“Because of your ex?”
“Let me guess, Felicity told you—”
“Actually, she didn’t. But I’m no fool, Mya. I know you’re running from something.”
It wasn’t like I tried to hide who I was and where I came from, but it unnerved me that Jason saw through me so easily.
“Look, whatever’s going on with Ash, something tells me he’s not going to come to me or Cam with it. But maybe he’ll open up to you.”
“You want me to use his feelings for me against him?”
“That’s not...” he let out a heavy sigh. “I’m worried about him. I’ve never seen him so out of control. It’s Asher, he’s like sunshine on a rainy fucking day or something. But tonight was different. He was...”
“Dark,” I whispered.
“Yeah. I don’t know what the fuck is going on with him but whatever it is, he needs someone there for him.”
“He has people. He has you and Cameron and Felicity and the rest of the team.”
Jason grumbled, “Does he know that though?”
“I just don’t want him to get the wrong idea.” My hands curled into fists, pressing against my thigh.
“I’m not asking you to marry the guy. Just be a shoulder to lean on, an ear to listen. Things haven’t been the same between us since everything went down and I know he feels pushed out because Cam’s with Hailee and I’m with Felicity.”
When I didn’t answer, Jason’s words swirling around my head, he added, “He’s a good guy, Mya.”
That was the problem though. Asher was good. He deserved a girl who could be in the moment with him one hundred percent. I wasn’t sure I could be that for him.
I wasn’t sure I wanted to be.
“You don’t think it would only make things worse for him?” I asked.
“What the fuck does that mean?”
“It doesn’t matter,” I huffed indignantly, annoyed at myself for even bringing it up. Maybe Flick was right, maybe I was making a bigger deal out of it than it needed to be.
We rode the rest of the way in silence. It was one thing I liked about Jason; he didn’t feel the need to fill awkward silences. He also didn’t push. He’d said his piece and now the ball was in my court.
Only I didn’t know what the hell I was going to do about it.
“Well damn, girl, if you don’t look like a bird is nesting in there.” Aunt Ciara eyed my wild curls with amusement.
I smoothed a hand over my bed hair and waved her off, making a beeline for the coffeemaker. I’d had a restless night, replaying things over in my head. The drunken conversation with Asher. The friendly advice from Felicity, and the strange ride home with Jason.
“Rough night?” my aunt asked.
“Something like that.” I made myself a mug of coffee and sat down at the kitchen table.
“I was talking to Maeve yesterday and she told me the best news. Her grandson, Tyrese, is coming to stay for the holidays. Isn’t that great?”
My brows pinched, blood pounding between my ears. “Tyrese?”
“He’s a good boy. Studying business at UPenn, I think. Visits his gram whenever he can. I’m surprised he’s still single.”
“Aunt C,” I groaned, not liking where this was headed.
“Now now, don’t go getting all riled up. We know better than to meddle. But would it really hurt you to come visit them with me one day?”
Yes, yes it would. It was bad enough she had an opinion on everything but now she was trying to set me up with her friend’s grandson. It couldn’t get much worse.
“It won’t hurt for you to have another friend here, Mya,” she said when I didn’t answer.
“I have friends.”
“And I’m sure they’re great. But Tyrese is...” She hesitated.
“Black?” I questioned, disappointment dripping from my voice.
“That’s not what I was going to say. But now that you bring it up, yes, he is. He’s a good solid Afro-American man who has been raised to respect women. After Jermaine, he could be just what you need.”
“I’m sure he’s a good man.” I rose from the table slowly, letting the chair scrape across the tiles. “But I’m not interested.” Dumping my mug on the drainer, I walked out of there, not bothering to stop at the sound of my aunt’s voice.
She’d gone too far this time.
Thinking I needed her all up in my business. Jermaine wasn’t just some guy I’d foolishly fallen in love with. He’d been my best friend since forever. We had history; our lives were entwined. He was a good guy but like so many before him, he had been tempted by the easy money running for Diaz’s crew could give him. Opportunity didn’t come knocking in our neighborhood.
Drugs, gangs, and crime did.
I slammed the bedroom door behind me and made my way over to the bed, only to be interrupted by the blare of my cell. Glancing at Shona’s name, I ignored it, dropping onto my bed and clutching a pillow to my chest. Mom was right. Unless I made a clean break, I would never escape my ties to Fallowfield Heights. But it was my home. Not to mention the fact my mom would never leave there. How was I supposed to just forget them? To turn my back on my roots?
The answer was, I couldn’t.
Not yet.
Chapter Eight
Asher
“You look like shit.” Jason smirked at me as I padded into the kitchen, the smell of bacon turning my stomach.
“Fee, baby, not that I don’t usually love seeing you in my kitchen—”
“You need to eat,” she cut me off, grabbing the pan and shaking the contents onto a plate. Usually I would have been the first to dive in, but I could barely look at it without my stomach churning.
“I really don’t,” I grumbled. “I need water and Advil. Lots of Advil.”
It wasn’t unusual to see them in my kitchen on a weekend, especially after a party. But this was one morning I didn’t want company. My head was pounding, my body felt like it had gone ten rounds with our defensive line, and I had murky memories from the night before... memories I’d rather forget.
“Which one of you put me to bed?” I asked Jason, and Cam who was awfully quiet. They glanced at each other and then me.
“You don’t remember?” Cameron asked.
“I have a few black spots.”
“We didn’t put you to bed, man. Mya did.”
“What the fuck did you just say? Mya wasn’t even at the party.” I knew, I’d looked for her enough. But that was before all the tequila... and Jack... and shots.
Too. Many. Fucking. Shots.
“She turned up,” Flick added, pushing a plate of breakfast toward me. I just stared at it, trying to sort through the hangover haze clouding my mind.
“She was here?”
“Yup.” Jason bit into a piece of crispy bacon.
“Well, shit.” It was one thing for my friends to see me trashed, but Mya?
That wasn’t supposed to happen.
Fuck.
“Did she... say anything?”
“After watching you puke for an hour? The girl was traumatized.”