came with pain, with a jolt. What he felt now…well, it seemed more like floating than falling. Or maybe it was like falling—like falling forever, with no ground in sight.
Broxen sat down, propped his arms on the table, and stared down at the cookies. The little white bear stared back up at him unblinkingly, its smile never fading.
The cookie bear wasn’t judging Broxen. It didn’t know about his past, it didn’t know his true form, and it didn’t care. Neither did Ana. Somehow, she’d looked at Broxen and had seen a good man. A potential parent, a potential father. She hadn’t seen a former street thug, an enforcer, a bodyguard who’d protected some dangerous people—and had failed to protect the one person he’d known who might’ve done some good.
And that quick hug she’d given him before running off…
That little girl had placed her trust in him. She’d placed her hope in him. That had to mean something, didn’t it? That had to mean that maybe, just maybe, Astius had been right—that Broxen could be more than his past. That he could choose a different path and succeed.
Maybe it meant that Gabriela had seen something like that in him, too.
He shifted a hand, reaching toward the bear cookie, but stopped himself. Something about it gave him pause.
Saving the best for last.
That was a human thing, wasn’t it? There was no harm in it. How often was he gifted homemade bear cookies, anyway? He’d keep that bear aside for a little while.