"Maybe later."
My stomach twists. That's a no.
I hate that he won't let me in.
I hate that I don't get every thought in his head.
I hate that he isn't mine.
But I'm not about to unlock the vault around my heart.
How can I ask him to do the same?
"You're what?" Dean's voice echoes around the room. It's free of his usual aren't I an adorable troublemaker? tone. He's genuinely concerned.
That's weird. And worrisome. Dean only drops the pretenses when shit is bad.
And with that way Ryan's shoulders are at his ears…
This is bad.
I'm quitting the shop and moving to Siberia; it's the only place as cold as my soul bad.
I take a deep breath and exhale slowly.
There's no way he's leaving.
That's absurd.
I try to focus on the computer screen. To actually finish double-checking these records. To pretend as if I'm not eavesdropping.
I fail.
My gaze stays on Ryan's back.
He runs a hand through his wavy hair.
He shrugs, completely failing at aloof. "You're invited too."
"Fuck." Dean's sandy hair falls over his bright eyes as he shakes his head. "She's such a bitch."
"Don't talk about her like that."
"I'll say it as much as I want." Dean steps sideways, into the lobby. "Penny is a bitch."
Ryan's brow furrows as he turns and follows Dean. "I said I'm going, not ‘I'd like your opinion.'"
"You're not going."
"Yeah, I am."
Ryan is going somewhere. Doing something Dean objects to.
But Dean doesn't object to anything.
Unless—
Fuck.
Dean continues. "All right. Go. Get wasted. Stand up in the middle of the ceremony and scream ‘here's a reason why these two can't wed. Because she fucked him behind my back. And what the hell do you think that means for you, Francis? You think she's gonna be loyal to you after that?' Then drop the mic, get wasted, sleep with a bridesmaid, and come home the victor."
"Fuck off."
"You're gonna make a fool of yourself either way. Might as well do it right."
"She thinks I'm not over her," Ryan says.
"All you're gonna do is prove you care enough about her opinion to drop two grand on plane tickets and a hotel in Maui."
Penny's getting married.
And Ryan's going.
What the hell is he doing going to his ex's wedding?
And what the hell is he doing telling Dean instead of me?
Ryan's black-on-black Converse squeak against the hardwood floor as he takes a step toward the counter.
Dean shakes his head what the hell is wrong with this guy. "If you show up single, she'll think you're a loser."
"He's right." The words tumble from my lips. So much for pretending I'm not eavesdropping. But this is my business. Ryan is my best friend. I care about him more than anyone does.
Ryan shakes his head kids today. "I'm not showing up single."
Dean laughs. "You didn't—"
Ryan turns back to him. "I'm still not interested in your opinion."
"Yeah. You are." Dean shakes his head you're an idiot for this. "Or you wouldn't have brought it up."
"I was letting you know my schedule." Ryan slides his hand into the front pocket of his black skinny jeans.
"It's sweet. You care." Dean presses his hands to his heart—he's the opposite of Ryan, in his bright blue t-shirt, light jeans, and navy and white checkered Vans—and feigns catching a hug. "You can admit it."
"Right back at you," Ryan says.
I laugh. "He's got you there."
"Love you too, babe." Dean blows me a kiss. He laughs as he turns to Ryan. "Have I ever told you not to do something?"
"Well…" Ryan brushes another wavy lock behind his ear. Again, it fails to stay in place. It falls to his cheek. Frames his blue eyes in a perfect shade of brown. "She thinks I'm never gonna move on."
"You aren't," Dean says.
"Fuck off." Ryan moves forwards. Until he's only a few feet away.
His eyes find mine.
They fill with vulnerability. Then he blinks, and his expression is steel again.
"You really told her you're bringing someone?" Dean asks.
Ryan's shoulders climb to his ears. "Not someone." He tries to keep his voice even, but he doesn't quite get there. "My girlfriend."
Dean shakes his head harder. Fuck, you're stupid. "You don't even look at chicks. Where are you gonna find a girlfriend?"
"I'll do it." Words leap from my throat.
I do nothing to stop them.
I'm powerless to stop them.
This is crazy. But it's also perfect.
I press my lips into a smile. A calm this is a great idea smile, not a lovesick anything to be close to you one. "I'll go to Penny's wedding. I'll pretend I'm your girlfriend."
Ryan's eyes fix on me.
It's not a good look.
It's not a yes.
It's not even a that's a ridiculous idea, but points for trying.
More like a not in a million years.
But it's not over until it's over.
Chapter Four
Ryan
No.
Fuck no.
A million times no.
Leighton is better than this bullshit.
I need to be better than this bullshit.
I stare into my best friend's blue-green eyes, but I can't find her intentions.
Hawaii is gorgeous. I get that. Penny used to mock me for wanting to go someplace so "basic" for our honeymoon. The insult never made sense.
Basic is good.
Simple is good.
Easy is good.
Fuck knows I need easy.
Like me and Leighton.
Our friendship is easy.
So what the hell is with her intense stare?
Nobody wants to see the Aloha State that badly.
I shake my head. "I don't want shit to get weird."
My brother looks from me to her. He tries out that shit-stirring smile of his, but it doesn't land.
He's worried about her.
This is a stupid idea.
It must be the worst idea in the history of the planet if Dean's concerned. The only thing he's serious about is work. Even then, he pretends like everything he does is effortless.
"Yeah. Right. Of course." She twirls a short, purple strand around her finger. "But what if it didn't make things weird?"
"How could it not?"
"It's just acting." She taps the counter with her shiny silver fingernails. "I was Abigail Williams in The Crucible. I've performed more difficult roles."
"More difficult than pretending you can tolerate Ryan?" Dean's voices jumps back to bouncy. "Is that possible?"
"Not for most," she teases. "But I'm a true thespian."
"This is getting interesting." He motions go on.
She rolls her eyes. "Are you fourteen? Even you are better than that."