“You said you wanted a baby.”
“But I never said anything about making love.”
Clover stumbled into her living room. I followed, closing the door and picking my path through the darkness. Was never sure if Clover was part cat or just lucky—the woman needed only the glow of a faraway laptop screen to see in the dark. Part of a skill set learned on one-too-many-overnight flights.
She plunked onto her loveseat—the only furniture that fit in her cozy home. Twin lavender blankets coiled in a corner on the couch. It made for her usual nest. Perfect for snuggling against me while she turned into a blazing inferno during our Friday-Night-If-There’s-Not-A-Game-Or-Flight-Movie.
“When you say…make love…” Clover air-quoted the words. “What…does that entail?”
“You might be a virgin, but I was led to believe you knew how babies were made.”
“I considered it a transaction. Not an…experience.”
And that was our biggest problem.
I paced, but my foot nudged a paint can tucked under her coffee table. Clover had been busy. Each of her living room walls was swatched with a sample of a different color. Blue Raspberry Jolly Rancher spotted the far wall. Butterscotch yellow near the window. Sour Patch Kid pink over the bookcase. Between each color she’d doodled a cacophony of different hues, shades, and saturations.
Strange. The woman never stayed in her house long enough to return the vacuum cleaner to the closet instead of leaving it in the far corner. Suddenly, she was redecorating?
Maybe she was more serious about a kid than I thought?
“I want to make love to you…with you.” The word sounded dirtier than when I’d practiced the speech in the car ride to her house. “You told me you’d never had sex. I take that to mean that you’ve never been pleasured at all by a man.”
“I…” Clover tightened her grip on her robe. “It’s not that important to me.”
“Bullshit. You’re a virgin. You don’t even know what it is. You should be swept off your feet and ravished until the sun comes up.”
“Not every girl cares about…a night of passion.”
“It’s your first time.”
“So?”
“So? It’s supposed to special and momentous and…” And not with me. “You should know that some talented and generous men can offer you more than the pulse setting on the hot tub massager.”
Clover flew off the loveseat and tangled her legs in her blanket. “What…what are you talking about? What did you see, Adrian Alaric?”
The shame of it couldn’t burn away the memory of the most erotic goddamned minutes of my life.
“Couldn’t see much of anything through the bubbles,” I said.
“Adrian.”
I smirked. “I saw a beautiful woman who deserves a hell of a lot more than a couple tickles from a pool jet.”
The woman covered her face with her hands. “Oh. My. God.”
“You looked like you were having a good time. I wasn’t about to interrupt you.”
“You saw everything?”
Saw it.
Fantasized about it.
Died each time I realized I hadn’t been the man to give her that pleasure.
“I did ask you to christen the hot tub…”
Clover couldn’t look at me. Her breathing hiccupped with panic, and she tangled herself even tighter in the blanket as she attempted to escape her nest to pace the room.
“I cannot believe I orgasmed in front of my best friend!”
Now I was really confused.
After a lifetime of concussions on the ice—and one very intimate hit to the star of the show—maybe I’d forgotten a few of the basics about reproduction.
I bent down to free her from the knotted blankets. “You’re upset because you came?”
She shushed me with a fluttering slap to my shoulder. “Don’t say that word.”
“What the hell do you think will happen when we make a baby?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t think I’d orgasm.”
This was sounding like a shittier proposition by the minute.
“…Am I still allowed to come?” I asked.
Clover groaned. “Of course. That’s important, don’t you think?”
“So is your orgasm.”
“Haven’t had many before.” Her eyes widened as she looked away. “Especially independent of a hot tub. I think I’ll survive if we just…get down to business.”
Oh, fuck no. “No deal.”
She clutched her neck, inadvertently tugging her robe tighter over her curves. The satin rose up, up, up, teasing her hips.
And she had no idea what she did to me.
“It’s awkward, Adrian.”
“So…you think a night of bad sex is less awkward than me blowing your mind?”
“I don’t know!” She flailed her arms, and I dodged the blow to my kidneys. “I’ve never had sex, Adrian. I know what to do, but I don’t know know what to do, you know?”
“No?”
She sighed. “You’re practiced. I’m not. No matter what I do, it won’t be as good as you’ve had before. So, I just hoped that maybe…I could be thoroughly unforgettable to you.”
“You? Unforgettable?”
“And maybe that’d make it less awkward. Maybe it wouldn’t ruin everything. Maybe you could have a little fun, and I could get the baby, and we’d just laugh about it all in a few years.”
What was the worst sin? Jeopardizing a lifelong friendship with the only soul in this world who understood me…or allowing this woman to go another moment without experiencing the true pleasure of my bed?
But what exactly was that pleasure?
I wasn’t a gentle guy. Wasn’t the sort of lover who could tenderly lay a virgin down, nestle between her thighs, and gently rock us to orgasm.
I was a hair-pulling, throat-choking, ass-smacking son of a bitch who turned his women into hell-cats who begged for more orgasms while impaled on my cock.
I’d never made love before.
But there was no way in hell I’d treat Clover the way I’d fucked my other lovers. I’d take it slow and steady. Soft touches. Murmured words. Secret kisses. She deserved that.
Even if I didn’t.
“I’m going to make love to you, Clover. If you want this baby…then we do it my way.”
She nibbled her bottom lip, and I envied the tug of her teeth. “And what’s…your way?”
I smiled.
“I’m going to take my time with you.” I drew close to her, staring down at a woman smaller than the devil’s heart and burning hotter than his throne. “And I’m going to show you exactly what sex is all about.”
“Is that…a good idea?”
“Only if you want to be pleasured. Truly pleasured. Worshiped like the goddess you are.” I hardened, but she didn’t seem to notice, lost in the baritone of my promise. “I will give you a night of unrepentant pleasure so intense that every time you touch yourself, you’ll remember my kiss, my cock, my seed.”
Her breath puffed in a shaky pant. “Don’t you think that might make this…harder?”