She slowly turned around to face me, her eyes angry. “This isn’t some douchebag I don’t get along with. This guy is evil.”
“Alix was going to rape you, but Fender stopped it. He did it for me, but even after everything you did to make him hate you, he still did the right thing. His love for me was stronger than hatred for you. He’s not evil.” There were other times when Fender had shown his true colors, other moments of mercy he granted when it was unnecessary. “When you destroyed the camp, he could’ve tortured you and killed you, but he didn’t. When I saved you from the Red Snow, he allowed it. When you took off with Melanie and tried to run, he let me spare your life. He’s not as evil as you think he is. He’s done a lot of shitty and unforgivable things, but he’s done good things too.”
Rage moved into her face. “I understand he’s your brother and you feel conflicted, but I don’t understand how you can defend him. He kills people.”
“But he doesn’t want to. He’s never wanted to. He just couldn’t find an alternative.”
“And that makes it okay?” she asked incredulously.
I didn’t know what I could say to make her understand, to understand why my brother was the way he was. “Imagine if your mother, the woman you hold a vigil for in your heart, came home one night and decided to kill you both. She squandered your family’s wealth and, instead of living with that shame, decided everyone should die. How would that make you feel?” It still haunted me to this day, a grown-ass man about to hit thirty. “Could you imagine walking into your house to discover your dead sister executed in her sleep? Could you live as the sole survivor?”
Her eyes shifted back and forth slightly as she met my gaze.
“He lost all faith in humanity that night. He was never the same. He’s obsessed with building wealth and strengthening our noble family name, as if that’s the best way to spite our dead father. He’s been obsessed with that goal to the point of insanity. He wants to bring honor back to our family, like that will somehow bring my dead mom and siblings back to life. He’s mentally ill, to be frank. This doesn’t justify what he’s done at all, don’t misunderstand me, but he’s not evil like all the other men out there who get off on shit like that. He’s just been so focused on his goal that he’s ignored all the horrible things he’s had to do to get there. I told you I would end the practices at the camp, and I meant that. I’ve never agreed with any of it, and I never will. But my relationship with my brother is never going to go away. I see more of him than you do, and I know that’s hard to understand. I know I can convince him to dismantle everything and let the past go. It might take me longer than you want, but it will happen. But if this is a lifelong commitment like you say it is, Fender will always be a part of that. You will never escape him. So, you should be there for Melanie on her big day, if and when that happens, because everything you stand for will be honored. We will move on from this…and start over.”
Her expression didn’t change, but she didn’t seem as angry anymore.
I knew our relationship was as strong as the bond I had with Fender because of everything we’d been through, so I wasn’t afraid to watch her turn her back on me and walk away. But I was afraid she would think less of me because of the love I had for my only brother, the faith I still had in his soul. “We are the same. You’ve had to live with your sister’s idiotic mistakes and have had to fix them, but you’ve never turned your back on her because you still believe in her. That’s exactly how I feel about Fender, just in a different scenario. I believe in his redemption. I can’t give up on him. I know you, of all people, can understand that.”
The subtle rage left her eyes, and she started to calm herself once again. “I understand your perspective, Magnus. But you also have to understand mine. I’ve sat in that clearing with women who risked their lives to help me, and I had to watch one die every week…because of him. Melanie sat there in the clearing with me and witnessed the exact same thing. And that’s why I don’t understand. How could you fall in love with the man responsible for such a heinous crime?”
I was never in the clearing to witness it because it was too difficult to watch. My aversion to the practice was well known, so I refused to participate. Even if Fender wanted me to be the executioner, I would refuse.
Raven continued to look at me like she expected a counter.
Honestly, I didn’t have one. “I guess she’s witnessed enough of his other qualities to forget about that.”
She wasn’t angry anymore, just disappointed. “I have faith that you will end this, Magnus. But I’m not entirely convinced that your victory will happen because your brother has a change of heart. I just hope you have what it takes to do what is necessary.”
It was a scenario I hadn’t even considered because it was too repulsive. Even if my brother deserved to die, I couldn’t be the one to take his life. I couldn’t be like our father. But I also couldn’t stand by and watch the killings continue. I would have to do something…no matter the cost.
When Fender returned from the camp, I went to his estate for a visit.
I didn’t tell him I was coming, just showed up. Gilbert let me inside and escorted me to the living room, where I would wait for him to join me. Gilbert served me a glass of wine and placed a cheeseboard on the table even though Fender and I wouldn’t touch it. Sometimes it seemed like he did those things just to make the place look nice.
I sat alone and tried to think of the right words to say, something that would persuade Fender to put all this behind us and move on. His greed made him stubborn, and his stubbornness made him greedier.
Footsteps sounded on the tile, but they didn’t belong to Fender.
Melanie took a seat across from me, wearing an expensive dress with her hair nicely done. Now, she always looked like a modern French countess, with diamonds in her ears and jewelry on her wrists and fingers. On her left hand was a diamond ring that looked almost too heavy to wear.
She fidgeted with her hands before she looked at me. “Fender just got out of the shower. I thought I’d take the opportunity to talk to you.”
I stared at her, seeing the similarities between her and Raven. They had the same color eyes, but Raven’s had so much more depth to them. Melanie’s timid nature annoyed me. She looked uncomfortable in her own skin; she didn’t know how to have the confidence her sister possessed. It made her seem weak. I loved that Raven owned the room every time she stepped into it, and she stood tall and proud and commanded every ounce of respect that she deserved.
“I just wanted to thank you for what you said the other day…that you understood my feelings for Fender. I know it’s going to be really hard to get my sister on board with this, so I need all the help I can get.”
I shook my head. “I didn’t do it for you.”
She looked slightly stung by my honesty. She wore her feelings on her sleeve, and as a result, she was delicate. “I also wanted to thank you for being so good to my sister. She’s always the one taking care of everyone else, but no one takes care of her. It makes me happy to know she has a man who will do anything for her. I just wanted you to know that.”