“Thank you, Ripley,” she said, beaming. “They’re Reed’s favorite.”
“Well, they are excellent,” he said.
He turned back to Bart like I wasn’t even there. He talked with Bart and Landon during the meal and only spoke to me when one of the other guys brought me into the conversation. When we were done Ripley offered to help with clean up, but Margo told him he had done enough, to go ahead and get some rest. He excused himself and left the table.
“He seems nice,” Landon said.
“I’m going outside.” I got up from the table and went to the mudroom. I put my boots back on and walked out on the front porch. I sat on one of the rockers I’d bought last spring. I rocked and I thought. Nothing was the way it was supposed to be. I was supposed to own the ranch at this point. No part of my plan included an absolutely gorgeous diva who hated the ranch and obviously wasn’t too crazy about me.
I’d spent so much time getting everything just the way I wanted it; tore down the old barn and replaced it with stables, and sold off most of the cattle and purchased great breeding stock from some of the best horse ranches in the nation. I knew from experience what made a great rodeo horse, and I intended to raise and train some of the best.
My plan B was to stay here for the year required by Randall’s will, and then I would take the money he left me and the horses and buy my own spread. The problem with that was it would put me years behind. Best case scenario was Ripley staying for the required year and then selling me the ranch. That was what I was going to focus on, making it through the next year.
I was debating going back inside when the door opened, and a little fur ball came trotting out the door and ran down the steps.
“Jinji, don’t go far, just do your business and we can go back in,” Ripley said, walking over and leaning on the porch rail, watching as his fluffy little excuse for a dog did his thing. He turned back and looked at me. “Look, I don’t want to be on this ranch, you don’t want someone like me here, so let’s just stay out of each other’s way.” The little dog ran back up the steps. He scooped him up and entered the house.
He wasn’t wrong, though. The last thing I wanted to deal with right now was someone who couldn’t see the value in a place like the Bluebird Ranch.
7
Ripley
The sunlight pouring through the window woke me up early the next morning. I had no idea what I was going to do with myself today. I needed to go into town. There had been a time when River Gorge was home and I was curious what it was like now. Had it gone the way of so many small towns with closed up stores and run-down businesses? I found that I really hoped that wasn’t the case.
I hadn’t been out when I lived here before, and I wondered what kind of reception I would receive. Would my old friends from school still consider themselves my friends, or would they pretend they hadn’t spent half their lives hanging out with the gay guy? I didn’t even know who was still here and who had left. The day my father threw me off the ranch was the day I left Randall Ellis, Junior behind and never looked back. I wondered if Miller, Corey, and Beau were still around. I guessed a trip to town was in order. Not today, though. I needed time to prepare for that. I left here a very different person. I was never the manliest of men, but I’d passed for straight. At least I was pretty sure I had. I’d done all the right things. I played sports, poorly, but I played. I wore jeans and cowboy boots and a ball cap that I usually put on backwards because that was what all the guys did. I drove a pick-up and showed animals in the local livestock shows. I never felt like me, but I fit in more than I stood out, and at the time, that was what mattered most.
Hell, if my dad hadn’t caught me making out in the barn with Jimmy Don Grayson, I would probably still be trying to pretend I belonged here. Jimmy Don was the one kid in our class that got teased for being gay. Well, joke was on them, Jimmy Don was bisexual and had married a girl he met at college. They had two kids, and here I was, as my father would say, queer as a three-dollar bill. This was a small town, so I had no doubt everyone here had heard the story and that they knew that was why I left, but back then I didn’t stick around long enough to find out what people had to say.
One thing was for sure, I was through pretending to be someone I wasn’t to fit in around here. No, instead I would just keep pretending to be a diva to prove a point to a dead man who didn’t give a shit and hadn’t for a long time. And with that thought, I drug my ass out of bed. Those thoughts were way too deep to have before coffee. If I planned to have an existential crisis today, it would have to wait until after I was caffeinated.
I tossed on a pair of sweats, pulled my hair up in a messy bun, and put on a worn graphic tee with the words “Sounds gay, I’m in” on the front. I had a slight obsession with graphic tees and owned a ton, but this was one of my favorites. Frankie said for me to be so obsessed with fashion he found my collection adorable, but some days I just liked to be comfy—with a little snark. I padded barefoot into the kitchen, relieved to find a pot of coffee ready and waiting. I opened the fridge, and to my delight, not only was there creamer, but it was my favorite kind in an assortment of flavors. “Yes!” I exclaimed, grabbing the sweet cream one out of the door.
“Sugar is in the canister over the microwave,” Margo said from behind me. “That’s my favorite creamer, too. There are some pancakes in the oven keeping warm if you want any.”
“That sounds fabulous.” I opened the door to find a plate filled with pancakes and bacon. “Oh man, bacon too.”
“I take it you’re a fan?” she asked.
“I love bacon. Have you eaten yet?” I asked, taking the food out of the oven.
“I did. You have as much of that as you want, everyone else has eaten already.”
“I’ve forgotten how early ranch life starts. This is early for me, but I bet they’ve been at it for hours, haven’t they?” I said as I filled my plate. I took a seat at the bar and poured the syrup on my pancakes, then added some extra on the side to dip my bacon in.
“They have. So, what are you going to do with yourself today?”
“I’m not sure. I was just thinking last night I wish I had a horse. I had one growing up. That was the first thing I did when I found out my father had died. I checked to see if Maxie was still here, but he sold her years ago.”
“If you’re wanting to ride, you’re welcome to ride my horse. She's a quarter horse named Lucinda Star. She’s a good girl, easy to ride.”
“I would love to ride today if you really don’t mind.”
“Not at all, I’m sure she’ll love having someone take her out. I don’t ride as much as I used to. You’ll find saddles and everything else you need in the tack room.”
Once I’d finished eating, I went to get dressed. My determination to not change myself so I would fit in on the ranch meant I didn’t have any clothes that were good for riding. If I decided I wanted to ride after today, I’d need to get more appropriate clothes. But for today, what I had would have to do. I put on a pair of designer jeans and my boots. I looked more like I was dressed to go to the club than to go riding, but honestly, the horse wasn’t going to care what clothes I had on.