She and I didn’t talk, not even after she saw her sister.
We continued to pretend the other didn’t exist. She faced the wall while she slept and I faced the other way, so we never touched throughout the night.
I looked forward to leaving the camp just so I would have my own bed again.
I hated sleeping with people, even with my lovers. It could be a king-size bed and she could be on the opposite side, but I still hated it. The touching, the breathing, the closeness, I hated it. I always moved into another bedroom when the sex was over. They were used to it and didn’t ask any questions.
I hated being asleep with someone else in the room.
I just couldn’t do it.
I did it now because I had to. And I did it once before…because it was different at the time.
The night before I departed, I told her the plan.
She was on the floor watching TV, so I grabbed the remote and turned it off. I sat in the chair at my desk, turned sideways so I could look at the bed.
She got to her feet and looked at me, knowing I wanted her attention.
I nodded to the bed. “Sit.”
She did as she was told. She sat at the edge and looked at me, fidgeting with her fingers like she was afraid I’d decided to throw her out of the cabin. She’d been quiet as a mouse, staying out of my way like she feared I would have a change of heart and abandon her. She stayed silent and gave me all the time I wanted to speak.
I looked at the floor for a while, unable to believe what I was about to say. Before she came to the camp, my life was routine. It was ordinary. Nothing unusual happened. But then she came in, like a fucking storm, and destroyed everything. “I’m leaving tomorrow.”
She inhaled a deep breath, a painful breath, like she pictured her fate in my absence. The emotion happened instantly, the fear entering her tight features and making her eyes slightly wet. The Red Snow wasn’t the subject of her nightmares. That was being forced against her will, for someone to desecrate her body when there was nothing she could do to stop it. Death was a dream in comparison.
“You’re coming with me.”
Her head lifted to look at me, her hands stilling in her lap. “What?”
“I’m not freeing you. You will remain a prisoner. Try to run, and I’ll kill you. If you betray me and escape, my brother will execute me. If you want to repay my kindness toward you, you won’t do that to me.”
She breathed hard, as if she couldn’t believe the truth.
“You will accompany me while I’m in Paris. When I return to the camp, you’ll go back to work like the others. I couldn’t ask Fender if I could stay in the camp indefinitely, so I asked if I could take you with me…just as he’s taken Melanie for himself. It was the only solution I could find.”
She stared at me in her stillness, like she couldn’t believe anything I’d just said.
“Don’t make me regret this.”
She nodded. “I won’t try to escape. I promise.”
I looked away and felt the bitterness flood my mouth. “I wish I could believe you.” I’d have to lock her in the house while I was gone, handcuff her to the bed or something. All she needed to do was walk out of the place and disappear. I’d hunt her down again eventually, but if I didn’t do it quick enough before Fender found out, I’d lose my life.
“If running results in your death, I won’t do it.”
I still wouldn’t look at her. “I know you. I know you’ll do everything you can to save your sister, the women who are prisoners now, and no amount of loyalty to me will change that. These are your words I’m echoing back to you.”
“I know, but things are different now.”
I lifted my head and looked at her. “Why?”
“Because I knew you wouldn’t be killed when I burned the camp. Now, you will…and I can’t let that happen. You’re a prisoner to this place as much as I am.”
I shifted my gaze back to the floor. “You’re wrong about that.”
“You don’t agree with the rules of this place, but you stay. There’s a reason why. You just haven’t told me what it is.”
We left the next morning.
I helped the men load the wagon with the prepared product so we could leave the camp and make it to the end of the road before sunset. I left Raven in the cabin while I helped the loaders, but that meant she didn’t report for work with the others.
I made my way back through the clearing.
Alix watched me.
I walked past him, knowing there would be trouble.
“Where the fuck is she?” He followed behind me.
I kept going, moving out of the clearing and toward the cabin.
“Asshole, I asked you a question.”
My knife was in my pocket if I needed it.
“The only reason she shouldn’t be at work is because she’s dead. So, tell me she’s dead.” His footsteps quickened.
I turned around and faced him before he came too close.
He pulled his hood down so I could see how angry he was.
“I’m taking her with me.”
“What?” His voice was so loud, it echoed off the surrounding trees.
“She’s still a prisoner—just in a different place.”
“Are you fucking kidding me with this shit?” He got in my face, spittle flying from his mouth.
“The boss agreed to it. Let it go.”
“After what she did, she just gets to leave?”
“She’ll return and get back to work.” I turned and continued to walk.
He grabbed me by the arm.
I spun around and quickly threw his arm down. “Stop this.”
“You’re such a traitor.” He spat on me.
I let it get on my clothes and didn’t wipe it away. “I’ve kept my mouth shut about your behavior up until this point. But if you don’t keep your shit together, I will have you killed. This is his decision. You’re just pissed off that you can’t fuck her. During your time off, spend your money on a nice whore.” I turned away.
He followed me. “No. I’m pissed that she killed our men—”
“Who enslaved and killed innocent women.” I turned back around. “Stop changing the narrative. We’re the villains here. She did what anyone else would do…if they had the balls.”
He stood still, staring at me like he couldn’t believe a single word that flew out of my mouth. “Are you one of us? Or one of them?”
I didn’t know how to answer that question anymore. “I’m loyal to my brother. Always.”
He spat at my feet. “Doesn’t seem like it.” He turned around and walked off.
I watched him go before I moved to the cabin to retrieve her.
She was sitting on the edge of the bed when I opened the door. In her work uniform and with no possessions, she immediately turned her eyes to mine when she saw me.
I nodded. “Let’s go.”
She got off the bed and joined me.
I took her to the gate through a different route so we could avoid the clearing. The guards already knew she wouldn’t be reporting to work and the women obviously realized it too, but it was smart not to flaunt her existence.
“The guards won’t punish you for this later?”