"Dangerous Noise, yeah." I zip my backpack and bring it to the counter. I'm almost ready. It's almost eight. As soon as Brendon finishes, we can go.
And I get a precious few minutes alone in his car before we grab Emma.
God, I've been craving him more and more every day.
There's something about knowing he really sees me, even the ugly parts—it's addicting.
"You know, Joel was asking about you," Dean says.
"What?" I bite my lip to keep from blushing.
"Brendon filled him in on all sorts of details."
"You mean—"
"Gotta say, Kay. It was pretty fucking hot. I can see why you're into him. Man's got a mouth."
"You have no idea."
Dean chuckles. "If he ever gives you shit, you call me."
I study Dean's expression. He's actually sincere. Sweet even. Weird. "Okay."
"Me too." Walker offers me a hug.
I take it.
"You're a good kid," Walker says. "You ever need ink, you know who to call."
Dean takes his turn giving me an attagirl hug. "Or breakup sex."
"You have a problem." Walker shakes his head.
"Just want the girl to know she has options," Dean insists.
"Look at her." Walker turns to me. "Kay, you've got options in spades. You're hot. And guys dig the librarian thing."
I adjust my glasses instinctively. "Are these really librarian glasses?"
"Fuck, like we know? We don't read," Walker says.
I motion to the Kindle in his suite. "You read all the time."
"Genre fiction," he says.
"What's wrong with genre fiction?"
"You seem more highbrow," he says.
I shake my head.
Dean chuckles. "Told you. She's writing some dirty book like the ones she's always reading."
"No." That blush threatens to inflame my cheeks. "It's a coming of age story."
"Sexually?" Dean raises a brow.
"That's part of it." A lot of it. "Sex is a part of life."
"Erotica. Nice." Dean nods.
"Just 'cause something has sex, doesn't make it erotica." Walker shakes his head. "Fucking plebeians, huh?"
I nod.
"Okay, Kay. Let me ask you this. What words are you using?" Dean asks.
"For?"
He motions to his crotch.
"Uh..."
"Cock?"
"Sometimes."
"Cunt?"
"I need to hit someone?" Brendon's steady voice flows into my ears. He's right there. In front of the counter. His eyes meet mine. You good?
I nod. This is actually kinda fun.
He looks to Dean. Then to Walker. "Why are you here? We're closed."
"For the show." Dean motions to the two of us. "And to hang with my girl. Haven't you heard? I'm giving it to Kay real good. Even promised to tie her up and spank her if she writes her dirty book."
"It's not dirty." Okay, it's a little dirty.
"He's gonna hit you," Walker says.
"Nah. Look how happy he is." Dean motions to Brendon's attempt at a stern expression. It's failing. He's too smiley.
He is.
And I am too.
It's just... perfect.
Dean laughs. "Kinky Kaylee. You're using 'cunt' aren't you?"
"Well." I wink at Brendon. "It's a powerful word."
Chapter Forty-One
Kaylee
Emma goes straight to the sink. She sets her purse on the counter and digs through it until she finds her lipstick.
I lean against the wall. Watch her add another coat of red. Try to wipe the guilt from my eyes.
It's not working.
I find the lipstick in my purse and apply another coat. But my hands are shaking. The line is messy. Like it was after I was making out with her brother.
"So..." She zips her purse and taps her fingers against it.
"So...?"
Her chest heaves with her sigh.
I keep my lips pressed together.
I can't say anything.
She can't know.
It's just not an option.
"Whatever is happening, you can tell me." She turns toward me. "I won't be mad."
I don't believe that. I force my lips into a smile. "Nothing is happening."
"You... you and Brendon are being weird. And your lipstick was smudged in the car."
"I had a snack at Inked Hearts."
"Nobody snacks at Inked Hearts."
"In the lobby."
She shakes her head. "What is it, Kay? Why don't you want to tell me?"
"It's nothing." Shakiness seeps into my voice. I want it to be nothing. Or at least nothing important. But it's huge.
"It's something." She presses her ass against the counter. Folds her arms. Frustration creeps into her eyes.
It's hurting her that I'm keeping a secret.
This is my chance.
I can confess everything.
Or I can double down on the lie.
I take a deep breath and exhale slowly.
Her dark eyes stay fixed on mine.
"I... uh... Brendon... uh. Brendon caught me and Dean." Guilt nags at my throat. It takes everything I have to keep my expression neutral.
"Oh." Emma tilts her head, turning over the so called admission.
"Yeah." I dig into my lie. "We were just kissing, but he got pissed."
"What did he say?"
"Dean's a whore. I can do better. That kind of thing."
"Did he threaten to kill Dean?"
"More or less." Or a lot less.
Emma's eyes bore into mine. "Really?"
I barely nod.
"Look me in the eyes, Kay."
"Why?" My gaze goes right to my shoes. They're grey. Canvas and rubber. Comfortable. Perfect for a concert.
"Kay."
"What?" I force myself to stare back into Emma's dark eyes. They're lighter than Brendon's. Wider. But still a lot like his.
"Tell me the truth. Whatever it is."
"I..." My voice cracks. The words claw at my gut. They make it all the way up my throat, but I stop them with a swallow.
"You..."
"I..."
"Are you fucking my brother?"
"Em..."
Her eyes go wide. She shakes her head. "Kaylee, what the fuck?"
"It's not like that."
"You had sex with my brother."
"Yeah, but—"
"He was the one at karaoke?"
I nod.
"And the one... oh God, he was offering to, ew..." Her nose scrunches. Her eyes fill with disgust.
All the details I've spilled have been about her brother.
And her best friend is a liar.
Of course she's disgusted.
I...
"I'm sorry." I don't know what else to say.
"You and Brendon..." Emma shakes her head. "How long have you—"
"A long time."